** WHY EAT AROUND YOUR SURGERY***

Jeez!!! She would never be able to handle the pig candy.

"I will pray all the things I want for myself that they come to you."

That, my friend, would be very cruel.  I have no desire to develop a neurosis about food.

do you think that a support group is supposed to blow rainbows and puppies up your butt???


Support dear is like an underwire bra, not always comfortable but often needed.

IF you give me the power to trigger YOU when I tell you about an incredible cookie I ate at 8 months out with friends who watched my eyes roll back in my head and watched me eat ONE cookie over a 5 minute period.... then you have way more issues than this surgery alone can fix.

I ate that cookie at a special event.  A friend of mine had made them.  IT WAS the BEST cookie I've ever had both before surgery and since....  and I enjoyed EVERY bite of it.

I had already eaten my protein shake for breakfast
my meat for my lunch
some carbs in the way of veggies and cheese...and fruit...

I wanted to try this cookie and I did.

if you feel that I'm attacking you,  I'm sorry.  I've been where you've been.  I'm just trying to get you to be a realist.

Nessa is one of the most supportive people on this site. NOT ONE of her words in the post you are responding to is an ATTACK. She is being SUPPORTIVE. If you can't stand to hear of someone eating a cookie, this is something WITHIN YOU that YOU need to work on. She's not saying what she is saying to hurt you, but to help you.

I eat cookies (well, no more than one, and usually not even one). I do it because I CAN. It serves MY PURPOSE.... as I'm currently trying to GAIN weight, even while I'm in a "need to lose" mentality. I have issues, but I don't think that anyone on this website, or indeed any human being other than myself is to blame for the issues I have.

I tried a candybar when I was eight months out, because I wanted to CHALLANGE myself. I wanted to be sure that I COULD handle the temptation to eat ONE (or two) and NOT eat the whole bag. I did overdo it a bit, now and again, until the bag of candy was gone. You know, I didn't buy the same type of candy the next Halloween. I bought candy that was both LESS tempting, or MORE friendly (dark chocolate). I avoided the candy I would still eat but that would make me feel awful (dump)... I learned something about myself. I gained STRENGTH in learning what I could and couldn't do. Knowing my limits helped me to do BETTER. To avoid temptations, and know what wouldn't tempt me too far. To realize that a tiny bite of dark chocolate as a reward every day.... figured into my plan... and kept me from being TEMPTED by other stuff throughout the day. One tiny bite of dark chocolate a day got me through each day. Helped me. Gave me strength. Eventually I didn't NEED that chocolate reward for good behavior each day. I bought a bag of chocolate minis (dark chocolate) and have had few of those and don't really need to eat them daily, because I know that I'm now at the point of eating like a normal person (or rather, a normal eating disordered person who doesn't eat much). I try to remember to eat one. What I do is deliberate. I feel no remorse or guilt. I never have. Each misstep usually led me to dump and feel awful, so I had no reason to feel guilt ... my physical symptoms were enough punishment thankyouverymuch.

I followed or didn't follow my plan as part of my own discovery of self, of limitations, and recently as part of my concerted effort to curtail a dangerous habit of not eating at all. My WHY is honestly different from others' WHY because we all have our limitations and our freedoms.

Now.... why do some folks OUTeat their surgery and regain a large percentage of their weight, or all of their weight? WhY? I have NO FREAKING CLUE! I mean seriously? I can't see how ANYONE consumes enough food to regain. I have trouble exceeding 900 calories in a day. I dump on so many things. I have extreme restriction. It seems IMPOSSIBLE to regain. Seriously impossible. I did regain about ten pounds at one point in my journey, but only because I dropped about thirty when I almost died in late 2009. Regain after illness is a natural process. But other than that I have never had anything resembling regain. I cannot fathom out-eating my surgery.

Beyond everything it is essential to understand YOUR limitations, and LIMIT what you eat or do not eat based on the foods that will or won't trigger your food issues.

I end this by saying yet again, you will UNDERSTAND the answer to your question BETTER when you are a postop. I am NOT putting you down, I'm simply sharing a fact of life. I doubt you could truly IMAGINE what it would be like to have a PENIS, because you don't have one now. YOu could try to imagine, and you might.... but it is truly impossible to know what it is like to have a body part that you currently don't have. You are getting a new body part, and once you have it and are healed and eating normal food again, you'll KNOW what it is like to have this new altered organ. This is NOT a put down. I feel sad for you if you cannot realize this.

"Perhaps you can eat one cookie once in awhile but MOST CANT!!!"

Relatively speaking, I can.  There are many people here who can.  You're throwing around a **** ton of judgement, and I don't know if you realize it.

Given your posts here, you may want to seriously consider getting a good one-on-one therapist, counselor or psychologist to work with to talk about your personal issues with food - assuming you don't have one already.  There's nothing about 'hoping and hoping and hoping' that's going to keep you on track after surgery.  You will encounter temptation and as long as you're unnecessarily elevating certain foods on this pedastal, you're going to have problems with them in the future.

HAHAHAHA @ BLACK LEATHER ANALYZING EVERY WORD...

You both should have cookie parties at this point defending the same food.
I wish my therapist could read this. Infact, I will print this for my bariatric options class for others to see....  I will get some feedback from them.   I will also print this for my Therapist.

Thank you both so much so i can see the behavior and attitude I really dont want to be anymore.

I think all my bariatric friends, the counslors at my bariatric support group will get a kick out of this in our next meeting.

Also, I would love to see my therapist reactions when I print both your faces and have her read ALL THESE COMMENTS>.....

Thank you for putting me down ( a newcomer)   I consider this abuse and do not have to participate in this any longer.

Also thank you for this print out so I can take this back to my bariatric support group and have some time with this review and perhaps some laughs.  

AND I will take this to my surgeon next week...  but he may not have time for this nonsense...  giggles.

I see having chocolate balls and cookies are your motto.

I still say why try it?  and I never said I wouldnt.....   know the difference. :)

how about I get you a more recent picture I'm down 15 more pounds since that picture was taken.   would you like a full length pic of me in my size 10 LBD?  btw that size ten is before plastics.... the doc says I will go down two more sizes after my plastics.... so it would be a size 6 except for the skin that used to encase the extra 136 pounds I carrired around.

you take this to your group and your surgeon and your therapist and you try to get your feelings and needs and opinions validated.

ask them how much of a failure we are... because at less than 2 years out I am sure I will show some regain eventually.  and that's fine caues my husband says I'm too thin now.. he says I'm skin and bones...

Oh, please do!!

Hi there, crazy woman's surgeon and therapist!  Be happy your patient didn't pick the RNY!!!  Hope you're doing well, and hey, 60+ pounds in just over three months isn't bad, eh?  Go, go, gadget DS!

The evil deity of Weight Loss deemed "Thou Shalt Dump" and alas, my ability to eat cookies and cake was forfeit. They make me dump in larger quantities than 1/2 child size serving.

*kicking the evil Weight Loss Deity*

Those were my faves.

I agree though, that it seems silly to say that most people can't just have one cookie. I certainly can, because two make me dump, and three make me wish I was dead. I can also have only ONE spoon of ice cream, because frankly I was never fond of cold consumables of any type.... including ice cream.

Happily my demons aren't everyone's demons, particularly, the OPs demons aren't everyone's demons.