B*TCHFest: My public service to you

   
For you NEW KIDS, HERE ARE THE RULES: 

"B*TCHFest"  is provided as a public service to those of us who have gripes and grievances but who (whom?), for whatever reason, lack a regular forum in which to air them. You are welcome to voice any problems - large or small, important, mundane or ridiculous -  that currently have your panties wadded, your shorts frosted and your gears ground. Don't hold them in and risk future medical issues, wrinkles and/or those pesky gray hairs.

ANY and ALL issues that are plaguing you are open for you to voice; there are no "sacred cows." They say that "feelings aren't facts", so if you're feeling it, it's legit to you. NO ONE is allowed to flame a poster for something he or she writes, however commiseration is not only welcomed but encouraged. Please, no personal attacks against other OH members (at least, not by name) and  ABSOLUTELY NO SURGERY WARS!

I'll start you off with a few gripes of mine, and you all can join in at any time! No limits - come back as many times as you like!

WARNING! Adult content ahead! Posts may (and probably will) contain "adult" content and language. I know that MINE will. Rated TV-MA.


I have to get some **** off my chest. Join me, won't you?

- Dear dogs: I love you to death, but can you PLEEZ stop barking at NOTHING??!!

- It's only the middle of November and I already hate Christmas. Why are we being forced to hear Christmas music in every store, Christmas-themed ads on TV, blah blah blah. ****! I can hear one running right now on the TV in the other room. I like Christmas. I like Christmas music. I like shopping and wrapping and decorating a tree - AFTER THANKSGIVING! Hell, I'm even Secret Santa's Little Helper on the LB Board. But it's getting earlier and earlier every year that advertisers and merchandisers ram the holidays down our throats. Stop it.

- Who the **** ever gives or gets a new Mercedes or Lexus for Christmas, anyway?? What bull**** (NB: if any one of you *****es ever have, don't tell me. I'll slap on an adult diaper, drive all night to your house and key that ****** )

- Missing my DH. He just went back to work, and he's working days (8:30 to 5.) I'm freelancing nights (5p to 11p or 1a.) Yes, working is nice. Having SOME money coming in is terrific. But I never see the guy. A couple of minutes in the morning, and he's in bed sleeping when I get home. 

- Exhausted, too. I get home around 1 (or later.) Try to get to sleep as quickly as I can. Doesn't usually happen for another hour to two. Up at 6 to walk and feed the dogs with him (we have 4) and then take him to the train. Crawl back into bed when I get back to try like hell to get more sleep. Crabby, cranky, tired, having a hard time focusing. And I'm certainly not focusing on my weight loss and eating right.

- That long period between when you work and when you get paid. I have $13 in one checking account and $73 in the other, and don't get paid until Friday. What the hell was wrong with paying people EVERY week? Was it really that costly to employers?

- $787 a month for health insurance that doesn't seem to cover a hell of a lot. In August, I went to a walk-in clinic because I got bitten by a Rottweiler (big, deep bite, bled like hell). Had to have 2 followup appointments with them to make sure wound was healing right and not getting infected. Covered? Nope. Just got a $600 bill from the clinic **** If I had gone to the ER and incurred thousands of dollars, they probably would have covered it.

- People who just had surgery a week ago and are *****ing that they're not losing weight fast enough. I feel for you - I know we all want instant results, but life ain't like that. Let your body ******g HEAL, and then see if the magic happens.

- People who can't even SPELL the name of the surgery they had. Really? THAT'S your research?

- People who use "textspeak" in their posts. I'm sorry, if you want me to read your post, you're going to have to come closer to English than "Cn NEone hlp me????" And turn off your caps. And stop typing in the smallest font available, and in PINK. It's almost impossible to read. If I have to work that hard to figure out what the hell your problem is, I'm just not going to bothering trying to help you.

**** I'm in a bad mood. Maybe it's time to take my $13 out for some retail therapy. Your turn. Have at it! ***** away, *****ers!!! 

 Neighbors who start their leaf blower at 7:00 IN THE FREAKING MORNING!!! On a Saturday no less!! (I'm getting out my bagpipes for THEM next Saturday)

People who do the MINIMAL amount they can when they see a horrific crime in progress, and wonder why they are getting ripped a new one

Post after post of "grey ghost people" with a big question mark!!  They scare the bejeesus out of me! I can't get my picture to load either, but I'd still rather see a picture of SOMETHING, than that scary a--  ghostly profile!  :D

I'm going to ***** about:

The guy, with bad breath, that told me the Packers suck.  **** you!!!

My stomach.  Way to big.

Men that try to flirt with me.  Can't you see the wall I put up?  Besides I really don't like men that much.

My kid that can't budget and is bleeding me dry.  Love you more than my own life, but come on already.

The fact that I will never be able to kiss Sully Erna's tummy tattoo. :(

While beating a dead horse, people that drive with one bright and one regular headlight.  ******g fix the light, you are blinding me as I drive home from work at night.

Cat poop.

Dog poop.

The neighbor who thinks he is better than me because my yard is a mess. I hate yard work and ain't going to grow flowers or weed, so get over it.  I don't care that you "can't stand to look at it." Dandy lions are yellow.  I like yellow. I dandy lions one word or two?  One or two? Who has a clue?

Wal-Mart.

The fact that I am a loser at life.  Oh well, it is what it is.

 

 

 

Dandelion.

Having to rearrange my frickin' weekend off around a kid's schedule because she didn't put it on the calendar. 

 No signed budget and a husband who works in government contracting and purchasing.

Rain. Cold rain.

Annual inventory at work. Outside. In the cold rain.

Having to use my umbrella to shield the inventory count sheets rather than the scribe while doing annual inventory outside in the cold rain.

Inventory count sheets that suck up the moisture in the air even if one shields them from the cold rain with the umbrella that's meant to keep one's own butt dry.

Pencils that will not write on soggy inventory count sheets once they soak up the moisture from the air even when shielded with the umbrella that was meant to keep my butt dry.

Juggling a clipboard, pencil and umbrella while trying to flip the pages and write down the counts with a recalcitrant pencil on soggy inventory count sheets.

A wet butt.

 

Maybe this will make you smile.

That plus a warm blanket and protein hot chocolate...I'm smiling!

Thanks!

Bruises that take forever to fade on my face (no worries, I paid for the privilege of having them..) but still, I feel like I can't go out in public w/o someone looking at me like I was battered so I've been in hiding for a week.

Cat with dermatitis, trying to pill said cat.. getting new holes for my trouble. Finally learned, cheddar cheese + pill = no blood. But cat is getting wise.. she's no longer eating the cheese, *****