We are NOT normal

I'm sorry, but it's true.  When we decided to investigate Weight Loss Surgery, what did we want?  To be NORMAL.  How did we want to look?  Normal.  Well, the sad truth is, we are NOT normal.  We are very special, and we need to continue to treat ourselves as very special. 

I've seen so many post about weight regain lately.  Why do you think that happens?  I think it's because you're still trying to be normal.  If you've had a weight regain, how are you eating?  Sure, I believe you're eating much less than you used to, but you're probably eating way more than you were at about 4 weeks out.  I know it happened to me.  I'd go out for lunch with friends and get a salad with some protein on it.  Eat most of the protein, some of the greens, and then there wasn't enough to put in a doggie bag, and everyone else was still eating, so . . . I picked at the salad until it was mostly gone.  Greens compact easily and slide through that ever-increasingly stretched stoma when you keep forcing it through.  And yes, it was hot outside, so I had a little water with my meal.  And then, once I'd crammed all that food in and was so uncomfortable, well, maybe a little water would help wa**** down and I'd feel better.  Unlike a lot of you, I've been unable to vomit since surgery.  Just does not happen, even when my little pouch is screaming for relief, I just can't . . . am unable.

I have bad blood sugar issues so I can assure you I was not eating the wrong kinds of foods.  They made me very sick, so I just couldn't do that either, but I could eat too much.  Is that what you're doing too?  Are you trying to eat like a normal person, even if you're just eating healthy food?  

Get out your little pyrex or gladware containers you used when you first came home from the hospital.  They hold about 3-4 ounces of food.  THAT is what you should be eating.  Not food on a dinner plate, with 1/4 protein, 1/4 carb, and 1/2 leafy greens.  That is way too much food.  When I realized what I was doing, I thought I would be starving if I just put my plain greek yogurt, a few almonds, and a few unsweetened blueberries in my pyrex bowl.  You know what?  I wasn't hungry.  The only change was, my stomach didn't hurt from eating!!  There is no glass of fluid of any sort on the table now when I eat.  I am not allowed to have it because I am NOT normal!!  If I'm thirsty, I can have something to drink in a half hour or so.  Remind yourself, every day that you are special, especially if you've had an RNY or Sleeve.  You had that pouch made tiny because that's all you can put in there.  Stop trying to be normal, and treasure yourself for the jewel you are.

 

What works for one might not have any bearing on another.  Most people who have read my posts know I drink with meals and always have and always will.  I DO NOT eat a lot, I DO NOT like to feel full or even as if I have eaten.  The instant I feel like there is food in my stomach I have trained myself to stop eating, no matter what I am eating.  It is exactly as my perfectly healthy normal weight son has eaten his whole life, it is NORMAL.  Stuffing food in your face when you are not even hungry is what isn't normal, the difference between us and everyone with no weight problem is food is the drug of choice for us, for every emotion, for every occasion, for every event.  To break that habit means you have to break up with food and put it back into its proper perspective.  I know I will never regain all my weight until I honestly don't care at all about life anymore and give up.  Until then I know my body well enough to know when to stop, back off and adjust.  It is part of the learning curve of learning what Normal really is.

Very true.  I think we all try to mimic what is normal for the majority of people.  I don't know anyone who stops eating as soon as they feel food in their stomach (except, now, you!).  American restaurants and advertising certainly don't make things easy for us.  Everything (almost) is based on heaping proportions.

Good message.  We are special!  Thanks for the reminder.  I am maintaining my weight loss by following the rules. Just like the rest of the successes.  WE HAVE TO FOLLOW THE RULES for our surgery. 

Carol

Well said. We also have to stop thinking that there are all these "normal" people walking around who can eat what they want when they want they don't exist

NOBODY is Normal.

Well, some are, Mike, but they're so boring!!

Those delightful, smart, funny, and endlessly entertaining girls on bariatrictv use the term surgically altered freak which is how I will always think of myself.

Linda, I just found and read your post. I am new on the board, been on before but never active. I have promised myself to check in daily. THANK YOU for your post! What a light bulb moment! And, I don't mean the government-regulated bulbs being pushed down our throats! ( yes, I have a lightbulb stash!) I mean the real, as many watts as you want to pay for bulbs! I am one of those who is gaining. And, I thought for some months I was normal! Have been eating exactly the way you stated, not until stuffed, but "normal" portion sizes. WOW! A question- I remember hearing the Dr. say that one day our 'normal' would be about 1/2 a sandwich, 2 small slices of pizza, etc. Are we not supposed to do that? No wonder I'm gaining weight! Never, ever, thought about stopping before my stomach felt full! I also do not like the feeling of an even slightly full stomach, if truth be told, I feel best before I've eaten anything for the day! Thanks so much!

To tell you the truth, Tina, I'm not really sure exactly what we should be doing, but I don't think a lot of the doctors know either.  So many of my friends who went to surgeons other than mine were told to eat three meals a day and no snacking.  How in the world is a person with a stomach the size of an egg supposed to get enough nutrition on that schedule?  Especially without stretching the stomach?  My doc said five to six small meals a day, and I'm finding that is what works for me.  Also, I'd practically kill for a sandwich or a slice of pizza!  I am so carb intolerant that I cannot eat any starchy things at all.  I'm not a doctor, but I can tell you that as soon as I realized I was trying to eat normal meals and wasn't paying attention to small meals on a more frequent schedule, is when I started to balloon up.  I went back to small meals in small containers, always carrying around some raw almonds or some small snack in case I was starving, and the weight began to come off again.  Hope that helps you!