Sad News

entertainment community. The Pillsbury Doughboy died

yesterday of a yeast infection and trauma complications from

repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.

Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens
 of

celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs.

Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty

Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch. The grave

site was piled high with flours.

Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described

Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was
 kneaded.

Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life

was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very

smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked

schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times, he still was

a crusty old man and was considered a positive roll model

for millions.

Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, three

children: John Dough, Jane Dough and Dosey Dough, plus they

had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly

father, Pop Tart.

The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.