On/Off Topic..New beginings and second chances???? Maybe Thirds.

New begining and second chances maybe thirds???? Who knows?,  ok hear goes, I've been avoiding posting about this because my feelings have been so crazy and today I had a revelation.  5 years ago I had an MRI that came back saying I had a brain tumor and then after my doctor met with me and my husband and signed us up for emergency brain surgery, they came back and said it was a mistake.  We went on to see a Neurologist that agreed it was an error in the MRI.  I have the report that states initially a promenient mass was found and after the constrast it wasn't seen.  Yada yada.   Ok so after that I go on to have all the weird symtoms and 5 years later (a few weeks ago) I go back in for another MRI and get not so good results.  It states I do have a cyst in the same area and also a chiari malformation.  So I am waiting to see a neurologist to find out if something has to be done or is everthing ok.

So the thing is, after the first time I knew God had preformed a miracle and I never doubted that.  And then I find out about this time and I have really been questioning things.  See, after the first time my life really changed. I am a better mother, wife and friend than I used to be.  I really put my priorities in their place and my life has been better.  So now time 2.... I am thinking what in the world is going on.  Why is this happening, would God even perform another miracle for me and I don't even deserve it.  Which I know sounds weird because I don't believe we can earn a miracle.  Because my wls has been going terrible, I am not doing right I can't help but think maybe this is to get my attention about taking better care of myself. So that was my revelation for the day.  I'm not sure what the outcome will be for my brain issues but I am surely trying to do better for my wls.  Any thoughts on what you all think??

Man, when I think about all my new beginnings. Let me give you a few examples:

1. Husband died at 45 with heart attack. God was with me and gave me peace from the very moment Wesley died. I don't know why but He did it.
2. Met and fell in love with a wonderful man who after we became engaged, had a massive heart attack and died. Again, God's peace overwhelmed me and I knew that I would be ok. I allowed God to begin to mold me into a better person.
3. My daughter tells me at 16 that she is pregnant and doesn't want to marry the father. I have a beautiful grandson that has my heart in the palm of his hand. My daughter did marry the father about 2 months before Austin was born. We now have little Peyton in the family and I am so blessed.
4. 2007 I meet Mr. Wonderful (Leo) and God gives me my song back.
5. 2008 I develop breast cancer. Once again that peace that no man can give. I've finally been able to start sharing my testimony and it blesses me more than those that hear it.

I don't know why God wraps His arms around me and protects me from the hurt, the pain, the sadness, the depression BUT HE DOES. Oh sure, I have bad days but when I look at back at my life and some of the things I've been through - I ought to be on drugs or something. LOL It's His grace that has protected and been a shield to me.

I once stood up in a church service where people were sharing their testimony and I told the people that I had questioned God about not having a testimony to share. I mean there were folks there that had been delivered from drugs, alcohol, sexual sins, etc. and I had not done any of that. That's when God revealed to me that I had an even BETTER testimony because I had NOT given in to those temptations and had kept my life clean. Wow!!! The full impact of that hit me and I realized how great my testimony is.

Anyway, I just wonder what God has up his sleeve for me next??? What a journey but what an even better ending will take place.

Blessings,
DebbieDoo
4.

thanks so much for sharing DebbieDoo.  I enjoyed that so much.  Blessings to you.