BMI is 75

You're absolutely correct I don't eat 1200 calories a day. However I normally try to stay between 2500 to 3000 calories. I've never been one to do a yo-yo type of diet. I respect your opinion but to say to me that I'm not ready if I wasn't I wouldn't be up here trying to get advice but thanks in advance have a good day.

WLS is not magic; it is a tool that helps you lose weight. If you do not follow the guidelines and change your behavior, you will not lose weight or reach your goal.

If you're not ready to change your behavior, including realizing why you are obese and how your own attitudes and actions have caused that, you are not ready for surgery.

I used to eat around 3000 kcal/day when I weighed over 300 lbs. It seemed like a pretty normal amount of food to me. Indeed - there are active males who can pack away 3000 calories no problem. It's very easy to do - my standard breakfast was a big breakfast smoothie loaded with fruit and either Greek yogurt or soft tofu plus enough milk or orange juice to get it going in the blender. Nutritious, yes - but probably 600 calories. Then I'd maybe have a sandwich for lunch - often with chips and/or a couple of cookies. Maybe some nuts for snacks - or a scone or muffin with a cup of coffee. A standard dinner - not huge - but often with a second helping of something. Just doing a quick calculation in my head (and of course it would depend on what's in the sandwich and what I was eating for dinner), that would put you in the 2500-3000 kcal range pretty easily. And that didn't seem outrageous to me at all - it's not like I was downing a dozen donuts or eating a large pizza every day. BUT....given that I now maintain on 1500-1700 kcal, what I was eating was twice as much as I needed.

I used to observe my female co-workers eating lunch in the break room before I had WLS. Yes - there were a couple who could pack away a lot of food - but I suspect they were really active (and one, I know, was very tall (maybe 6') and muscular). That makes a difference. Most of them would eat these little tiny lunches - like a thing of yogurt and half a bagel. Or a standard-size turkey or tuna sandwich (sometimes half of one) and an apple. I started to realize that most women actually eat this way. And now, I have to eat that way, too, unfortunately...and some of us on here have to eat even less to maintain.

Weight loss surgery gives you an opportunity to lose your excess weight - usually a year or so. During that time, you'll hopefully adopt a lifestyle change of healthy eating, small portions and exercise.

Some of us do that, with some success, and maintain our weightloss for many years. Sadly, the vast majority of people, regain anything up to and past their starting weight. The statistics for our success are definitely NOT in our favour. In fact, they are pretty horrendous.

I know I upset you with my comment and believe me, I'm not saying this to be an ass, but if you are not able to recognize how you got to be 460lb and what it's going to take for you to lose 300lbs and maintain that loss for the rest of your life, you are not ready for surgery.

Doctors are a business. Most of them will operate on you and take the $40k, without much thought on how YOU are going to manage this massive body change for the next 20, 30, 40 years.

PCOS can make it difficult to lose weight, but it can be done. Also, most PCOS patients do not gain 300 pounds. You have to be overeating to gain that much weight.

You say that you have always been overweight and come from a family of obese individuals. That tells me that maybe you have a skewed view of how much you are actually eating. When I had surgery I was shocked at how little food the human body needs to thrive. I was so used to eating a full plate if food (or 3) that it seemed like "normal" to me. I saw others eating more food than I was eating...so that meant that I was not overeating...right?

Well...not really. Average meal should be about 600 calories each. That brings you to 1800 calories. Measure out a 600 calorie meal and see just how small that looks. Obese people do not have an accurate view on portion size. You might be eating one meal a day...but that meal could be over 2000 calories, then add high calorie drinks and snacks and you're up to 4000 calories in no time. Restaurant meals are 3 times the portion size that we should be eating.

You say that you are not overeating...then why are you looking into a surgery that restricts the size of your stomach so you can't overeat? It does not make sense.

Getting the head stuff right is the hardest part of having surgery. You need to be totally honest with yourself on how you became obese. PCOS plays into your weight gain, but there is more to the story...

Thanks for replying you're right that portion our big problem. That is something that I'm realizing that I need to work on as well. However it sounds to me from a lot of people that have responded to me so far. What is the reason for having surgery if all you have to do is only eat 1200 calories a day. Obviously the only thing that the surgery may do is not allow you to consume as much due to the fact you only have such a small capacity to fill. And I understand that everyone is saying that you have to get your mind to a particular place to do this. So if it's so simple to only eat such a small amount then why is everyone having surgery.

In the early days post op, most folks are actually eating only 400 calories per day. Once you're all healed up, it's more like 600 - 800 calories per day for weight loss, and around 1000 to maintain.

It is far easier to stick to this lower-calorie diet when a tiny piece of meat fills you up. Being physically unable to eat like you used to is a big part of it as well-- eating a huge sandwich, or several slices of pizza will LITERALLY make you sick.

WLS also changes your metabolism. Scientists don't totally understand it 100% yet, but your body treats food differently after surgery.

Weight Loss surgeries are not only about portion size, they are metabolic. With VSG one of the main components is it effecting your grehlin- or hunger hormone. In that first year when your new stomach is the smallest and you cannot eat a lot is the time to learn new habits. My surgeon's office always says - the first year is the surgery, but if you want to continue to be a success it is up to you after that. Not that the surgery has no effect after one year, but it gets easier to eat around it. We still have to make a decision to make good choices.

I have been over 400lbs in my life. Going into surgery I was not downing pizzas and half gallons of ice cream...I was eating what I thought was normally, but couldn't lose weight no matter what I did. I chose RNY because I wanted what I considered the advantage of malabsorption to get me on my way. I had a lot to lose and I wasn't sure restriction alone would be enough. I had PCOS, was post-menopausal, and have hypothyroid, I still was able to lose the weight with surgery.

I do feel I have had a metabolic reset, I now have a chance at keeping the weight off. It is still hard work, but I am doing it.

I never thought I was overeating, either. WLS really opened my eyes. Now, in maintenance, I can maintain my weight on 1500-1700 kcal/day (which, I might add, is generous compared to a lot of other female WLS patients in maintenance). It always floors me how little food that actually is. I can get up to 1500-1700 kcal in no time...I have to really watch it and spread it out over the course of the day so I don't inadvertently go over. It is SO EASY to do!

On one hand you say you come from an obese family....are the men obese too? Many women on these boards suffer from PCOS, but have been successful in losing weight and maintaining their loss.

Most of us here have been obese for most of our lives, and the surgery has given us a tool to help lose weight....but we also have to take responsibility for weight loss by weighing and measuring our food, tracking everything in myfitnesspal or baritastic, and staying within our programs' guidelines. Do it = success. Don't do it = failure.

Only you have control over your body. You may suffer from PCOS and/or have "the fat gene".....but if you're determined to be successful, you will be. For me, it's a struggle every day. But I try to take responsibility for my choices. I haven't reached goal yet, but I'm getting closer, and I never give up.

It won't be easy, but it's doable. Best of luck to you.