How do we address someone's weight as an issue?

I have to say the past year, reserching WLS and finally having it one weekago, it has all been such a possitive change for me. I find myself checking this website everyday, i read as many profiles as i can, because i want to get to know everyone. What I have discovered since i started looking into WLS and having it done is that some ppl just don't know that they are eating themselves to death! I have a friend, and this friend weighs well over 500lb. But they don't see it as unhealthy. And OMG this person can eat!! I just don't know how to address this to the person. I have said "oh i wish you wouldn't eat like that here at my house, we have made healthy changes here with what we eat." But the person will just pull out food they have in their car (try a nice selction of Hungry Man Tv dinners) and other family sized food items for just theirself. Any suggestions how i can tactfully talk to this person about their weight withput looking like a mean know it all? I am always gonna be greatfull to the friend of mine who told me that i should explore WLS, not because they thought bad of me, but because they loved me and wanted me around for a long time. Any ideas???

Hi Tanya. I know what you mean about about brining up the weight issue with someone. I myself am heavy and checking into wls, but my 27 yr old daughter is also heavy. She is very stubborn and feels that her weight is not a problem, but her son is 8 and weighs about 120 pounds. When I try to talk to her about all of this she gets really angry, but I will not stop trying for her and my grandson.

Just a few thoughts - first of all we've all been there. I doubt very much if those people are oblivious to their weight issues, but if they acknowledged it was a problem, they'd have to get into their old cycle of trying to do something about it and failing. You can only fail so many times - I've been there - most of you have been too. I also know that the more people tried to preach to me or get me to do something about it when I wasn't ready, I'd just dig my heals in more. In fact it would turn me toward food to comfort myself. So "confronting" people or nagging them doesn't help them. My best friend sat me down one day and told me how much her and her kids loved me and wanted me around for a long time. She said she was worried about my health and hoped I would find something that would work for me because she was so concerned. She saw me go thru the ups and downs of many diets and cheered me on and supported me, but never nagged or preached. That was years ago. She's the first person I called when I made the decision to have WLS. She's absolutely thrilled. It had to be my decision to do something - not someone else's. For me, and I know a lot of people nagging doesn't work, it only hurts. I think you just sit your friend down and tell them the things you said at the end of you posting and let them know that you'll always be there for them whatever they feel they must do. Don't judge, just love, Gail