Part One of a Three Part Question. (Read this first.)

My husbands car wa**** and totaled by a hit and run driver.  Insurance paid to "make us whole"  His car was fully paid off, in good condition, and had low mileage.
(We got a newer used car and so now we have car payments.  but that isn't really part of the question, even though that part bugs the **** out of me)


Last night, we got a call from the Public Defender.  She's asking us to drop charges because the driver, somewhere around 25 years old, is "a good kid, with no record, and only took off because he was scared " She said, "a criminal record could ruin his future"

What would you do?  Drop charges or not drop charges?

( I told the public defender, that my husband and I would like to discuss this further and I would get back to her next week )

(I'll post Part Two and Part Three later.)

25 is not a "kid"    It's a grown a$$ man.  

He broke the law on two accounts.  First, he was driving without insurance.  Second, he fled the scene of the accident.  He didn't even stop to see if he had hurt anybody.  Leaving you with a car note to pay just rubs salt into the wound.

Let the public defender do her job and defend him in court. 

 I agree 100% and I'd imagine she tries the path of least resistance with every client.

 Ugh, that's a rough one.  If you don't press charges and he does it again, guess what?  He'll be a 'good kid with no record'.  

I would press charges, let the driver plead as he feels is right and roll the dice with the judicial system.  Scared or not, good kid or not, he did wrong and he needs to be held accountable.

I'll PM you my story.

ETA:  I'm not smart enough to send you a PM.  If you are interested in hearing, send me a note.

Hell no I wouldn' drop the charges. Like So Blessed said-he's a grown man, and being an adult means you have to take responsibility for your actions.

If no one ever holds him accountable for his actions, how will he ever learn the improtance of "manning up?"

The public defender is doing her job -- trying to get him off. But you have no obligation to help her out.

My experience and what I have read says that people who do things like drive without a license and/or flee the scene of an accident are normally habitual offenders who constantly flout the rules of the road. They often have multiple accidents to their name, many points on their license, etc. But they constantly are able to get out of any consequences for what they do. Often, their record looks clean because each time they guilt the person into not pressing charges or weasel out of them on a technicality.

Personaly, I'm a hard-nose about it. I think those people need the to be taken off the road. I definitely wouldn't be dropping any charges! Let the courts decide if he's a "good kid" or a "menace to society". That's what they are there for.

Seems to be pretty well unanimous. If you consider a 25-year-old a kid, what lesson will he learn from getting off scott free? Me, I don't consider a 25-year-old a kid. If he's that irresponsible at that age, he NEEDS a wake-up call.

From what you have said....your insurance company is the one with a claim. It may be that the claim must go through you for them to collect.
As far as the young MAN (?)...everyone with a criminal record was clean before the first time they broke the law. Seems to me that he will be paying the insurance company for your car in the future.
Is your insurance going to go up?????

 *I* would tell her to FOAD.

I wa**** by an uninsured driver years ago. Here's what happened...

The court forced him to pay my deductible.
My insurance company sued him.
His license was suspended as well as his tags on his car. So was his father's since he co-signed for the car.

I only wanted my deductible. The state and insurance company pursued the rest....nutchin' to do with moi. Such an azzwipe to ask ask you to drop charges.

Love that avi!  Is she giving birth or what??