Mixed Reactions

I don't come across it much. I think people are scared to say crap like that to me.

But i would probably say something like "Why would you be against the only treatment for obesity that actually works? That seems pretty dumb to me."

Okay, I might actually only think that that last part.

I have also come across this attitude, and actually, in my case at least, it's been more from MO folks.

I cannot tell you the number of MO people I have discussed my surgery with who have all said that they would never consider WLS as an option, that they would instead choose the healthier diet and exercise route. 

Two of them have actually done the diet and exercise thing since our discussion, and both of them have failed in actually keeping the weight of once they lost it.  As I also did before WLS. 

So far, all the MO folks I have discussed my WLS with are still MO and miserable with their weight issues.

Sure glad I took the "easy" way out... 

How I react to these types of comments depends...if I have an emotional investment in the person or care about what they think, I may explain my perspective. However, if the person is a casual acquaintance, I usually let it go.

If the person is receptive, I will explain. By the time I am done, I think I may have given the commenter "food for thought". I tell them that I was over 400 pounds for 25 years and yo-yo dieted to now avail.  I explain that this was the hardest decision I ever had to make. I further explain that even though I had the tool, it was blood , sweat, tears and a completely new attitude about food that allowed me to lose over 250 pounds. I finish by saying that unless one has actually been there, they cannot fathom the private hell we go through deciding if WLS is right for us. 

That usually does the trick. In the end, we have to please ourselves, holding fast to the idea that we have the strength of our convictions.  

I have learned that ultimately I know what is best for me and if people don't understand or agree, it's okay with me.

Take good care!
xoxo Pam

Thanks everyone. I am currently trying to discuss this with someone who's mom went through wls and is dead set against it. According to her i just have to work harder, get out to a gym with a personal trainer, make better food choices, yada yada yada. I make darn good food choices now. How much healthier does lean venison, white meat chicken, fresh fish, and veggies grown organically in my own garden have to get??? And as far as joining a gym?? Oh yeah I want to go huff and puff and look stupid trying to do the exercises my size 2 trainer gives me. Never mind the fact that I simply am not physically capable of doing them or the fact that I can't afford a gym with a personal trainer. I have FMS so lets try something I CAN do... which is pretty much not a lot at this point. Anyway, i am at the point where I am just saying "thank you so much for caring about what happens to me but this is a life or death choice for me. Either I have the surgery or i die from some obesity related disease. I'd like to stick around for another 50 years so this is what has to be."

So walk away and quit trying to discuss it with her. She's brainwashed.

Why are you bothering to discuss it with this person? I'm not sure this is a productive use of your time or mental energy. You don't need anyone to bless your decision to have surgery.

I was told that she was a good source of information as her mother had had wls and she was the one who cared for her mom later in life. She asked me some questions that i thought would be the sort of questions would be the sort of questions a person providing information would want to ask. However she then sent me several messages after I replied to her questions saying how the surgery killed her mom... blah blah blah.. i havent resonded to her since because obviously she has a closed mind about the whole subject and is not providing information but rather is trying to talk me out of it. So there is no more discussion. She has her opinions I have mine.

People who don't have weight problems don't really understand.  People who do have weight problems and are against WLS are in denial or uniformed or both.

That would like me saying that I think smokers, alcoholics and drug addicts should not seek help and should either kick on their own or just die from their disease.

And so what if it is about being skinny.  We all deserve what we want and need out of life and it isn't anybody's business if we want to look our absolute best and be healthy too.

Phyllis I agree that it can be about getting skinny and looking great but I just meant that it is not my number 1 motivation. Its definitely in the Top 5 though lol