Jealous friends?

I had surgery 6 weeks ago....I had 2 best friends and we were all inseparable.(They aren't overweight either)  Since my surgery I have only seen/spoken to them each once! They refused to mention anything about me losing 45 pounds pretty much overnight and were complaining that I couldn't go out to eat at Chili's!!  Is this jealousy or what is happening here?

a change in lifestyle can be shocking, but if they're real friends they'll adjust to the new you, if not, well, they are not worth your time.

OHHHH YESS....I am 7 weeks out and have realized who my real friends are. The people I assumed would be super supportive of me...aren't. It is extremely difficult right now, because I feel like I have NO friends. Most of my "friends" are MO like I am...and I KNOW they are jealous of me losing weight so quickly...but it is NOT easy. About a week ago one of my "friends" complained to me that it isn't fair that I lost 50 pounds so fast...the thing is..she doesn't realize how difficult this whole experience is. After she finally came to see me and saw how little I can eat and the pain I was in when I ate too much...she took back what she said. It took awhile, but at least one of them had some sense knocked back in them. HA

My best friend since I was 12 and I use to talk everyday. Then I had my surgery and was losing weight, and she does not talk to me much at all anymore. Meaning like once a month if that. I was always the fat friend and now she is and I do not think that she likes that. I said something about going to our 15 year class reunion (her and her husband both graduated with me) so that I could see people and see how many would not recognize me and her hubby said oh you just want to go so people can see how much weight you lost and how fat we have gotten. Which when I said that, that was not my intention, cause I did not look at them as being heavy cause neither of them really are. And when I say that she is the fat friend, meaning that she is bigger then me and she cannot stand it.

I also have another friend that is "thick" and me and her mom have both had RNY and we will get to talking about weight and sizes and so forth and she will say, if you are going to talk about that stuff, then you need to go somewhere else, cause I do not want to hear it.

SO I would say that both of those friends are jealous and neither of them will go out with me anymore in public. They both used to want to go all the time, and now, they don't want to go at all. That is ok, I was never the going out type anyways. And men aren't attracted to me, the way they are to them. I wish they were but they are not.

That is so unfortunate to hear. It is sad that it comes down to people who you thought were your closest friends acting this way. When you talked to your friend about once a month was she supportive at all? (Obviously before the class reunion thing) I have always been "the fat friend" and I think that is intimidating to them. I was SO happy to see them and it was so sad to see that they weren't happy to see me.

She does not mention my weighloss any more.  She did at first when I was still heavier then her, but now that I am smaller then her, she does not say a word and I don't either.  I am not going to dare say anything to either friend about getting plastics, that will really through them over the edge.  And we have not went to our reunion yet and they said that they won't go.  Go figure.

I'll bet you men are attracted to you,you are just missing the signals!
When you've been heavy so long and are used to being treated like a non-person,it's hard to know when guys are checking you out.You better bet that your so-called friends are noticing the" guy-tention" you are getting now!!They are used to being the ones getting all the play.Now there is a new player on the field.
Success brings out the worst and best in people.Your friends are showing the worst.The best is yet to come!!!
Do your thing,shake your shimmy,and live YOUR life.Real friends will come.

They also both only came to the hospital for an hour out of the 5 days I was there and that was when I was coming out of recovery (crying, yelling profanity, throwing up, more crying.) I assured them I was still the same person but I suppose that hasn't set it with them. It's unfortunate because as far as friends go, I have always said "quality over quantity." Plus, it's much harder going through this hard process with out them.  I would never wish this upon anyone but I'm relieved to know I'm not the only one.

Sounds like a bit of jealosy is coming into play for sure. Were they supportive of you having the surgery before you had it done? Maybe they just don't know what to say or how to react around you now. Who knows whats going on in their minds...but if they don't come around then they aren't the kind of friendships you want/need anyway. Hang in there!

keep up the great work.. i have found when you have a life changing experience.. the truth is reveled who our real friends are.. sad but true.. i have gone trough so many friends and family member..

however i understand people just like to see other as unhappy as they are.. so just keep doing hat you are doing ..