I need real straight talk advice.

I'm a 46 y/o female- sleeved 3 yrs ago. Lost a lot- very happy- never made it under 200 though... I'm trying mentally to find the mindset to go full speed back into the dieting. I work f/t m-f and i have at least 40 to go (according to me) to be back in that "happy place". I have come a long way- but I've been stuck. I havent gained since surgery (but i can see how easy it is) - how did you guys find/keep your motivation?

I feel like i must have been a sloth in my past life. I am truly lazy- and I'm just feeling really bad about myself. I just want the will to exercise more, and basically not eat the crap that has been keeping me from losing. 40 lbs seems so daunting- and meanwhile I keep reading over and over again how people make this tweak- or that tweak and they shed 20 lbs like that.....arrg I'm jealous of that. I've made all of my tweaks- i drink black coffee- no cream ever. No soda ever. No booze. No bread...mostly. But- i do have fistfuls of chips- and other crap- never enough to gain (but again, no loss).

Any inspiring thoughts? Blogs? your story? Other's stories? I didnt come this far...to only come this far.

Any words of advice are always appreciated- XO

Do you track your food ? A handful of chips or whatever you choose to snack could be more of a culprit than you think? Have you tried the 5 day reset ? It could help you get back on track and get rid of the carb and/or sugar cravings. Good luck to you. I hope you find what works for you.

The five-day reset is complete bunk. It's just a fad diet that keeps you from getting back to the habits that made you successful in the first place.

If you really want to do a mental "reset," try doing AMAW (all meat all week) and doing nothing but lean, dense protein. No veggies, no carbs, just protein-forward like you did soon out of surgery.

while exercise is healthy overall, it has nothing to do with weight loss.

i lost 122# and have maintained the loss with NO exercise,at all, for 9 years.

It is about what we choose to put in our mouths. The chips etc are keeping you in maintenance mode, not loss mode.

All I can say is you have to want to lose more than you want to eat chips.

You will have to go cold turkey and the first week will be hell but after that it is easier.

Put it all the cream you want in your coffee. It is carbs that are the enemy, not fat. Fat is satiating, filling.

Est high protein , high fat and less than 30 carbs a day. You will lose the weight you want to lose. 800 caps a day, all the sf cal free liquid you can hold.

Good luck!

Maybe try limiting your cheat day to 1 or 2 days a week? Every other day you have discipline. You never go over your calories. I'd tell you what I do but since you eat "chips and other crap" You probably wouldn't like that much. I don't eat refined carbs or refined sugars at all..not even on cheat days. For me that's my saving grace. On my cheat days nuts, cheese, meat are my chips..and I don't allow nuts on non cheat days. If i allow cheese on non cheat days it's severely limited.(like a sprinkling of shredded cheese at a meal) And Meat is always weighed out on non cheat days.

It sounds like you might benefit from working with a therapist to address whatever is going on in your brain that's causing you to do things that you know are unhealthy for your body.

I had the very same issue. I tried and tried to get back on track, without success. I finally decided to go back to the surgeon's office, and meet with the doctor and nutritionist. I've had monthly follow-up visits with the nutritionist, who is a gem. I've finally made it to Onederland-- my current goal is 175. Down from 237 in January. The accountability has really helped me.

Well done, so proud of you, Mary, you're an inspiration!!!

One thing that's really helped me to exercise more is finding something I don't hate doing. For years, I tried to make myself go jogging, but I HATE running! After surgery, I started riding my bike, and discovered that I both enjoy it and I'm not terrible at it. Right after surgery I could ride a mile or two, and by the time I hit my goal weight I did a 40 mile race!

I also do a lot of swimming and go to the pool at the gym several nights a week. I have a waterproof MP3 player and I will swim 50 laps or more in a session. I think it's very relaxing and I actually look forward to it.

As others have said, though, weight loss is 80% diet and 20% exercise. Start weighing, measuring, and logging your food to make sure you're staying at an appropriate calorie level for weight loss.

At one time (actually 2 times) I regained app 30-35 lbs. To lose that - I had to become really serious about losing. Not "If" not "Tomorrow", or "Monday", etc.

Determination was a key. And I was doing if for me. Knowing that it would take weeks, months even, to lose the regain.

I imidiately recognized what were we downfalls. Alcohol, snacking, desserts, and not having really good food when I was hungry.

Plus - anxiety and depression. I got help from my doc, accepting that I need his help. I got medication to help me deal with anxiety. Finding something that works for me was important.

I gave up alcohol, completely. Alcohol = empty calories, ability to eat more food, ability to tolerate foods that otherwise I couldn't digest with my post op RNY configuration, plus after drinking, or while drinking, my dedication to follow proper diet was not as strong as without it.

Then was just planning and patience. Because I didn't gained the weight in a month, and realistically, I knew losing 1 lb a week was doable. But that meant that losing 30-40 lbs would take me app 30-40 weeks. My realistic goals were losing 4-5 lbs per month. Ideally - I wanted to lose 7-10 lbs per month. But to allow long term success - I was happy if lose 4-5 lbs.

Initially 10 lbs just vanished in less than a month, when I cleaned my diet, started low carb diet. But I knew losing 10 lbs a month as I would get close to my goal was very unlikely. And as I got closer to my goal, I was happy with just a couple of lbs loss.

Setting my goal and not settling in a middle, or 10 lbs from it. Not giving up when I was close enough to my goal that most of my "goal sized" clothes were fitting nicely, and friends noticed changes in my weight. Being dedicated at that point was really critical. Keep working on it. The first time I gained and was losing, I was stuck at 10 lbs above my goal because I was complacent, and it got so much harder to keep losing. Losing last 10 lbs took me then close to a year.

Not the second time around.

Good luck.

And BTW - I gain weight when I start serious exercise, I don't lose weight. When I exercised with a Personal Trainer to gain muscles, my appetite was much higher, and I gained more than just muscles. For me - losing weight without exercise is much better that working out like crazy. My BS can get really low when I exercised, so I had to increase carbohydrates to prevent or correct Hypoglycemia (Low BS).