WHAT A YEAR IT HAS BEEN

A year ago today, I had a total knee replacement. I was so afraid of that surgery - I had had previous knee surgeries and could remember the pain and agony. I went to the hospital that morning with cold fear in my heart. If the pain from the surgery were the only problem I had to deal with in the last year, it would have been a breeze. I have to admit that the pain was bad - but the pain control was good. I spent 3 days in the hospital and 11 days in a rehab hospital. In rehab, I took 20mg of hydrocodone every four hours and 100 mg of Ultram every four hours, alternating with the hydrocodone. This is the only way to get through the intense physical therapy after a joint replacement. Three days after my surgery, I found out that my apartment had been robbed; we lost almost everything of value we owned. In fact, it was robbed twice - they came back and go more stuff while my son was off calling the police. What little was left, my son took to my sister's apartment for safe keeping. The police told him not to go back to the apartment to stay because it was "marked" as an easy target. So, he was staying at my sister's. That was a Sunday. Monday afternoon, I was talking on the phone after coming back from PT and had the TV on but it was muted. They were covering a major apartment fire - and I recognized the complex as where my sister and neice lived. I immediately started trying to call but got a busy signal. I tried calling my sister at work but no one answered the phone and I could only get my neices' voice mail. Finally, my son called me - it was their apartment along with 11 others. He had been sleeping on the sofa and went to the kitchen to get a drink when he noticed a bright light coming from my sister's bedroom (the door was closed to keep my cat separated from their cat and dog). He went to the front door and opened it to a wall of flames. He then went back through the living room, grabbed his PlayStation and went into the other bedroom where he broke out a window to escape. They lost virtually everything in that fire, including both cats and the dog. Thank God, no humans were lost. I felt as though my entire family was under a very dark cloud and didn't see a way out. I was laid up in a hospital bed and couldn't do anything to help. My financial situatioin was bad - I had to take FMLA to have my surgery done - so I had no income. I was dependent on Food Stamps and help from County Welfare for my rent and utilities. I didn't think things could get much worse. Well, they did - but it took a while. Over the course of the last year, I've begun to rebuild my life. My knee healed and is doing ok. However the other one is deteriorating rapidly. Walking even short distances is becoming more and more difficult. I had planned on having the surgery to replace it in September. Again, I would have to take FMLA but was working on a way to get through that. Then it happened. I got laid off. Out of the blue, with absolutely no warning. End of income; end of insurance. That was two months ago - my insurance continued through this month but will terminate tomorrow. In the last two months, I have filled out more than 40 applications for jobs and sent off over 150 resumes. I am still unemployed; I have had three interviews. The market is overrun with people looking for jobs and my age is not in myfavor. I don't have the option of Cobra for the insurance since my unemployment will only cover my rent and electricity. We are depending on my son's tip money to pay for our other expenses and food. Unfortunately, that is not a guaranteed income and it's difficult to budget. I could never have survived the past year if I hadn't had weightloss surgery and lost over 180 pounds. There is no way I could have endured the stress and the physical demand on my body. Even as bad as things have been, I thank God every day for this life-altering surgery and the new opportunities it has afforded me. And I pledge each and every day to do my best to not mess it up. I do slip up; I'm not perfect - in fact, I'm far from perfect. But I know I was given a second chance and I know that it's up to me to make the best of it. I have decided that I am a survivor. And I will survive this latest upturn in my life. It just shows that no matter how comfortable you are; how much you think you have things under control, you never know what the next day will bring. But I do know that whatever it brings, somehow, someway, I will face it with courage and dignity (I hope). At least, I will face it with a little optimism. Patty Open RNY 11/29/01 TT 2/4/03 -181 pounds

Patty, Thanks for sharing, you give me so much hope and most of all are a terrific role model to us all. love, margaret

Dear God (((((((Patty))))))) Cathy

Good Grief Patty.......my thoughts are prayers are with you....and your son.....You certainly have the right attitude! I wish you the best of luck for a favorable outcome! Laura

Patty, I am soooo sorry for all that you have been through.....bad things seem happen to good people. With all you have been through you have such a optimistic outlook.....I don't know how you do it....most people would crumble under so much stress. Sending hugs and prayers your way Roger

Patti, Bless you for making it through that year so far. As for a job, what is it you do or did prior to all of this? Perhaps there are folks out here on the boards that could help you network into a new job. Follow this up, there are a lot of real angels floating around out here, just like yourself- Dx

Can you apply for short term disability through Texas? I know NYS has short term disability plans. I would also submit an application for SSDI benefits. With your continuing medical problems, you would probably be eligible on your first try. That would, at least, give you a monthly benefit and coverage for your medicals. You probably already know this, but you can get info on applying through www.ssa.gov. Here in NY, there is health insurance for individuals with lower/no income. It's either low cost or no cost depending on your income. Do they have that in Texas? You may also want to contact your government Vocational Rehabilitation Program. They can help you find a job, and understand disability issues related to working. Are you writing that you have a disability on your applications? A lot of companies ask for this information, however, it is illegal and discriminatory to do so. (Per ADA) This address is the website for the Texas Rehab Commission. They have a lot of services available, take advantage of them!!! (I work for NYS Voc Rehab) http://www.rehab.state.tx.us/index.html Boy, I do hope things get better for you!

Patty: From the first time I came to this board you have been such an inspiration to me. Now reading the story of your past year I am in even more awe. May God keep you safe and bless you with wonderful changes in the year to come. You ARE a survivor. Thank you for sharing. Kathi

Wow, what a tough year. I am rebuilding my life also. I went though a divorce and am in my first year of being a single parent. I have been hit with expensive car repairs, plus household and dental expenses. I have learned to take each day as it comes and accept small increments of improvement. My faith in God gets me through. I will be praying for you!

((((((((((HUGS)))))))))) Just remember that God is on your side and he will never forsake you!!!! He loves you and so does everyone on this message board. Stay strong!!!! annie