I'm living After Wls (not the best way)

Yes!  Way more than anyone of these message boards can begin to give her.

(DISCLAIMER: I have not had my surgery although I am dutifully preparing for it on March 18th) but those are the same three words I was thinking  Backing you up on that

I take medicine for anxiety and depression.It was one of the best things I have ever done.I am losing weight.I had a full hysterectomy 2 years ago and I am losing weight.I have never felt better in my life.If you are afraid of taking the medicine.I think you need to go seek some help.I am not saying this to be mean.I am saying you will feel better.Don't you want to feel better?Maybe getting help will make your life better.You may not regret having WLS.

As far as your kids are concerned when they are ready to do something about their weight they will.You are going to push them away from you.If you want to spend time with them I would stop the judging. If the food issues with them bothers you.Don't see them at meals.I used to be every close to my mother in the past few years she has been not very nice to me.I stay away.I used to love having fun with my mom.But since she can be so judgmental I only see her 2 times a year and talk to her about once a month.Go talk to someone.If not a therapist.Talk to your doctor.

I also take medication for anxiety and depression. With a good doctor you can monitor any weight gain and find sunsetting that hopefully avoids it. When anxiety is affecting your life so greatly, 5lb is nothing in the grand scene of things.

I think putting taking medication as one of the best things I ever have done right next to my surgery.

Amen to that!

I will admit that I may not have had surgery if I hadn't started medication-- seven years of searching for meds that worked (I have reasonably severe bipolar and have been on some very heavy-duty psych meds) added 80lb. With each med, I'd gain some, lose a bit, and gain more with the next one. But I was heavy to start with, and who's to say I wouldn't have gained that much without them? Besides, without medication I am pretty much unable to function, so I'll take that tradeoff; I have a good marriage, I can keep a good job, and I'm emotionally stable, and for that I am a lucky woman.

Anti-anxiety medications do not just magically cause weight gain and most don't even increase the appetite (Even most anti-depressants -- which are FAR more likely to result in weight gain-- don't actually CAUSE weight gain... they just increase the appetite and people eat too much and THAT causes the weight gain).

Perhaps you should reconsider your decision not to take anything for your anxiety, because I really think it might help you.

Lora

I don't even know what to say.  This post is depressing.

Lady, you need therapy.  Badly.

"I have regretted wls, I have anxiety real bad,I refuse to take meds for it, I have seen many people post op that start anxiety meds and regain weight back." 

Huskergal - Please don't let this be the reason you don't look into anxiety medication. Not every one gains weight on anxiety meds. If you do notice a weight fluctuation happening with the meds you can "tweak" a few things in your daily diet to stay on track. You write that you wish your thoughts would not get the best of you - that's what the medication fixes.  Free your mind - look into medication.

A second avenue to pursue would be therapy. Sometimes it takes a professional to teach us how how to rewire our "stinkin' thinkin'" process. 

Good luck   

Debb

You haven't tried the CORRECT meds for your anxiety.  When you find the right one, it's magic.  Your mind clears of all the cluttering nonsense (like how much other people weigh and what they eat) and you can think clearly. 

Don't blame your weight loss surgery for your problems.  They only operated on your guts.  What you've got going on now is all in your head.  Different doctor, different treatment. 

Often we repeat history with food issues in families.  Hark back to what your mother did with food, is that better than what you are doing now?  Why not break the circle of bad advice (Subway isn't good food: it's way high in carbs) and take a nutrition class for normies so you can effectively counsel your grandbabies?  Nagging never works.  If it did, we wouldn't have comedians. 

How is it you are the first and only WLS patient I've ever heard of who credits calcium supplementation for heart plaque build up?  The studies I've read have stated that more research is needed on this issue.  And those studies were all done on NON-weight loss surgery patients.  Which don't apply to us.  The studies all said that DIETARY calcium is NOT bad, but that supplemented calcium (again, no specific type, whether citrate or other) had a higher risk.  But then again, heart attack risk increases as we age, so it might just be entirely coincidental.  Kind of like saying "the WLS ruined by teeth because now I need crowns".  After the age of 40, we all need crowns.  It's not always the WLS that's to blame.  Sometimes it's just life.