Livin' in Washinton - off topic but funny
THIS IS WHAT JEFF FOXWORTHY HAS TO SAY ABOUT LIVIN' in Washington State! IT IS ALL TRUE!
If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don't work
there, you live in Washington.
If you've worn shorts, sandals and a parka at the same time, you live
in Washington.
If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed the wrong
number, you live in Washington.
If you measure distance in hours, you live in Washington.
If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C' and back again in the same day, you live
in Washington.
If you install security lights on your house and garage but leave both doors unlocked live in Washington.
If you can drive 75 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, you live in Central, Southern or Eastern Washington.
If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a 2 layers of clothes
or under a raincoat, you live in Washington.
If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow and ice, you
live in Washington.
If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter, and road
construction, you live in Washington.
If you feel guilty throwing aluminum cans or paper in the trash, you live in
Washington.
If you know more than 10 ways to order coffee, you live in Washington.
If you know more people who own boats than air conditioners, you live in
Washington.
If you stand on a deserted corner in the rain waiting for the "Walk"
signal, you live in Washington.
If you consider that if it has no snow or has not recently erupted, it is not a real mountain, you live in Washington.
If you can taste the difference between Starbucks, Seattle's Best, and Dutch Bros,
you live in Washington.
If you know the difference between Chinook, Coho and Sockeye salmon, you live in
Washington.
If you know how to pronounce Sequim, Puyallup, Abiqua, Issaquah, Oregon, Umpqua, Yakima and Willamette, you live in Washington.
If you consider swimming an indoor sport, you live in Washington.
If you can tell the difference between Japanese, Chinese and Thai food, you live
in Washington.
If you never go camping withou****erproof matches and a poncho, you live in
Washington.
If you have actually used your mountain bike on a mountain, you live in
Washington.
If you think people who use umbrellas are either wimps or tourists, you live in
Washington.
If you buy new sunglasses every year, because you cannot find the old ones after
such a long time, you live in Washington.
If you actually understand these jokes and forward them to all your Washington
friends, you live or have lived in Washington.
If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don't work
there, you live in Washington.
If you've worn shorts, sandals and a parka at the same time, you live
in Washington.
If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed the wrong
number, you live in Washington.
If you measure distance in hours, you live in Washington.
If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C' and back again in the same day, you live
in Washington.
If you install security lights on your house and garage but leave both doors unlocked live in Washington.
If you can drive 75 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, you live in Central, Southern or Eastern Washington.
If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a 2 layers of clothes
or under a raincoat, you live in Washington.
If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow and ice, you
live in Washington.
If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter, and road
construction, you live in Washington.
If you feel guilty throwing aluminum cans or paper in the trash, you live in
Washington.
If you know more than 10 ways to order coffee, you live in Washington.
If you know more people who own boats than air conditioners, you live in
Washington.
If you stand on a deserted corner in the rain waiting for the "Walk"
signal, you live in Washington.
If you consider that if it has no snow or has not recently erupted, it is not a real mountain, you live in Washington.
If you can taste the difference between Starbucks, Seattle's Best, and Dutch Bros,
you live in Washington.
If you know the difference between Chinook, Coho and Sockeye salmon, you live in
Washington.
If you know how to pronounce Sequim, Puyallup, Abiqua, Issaquah, Oregon, Umpqua, Yakima and Willamette, you live in Washington.
If you consider swimming an indoor sport, you live in Washington.
If you can tell the difference between Japanese, Chinese and Thai food, you live
in Washington.
If you never go camping withou****erproof matches and a poncho, you live in
Washington.
If you have actually used your mountain bike on a mountain, you live in
Washington.
If you think people who use umbrellas are either wimps or tourists, you live in
Washington.
If you buy new sunglasses every year, because you cannot find the old ones after
such a long time, you live in Washington.
If you actually understand these jokes and forward them to all your Washington
friends, you live or have lived in Washington.