The Skinny ***** Phenomenon.
SW 327
I was the one that mentioned skinny ***** phenomenon on your thread. I have experienced it several times. I don't care when my friends from my WLS world call me that to my face bc from them I take it as a compliment.
Other times I have been to support groups or events where I have been snubbed and stared down and that is upsetting bc I am a nice person, I have 7 years of WLS experience and knowledge to offer, I have pregnancy after WLS experience to offer, I have divorce after WLS experience to share, being single after WLS experience to offer etc. If people could just remember that I am there bc I was also MO and that I have a lot of the same issues as them even though they may be a newer post op and down from a 24 to a 16, while I am years post op and a 24 to a 6-8, they will get there one day. Don't hate, appreciate lol
Other times I have been to support groups or events where I have been snubbed and stared down and that is upsetting bc I am a nice person, I have 7 years of WLS experience and knowledge to offer, I have pregnancy after WLS experience to offer, I have divorce after WLS experience to share, being single after WLS experience to offer etc. If people could just remember that I am there bc I was also MO and that I have a lot of the same issues as them even though they may be a newer post op and down from a 24 to a 16, while I am years post op and a 24 to a 6-8, they will get there one day. Don't hate, appreciate lol
Believe nothing, no matter where you read it, or who said it, no matter if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense. - Buddha
I'm not a skinny *****....yet. But I did come out of the surgery closet at work because I felt kind of hypocritical by not being honest about how I am losing weight.
I sadly think we as women are taught that any woman who we perceive as better looking or more desirable is a ***** and competition, so we must do everything in our power to pull her down. Kind of like high school times 10.
I sadly think we as women are taught that any woman who we perceive as better looking or more desirable is a ***** and competition, so we must do everything in our power to pull her down. Kind of like high school times 10.
We are currently at a conference for bariatric physicians. I have found myself identifying more with the patients than the practioners.
In fact, I was tossing around "We morbidly or super morbidly obese patients" rather frequently when the confused looks and a glimpse in a mirror reminded me, I don't look like I belong to 'we' anymore. Not sure I'll ever not 'belong' in my heart of hearts though.
Naturally this led to a confession that I had had the DS...which required explaining because NOBODY knows what it is--in fact the surgery discussion tomorrow will cover only Band, VSG and RNY.
Admitting that I had gone the surgery route also earned me the status of pariah and both Steve and I have been greeted with whispers of 'Shun the unbeliever. Shun!'
But I find this whole realm (of medical bariatrics) mildly disturbing. It is all about keeping patients coming back for weight loss for 10 years or more--and this particular practitioner admitted she doesn't see many SMO or even MO patients, it's basically, to use her words, "just cosmetic". There is no 'end', no success. And the patronizing attitudes of many of these practitioners has me ...wielding the 'We' of solidarity. Don't tell me how 'horrible' it is for these patients. How 'special' they are and need to be handled gently because of their failures. How one must never mentioned 'weight loss' except behind closed doors lest it make others uncomfortable. It made obesity sound like an unmentionable social disease. (I may have ditched that seminar halfway through, lest I lose my temper and make others unfortable)
I may wear jeans that have a tag saying 4 but I'm pretty much a fat ***** in a skinny package.
In fact, I was tossing around "We morbidly or super morbidly obese patients" rather frequently when the confused looks and a glimpse in a mirror reminded me, I don't look like I belong to 'we' anymore. Not sure I'll ever not 'belong' in my heart of hearts though.
Naturally this led to a confession that I had had the DS...which required explaining because NOBODY knows what it is--in fact the surgery discussion tomorrow will cover only Band, VSG and RNY.
Admitting that I had gone the surgery route also earned me the status of pariah and both Steve and I have been greeted with whispers of 'Shun the unbeliever. Shun!'
