Devastated

I guess something like this causes us to re-define "oldest and dearest FRIEND."  A true friend would have never said these hurtful things, ESPECIALLY after the fact (post-surgery).

We often outgrow (for lack of a better word) our "oldest" friends for a reason.  Sometimes we grow in maturity and they do not.

She quacks like a duck and probably has been quacking like a duck for a while, you just didn't hear her before.  But, yeah...unfortunately, she's a duck.

-Cynthia 

You are curing your obesity...now just how will she remedy her ignorance?! On the real though...I hope you are supplementing with more than just a multivitamin. You should also be taking Iron, Calcium w/Vit D, and B-12...AT LEAST.

I talked to my surgeon about this before my surgery.  He told me to just take a multi-vitamin until my 3 month checkup.  At that point he will check my levels and tell me if I need to add anything.  He stated that not all WLS patients need to take all of those supplements.  As soon as he tells me to start I will though...most definitely

Oh Michael.  I'm so very sorry.    {{{HUG}}} 

In Mary Catherine's defense, she said her uncle had died.  I'm assuming from complications after surgery?  She probably feels anger and bitterness because of that. 

It doesn't help that someone we love dearly doesn't support us.  It's one of the negative sides of our choice to have surgery. 

Once she sees how healthy and happy you are in the months to come, I hope she changes her opinion. 

Looking forward to hearing how you are doing.  I hope you're feeling better soon and aren't so sore.

****** She is your friend ...... do you want to keep her friendship? If yes, send her some literature to educate her. Let her know the facts. Heck, even if you don't want to keep her friendship send her some literature to educate her. It will help someone else. Millie

If she's truly his friend, she would educate herself without him having to try to do it for her. We have enough to worry about with our own health.  These nay sayers can go get their own education. They either support us or they don't.  Mary Catherine doesn't sound like the type who'd even read the literature, and it puts the burden on Michael.  She can go pound salt.

Hi Michael, I am sorry you have been hurt by your friend. I agree with all of posts that said that she does not understand Obesity at all - along with the addiction to food. I am proud of you for having the surgery- it is one of the hardest things I ever had to do and it is scary because of the risks and changes that will be made. The good thing is the benifits outweigh everything else, and it was a risk I was willing to take to have a better quailty of life- regardless of adding years to me life- whitch I do believe it does- because I wanted to feel good and not have pain. I feel amazing and I am so glad I did this- I was a year out on May 4, 2008. I have lost 141 pounds so far. Keep your Chin up Brother and just focus on the positives. It will be a struggle sometimes, but Hebrews 12:11 say's this " No disapline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of rightousness and peace for those that have been trained by it." I will be praying for you - God Bless! Faith

I just stumbled across this and it REALLY pissed me off! I know she is your friend but what a *****!  My motto lately is misery loves company.  She is negative.  I have not even had surgery and I am getting the same horse ****AND from my fat friends!!  Go figure. 

If you are seeking 100% support from your oldest and dearest friends, please be aware that you are not likely to find it. Many of us lost friends over our WLS.  My closest friend went completely wacky on me, and I had to cut her off.  I don't know what caused it, and I don't really care.  I was still the same, but she just got so negative about everything I cut ties with her. Most people have zero idea what causes obesity or what to do about it.  We who have had WLS know how cruel the process of losing weight and trying to keep it off can be.  Mary Catherine obviously has no clue.  She doesn't sound like a very good friend, but that's just my observation.  If she can't at least be supportive, then you may need to detach from her if it's her opinion that you value.  Honestly, she sounds rather narrow-minded, so this might be your cue to find another friend. Sorry.  I just call them like I see them.

Oh man that sucks!  Everyone knows someone who knows someone who died.  And they use that to tell you that they know everything about the surgery that you had because you're fat and lazy and never gave a thought to eating better and exercising.  AS IF!!  I'm sorry this happened to you.  Hopefully, she will come around and still be your friend.  If not, doesn't sound like much of a loss.  Women who use their looks to get by in life and don't have much between their ears can be really ugly people. Linda