Watcha Eating VSGer's Wednesday, January 9th 2019

Good morning! I hope everyone is doing well this fine Wednesday!

It is my father's 75th birthday today. The Powerball drawing is tonight, so I sent him some lottery tickets hoping it will bring him luck on his B-day. I asked to let me know if he wins:-) He came out of retirement about 8 years ago and still works everyday as a Hazmat Inspector. He also hikes all the time, high elevations at age 75. I admire him and love him, but we don't really like each other very much. I feel like he has been disappointed in me since 1996.

QOTD-How do you forgive someone who has hurt you in the past? I know this is a heavy question, but it being my father's B-day, I am a little melancholic:-)

I feel like I have forgiven him, but have never told him so. I think there is a part of me that is still holding on to the anger.

B-1/3 cup granola, coffee

L-Flax porridge with coconut milk and pecans

S-Hot tea, jerky or string cheese

D-Baked cod, 1/2 sweet potato

E-Walk with Emmy

Have a safe and peaceful Wednesday!

Sorry I didn't reply yesterday! Where is everyone?!

Why do you think that you dad's been disappointed in you since 1996?

I disappointed my parents in 1997 when I dropped out of college and got married. It clouded a lot of our interactions for a number of years. I can't remember when, exactly, things changed, but they did and I'm super grateful for that. It probably took at least 5 years, though. (I don't fault my parents for this. I know they had a vision of who their daughter would become and it's hard to change your vision that's had 20 years to solidify on a dime.)

Yesterday went well. I went to pilates class and that was great. It's nice to feel like I'm back in the swing of things. I had a long list of things to accomplish today - my main tasks were to read all the information I've received about my required internship and delve into my HMGT class a bit. The HMGT class is Research and Data Analysis in Health Care so requires the use of some statistical analysis packages that I wanted to install prior to class starting to make sure I know how to use them. The class intro said to expect the installation to take "several hours." It took about 15 minutes.

QOTD: Interesting question. I think it depends on the hurt? I also don't have any great attachment to the concept of forgiveness. I actually looked forgive up - "stop feeling angry or resentful." There are things that are unforgivable - I'll never forgive my abusive ex for example. I've also never forgiven Art's parents for the way they treated me before we got married and the first 7-8 years after. I'll always hold some resentment about that.

So.. I don't know. If something is forgivable, it normally just takes time and internal dialog to change my thoughts about the offense/person. Not a super clear answer, sorry.

1: protein shake
2: leftover tuna green bean salad
3: some crazy ass dinner with a billion components. The name of the recipe is innocent sounding - "white wine braised short ribs." But the actual recipe includes braised short ribs, green onion gremolata, balsamic-mustard marinaded root vegetables, and creamy white cheddar polenta. It'll be time consuming, but it's my last chance to go all out with cooking before classes start up on Monday so it's worth it.

liquid and vites: on track
exercise: pilates class!