Since you enjoyed it last time: B*TCHFest!!

OMG!!!!  We have a lady like that in my office too.  She is allergic to everything!!!  And every smell in the free world gives her an asthma attack...mind you I have never seen her have an allergic reaction or an asthma attack.  She complains non-stop about every smell.  I finally told my boss that there is no rule that says I can't wear the lotion I want to wear and eat the food I want to eat.  If she can't deal with the every day smells in an office maybe she needs to quit...my boss just stared at me as I walked away...hahaha. 

Oh and she likes complete quiet because she can't concentrate...she even complained about someone humming so softly I couldn't hear them...but she could, with her super-human ears!!!!

 

My co-worker is so out there, one day she told me "You look at me like I have a third eye."  My response was "That's because I can't believe half the stuff that comes out of your mouth"

I work with one of those too! Everything gives her a migraine.  

She *****es and complains when I spray air freshener around my cubicle, but I told my boss if the ***** would wear deodorant and wash her clothes with SOAP every once in a while so that the BO didn't waft behind and around her like Pigpen then I wouldn't have to use so much air freshener!

  He then looked at me and said "your breast are big" and I replied "Wow! Both your dick AND your brain are small.!"

That would have been a better reply

 (laughs) Spend a week with me, girl. I show you how to think fast and talk snarky! 

I'm on my way

 You KNOW you're gonna have to shave that head, right? 

hmmmm...Not to sure about the bald head...lol

I'm in minnow paws.
 
I've been feeling like I'm gonna start a period for the past month, all crampy and bloated and *****y and EVERYONE in my life has started taking stupid pills, and yet I haven't started a period.

I've tried everything to make it start - came to work for a 12 hour shift in white pants, and left all my tampons at home, which usually guarantees a HEAVY FLOW , but no. No dice.

I just hope I don't accidentally kill my entire family, several co-workers and a couple idjits that were driving down the road and got on my nerves.

Oh, and the hot flashes are unpleasant. I woke up drenched in sweat and my stupid husband was just laying there, sound asleep.

 < me
 < My husband, the *******.

And for the guy at work who leans up on one butt cheek and lets fly with the farts.....Dude, the coughing attack doesn't fool anyone. We all know what you did.