Sex question more so for the ladies

Ok off the wall question..  Been married for 15 years, had surgery in 2007.  I think I look good, ok well I do look good, I hear it from my husband all the time.  BUT, I have NO desire for sex.  This is soooo hurting our marriage.  He told me tonight that he can not go on like this, and he thinks I am not attractive to him.  I am I just have no desire.  I know my iron is low since all I do is crave ice....  any help would be greatly appreciated. 

 You may  need bioidentical hormones  Deb.  OR more vitamins .

  One o f the BEST things  U can do to jumpstart the sex drive is RUN    .. but if U don't feel healthy enough or motivated enough or energetic  enough to want to DO that ...  that's a red flag right THERE

.     Please look at VITALADY's   lists for the vitamins U should be taking ..perhaps U re missing something essential ..... 

hugs 

Debbie, do you have any past "issues" that you might need to address? I went through a period of time when I felt little to nothing, sexually speaking. I think it stemmed mostly from things I hadn't dealt with from my childhood. After I got that stuff kinda of "straightened out" in my mind, I felt more free.

You don't say how old you are, but if there's the possibility of perimenopause, you might want to see your gynecologist, too. Hormones... bleah. They can really get screwy (no pun intended!)

Maybe get a blood panel done, get the hormones checked, counseling... all three of those could be helpful, I would think. At least you're addressing the issue. Now you just have to find the solution, right?

Good luck! I hope you can get answers.

~Nicci

 Craving ice is a symptom of being low on iron. I also crave it. Been crunching on ice for 18 years it has ruined my teeth. Now I use an ice shaver to shave it down. A dr. Is the one who told me that craving ice could mean your low on iron. I was tested and he was right. So you probably need some iron pills. When your iron's low you have no energy.

 In my experience ANY iron (  other than   elemental iron WORKS wonders . My hair fell out in Drain fuls until I found  Ferritin ..   ).

Also U may be missing ZINC 


some therapists call zinc  the sex- mineral  

Its GREAT that Ure addressing the issue (  lucky Hubs )   

Don't Stop ti'll Y a Get Enough        

Why do you not recommend elemental iron?  I use carbonyl iron, which is all elemental iron, and I know many RNY folks that do.  It's absorbed easier in us than ferrous sulfate and the other iron salts and is also less likely to cause constipation.

Are you getting your labs done regularly?  Because then you  know for sure if you are low in iron or anything else.  You take an iron supplement, right?  But you might need more.

Have you talked to your doc about this issue?  Maybe your hormones are out of whack or something.

I'm 6 years post op and married for 21 years, and yes, my horndog left the yard some 4 years ago.  It may be hormones, but my doc keeps telling me sex is in the head more than anything, blah blah blah...I know it's more than that because I SO love my hubby and find him sexy, HOWEVER, I just don't "feel like it" most of the time. 

How do I do it?  I know myself, and know that if I get started, I WILL want to finish, so I do.  Once I'm into it, I'm having fun, he's having fun -- win/win.  I just have to push myself a little.  In between, plenty of hugs, kisses and laughs, so there's lots of affection going on when the nookie is set aside. 

I do miss my inner horn-dog though, if you find him, please send him home to me.

This is a really good book that is very helpful.  www.amazon.com/Sexual-Anorexia-Overcoming-Self-Hatred/dp/156 8381441/ref=sr_1_1  These sexual issues of addiction or anorexia  are often closely related to obesity, and other forms of addictive behavior.  It is a workbook style approach that you can work on together. 

Wishing you and your husband much happiness in 2012.

Best,

 really?

tee