But I find this whole realm (of medical bariatrics) mildly disturbing. It is all about keeping patients coming back for weight loss for 10 years or more--and this particular practitioner admitted she doesn't see many SMO or even MO patients, it's basically, to use her words, "just cosmetic". There is no 'end', no success. And the patronizing attitudes of many of these practitioners has me ...wielding the 'We' of solidarity. Don't tell me how 'horrible' it is for these patients. How 'special' they are and need to be handled gently because of their failures. How one must never mentioned 'weight loss' except behind closed doors lest it make others uncomfortable. It made obesity sound like an unmentionable social disease. (I may have ditched that seminar halfway through, lest I lose my temper and make others unfortable)
I may wear jeans that have a tag saying 4 but I'm pretty much a fat ***** in a skinny package.
No. The self-righteous smugness of the skinny to slightly overweight Nuts, MAs, Nurses and Physicians, I kind of expected. We (the boss man & I) are in the minority having actual life experience as MO people. I'd say 97% of the practitioners at this conference have never dealt with anything more than 'Gee, it would be nice if I could drop a few pounds' on a personal level.
Because my ONLY experience of medical bariatrics is surgical in nature, I view treating obesity as one does any disease: figure out how to live through it while you find a way to make it go away.
I realize that is a simplistic view but subjecting people to years of weekly/biweekly/monthly weigh ins, meal replacements, medications and exercise prescriptions doesn't quite feel right.
I know that our close relationship with a bariatric surgeon sets us apart here. Surgery is greeted with a shudder and 'Oh that poor soul!'. Steve stomped my toe at lunch today when an OB/Gyn who is looking to add medical bariatrics to her practice bemoaned the hideous life-long complications of folks who succumb to surgery's siren song. Apparently, over lemon meringue tarts is not the time to engage in prosyletizing.
We tend to hold a slightly different view about surgery. (Grin)
Oh, and though I'm certain it won't get read as this post is at the end of a longish thread already, I'd just like to point out that Diana and other like her with pro DS posts are obviously needed. I'm at a conference of 500 bariatric practitioners. We've met 1, one, un, uno, a singleton who knows what the DS is. The doc presenting the "Oh my gawd, they've given up and are having surgery" talk tomorrow will discuss Band, RNY and Sleeve, no DS. In fact, when Steve heard him speak at the ASBP conference in MAryland, this doc swore up, down and sideways that the Duodenal Switch was NO LONGER BEING PERFORMED IN THE US. Based on the syllabus for tomorrow's talk, he ain't learned a damn thing since having a real live DS'er in his lecture. Tomorrow he will have 2 of us and 25 others sitting in our little corner of TX cheering us on.
Because my ONLY experience of medical bariatrics is surgical in nature, I view treating obesity as one does any disease: figure out how to live through it while you find a way to make it go away.
I realize that is a simplistic view but subjecting people to years of weekly/biweekly/monthly weigh ins, meal replacements, medications and exercise prescriptions doesn't quite feel right.
I know that our close relationship with a bariatric surgeon sets us apart here. Surgery is greeted with a shudder and 'Oh that poor soul!'. Steve stomped my toe at lunch today when an OB/Gyn who is looking to add medical bariatrics to her practice bemoaned the hideous life-long complications of folks who succumb to surgery's siren song. Apparently, over lemon meringue tarts is not the time to engage in prosyletizing.
We tend to hold a slightly different view about surgery. (Grin)
Oh, and though I'm certain it won't get read as this post is at the end of a longish thread already, I'd just like to point out that Diana and other like her with pro DS posts are obviously needed. I'm at a conference of 500 bariatric practitioners. We've met 1, one, un, uno, a singleton who knows what the DS is. The doc presenting the "Oh my gawd, they've given up and are having surgery" talk tomorrow will discuss Band, RNY and Sleeve, no DS. In fact, when Steve heard him speak at the ASBP conference in MAryland, this doc swore up, down and sideways that the Duodenal Switch was NO LONGER BEING PERFORMED IN THE US. Based on the syllabus for tomorrow's talk, he ain't learned a damn thing since having a real live DS'er in his lecture. Tomorrow he will have 2 of us and 25 others sitting in our little corner of TX cheering us on.
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