I'm living After Wls (not the best way)

 I don't like who I have become after Wls..I go to the grocery store with my 37 yr old son and see all the ****ty food in his cart.frozen pizza's ice cream, margarine ,chips, the list goes on 2 large carts full.. I had to move away , I never moves away before, its hard to hold back whats on my mind, he said he was going to stop smoking and eat healthier this yr. he bought a juicer this year too. he hasn't done either one. I just wanted to scream at him. for the sake of being in public and my grandson there beside us I kept quiet. I took my grandson to Subway , got a ham and cheese sandwich with all the vegetables, took the food to a table he opens the sandwich and takes all the vegetables out and eats the rest.  Yesterday I did some errands with my 29 yr old daughter who has yet gained another 20 lbs .my god does it ever stop!.said she weighs 240 at 5' 4in.she said she is mad at herself for getting that large then goes home and makes sauage and gravy. I know those kinds of foods cannot be on your menu if you want to lose weight.I never eat them ...

I will do extra work  just to get more exercise, I mow my neighbors lawn I scoop my neighbors side walk of snow , I help my boyfriend scooping snow on his driveway so I get exercise .. I don't complain.. a couple of days ago I was shopping at the Salvation Army and saw this woman with her daughter there shopping also. Both dressed nice but each lady had to of weighed 400 lbs each..I wanted to hand the mother one of my Wls surgeons business cards..but no I kept quiet , but the thoughts that run through my mind thinking back when I had my first heart attack at that weight. well almost that weight, I was 300 lbs not 400... it's like I want to scream at everyone who Is Obese but know I can't so this tells me I have changed greatly after Wls, I thought I was a compassionate person ..When I go grocery shopping I walk down every isle to get some walking in.. I kinda laugh about it. I go in the store for one item and walk down every isle while there. I don't walk at the malls, too many shootings.. well I walk where I am , I make way to get exercise where ever I am..

I know I have posted here that I regret having wls, but whats done is done, I am proud of myself for not regaining my weight loss all back or even half of what I have lost. never had more than a 5 lb. regain... Anyway .. I just wish my thoughts would not get the best of me, I am still a compassionate person most of the time. I hope my family don't disown me because I do voice my thought when in our homes...

thanks for taking the time to read my thoughts after Wls. almost 7 years P.O.  March 19th  is my day...Life has been a challenge Post Op. I've learned you can still have heart attacks Post Wls. my last one in April 2013 was caused from too much calcium built up in my heart arteries..I was taking 4 pills  of 500 mg. of calcium citrate along with plenty of calcium fortified foods every day.. too much of a good thing can go bad. live and learn. glad I am still here to tell about it... have a great day where ever you may be. ....PeaceV Wendy

Therapy will help you. 

Frustrating to not be able to change other people, isn't it, especially when you see them being so harmful to themselves? I decided a long time ago to not go there, and just focus on what I can do to work with me. That keeps me pretty busy.

I think your exercise is a very good thing, both for you and for your heart.

Happy almost anniversary!

Please don't hand out your surgeon's business cards or wear a T-shirt saying "I had weight loss surgery and you can be skinny too".  I had a friend who wanted to make that t-shirt up during the first year after surgery when she thought she had discovered the cure for obesity.

Some of those 400 pounders are failed weight loss surgery patients.  Not everyone has the ability and dedication to stay the course.  Your son and daughter are trying to lose weight while walking around with a stomach the size of a two liter bottle of soda.  Your stomach is more like the size of the bottle cap on that soda, or maybe the size of an egg, but much easier to fill up.

I just went to Walmart for eight cans of catfood and spent an hour walking there, because it is snowing and 12 degrees with strong wind here in Ohio today.  I had an 80 calorie fish filet for dinner and I will be full for hours.  I know that I am lucky to have had the surgery and to have been successful with it.  I have seen others fail and feel compassion for them.  I have much compassion for people who think they can do this with a juicer and no surgery.

We have been given a wonderful gift and need to be grateful for it and make it work for us.  There is nothing to be gained by feeling contempt and anger towards those who are struggling without the surgery or who had the surgery and failed to maintain their loss.

Maybe you shouldn't go shopping with your son. What do you think you would have done if someone came up to you and handed you a card for a weight loss surgeon? I know I would tell them to shove it someplace not nice. We all had to be ready to make this change in our lives. If we are not willing to change then the surgery is useless.I think talking to someone about how you are feeling.It may help you.

People are not ready to change until they are ready to change. How old were you when you had your weight loss surgery? Perhaps your children will be ready before then, maybe not. Remember, they grew up learning eating habits from you, so a little empathy is in order.

When I was obese, I knew people were judging me. I make a conscious effort to be kind and respectful to all people but especially those fighting their own battles with weight. A smile and a kind word go a lot further than a lecture and contempt.

BTW, from the numbers you have shared, your BMI is still in the 'overweight' category.

Sometimes you really just steal the words right out of my head!

My thoughts exactly Laura from Texas.  Well put!!  

Lets not forget where we came from!!!

I agree with all of this and will add that for myself, after a LIFETIME, literally from the womb of being obese, it took a photo a friend posted to 'shock me' into reality and to get with the program and look at WLS as my only (I do truly believe) option for myself. 

Does it drive me crazy to see people doing things I myself used to do? Sure! Is my saying anything to them going to help? Nope! The surgeon who did my husband's surgery looked at me during the seminar we attended for HIS surgery and asked me what procedure I was interested in and I very huffily told him I was there for my husband, NOT for me. I could not see it. Your kids CANNOT SEE IT. Strangers CANNOT SEE IT. No one can...until they open their own eyes. You cannot open the eyes of another. My husband was over 2 months post-op before I had my epiphany and it had NOTHING to do with my choice. In fact, just a few days before 'the picture' I had said there was NO WAY I could make the changes my husband was making. Two weeks later...in the office with the surgeon!

But you need your own epiphany. Everyone has to have their own 'ah ha' moment.