Rejected

Hi everyone.

Well...the last word is in and it's final. I will not be allowed to have VSG.

During my psych evaluation, I mentioned that when I get clinically depressed, I lose interest in eating. I learned long ago to put myself on scheduled feedings and hydration. I actually set the timer on the oven and when it buzzes, I bring myself to the table and have a well balanced meal. I walk around with a cup of water and sip that along with refills all day. It works for me. It supports my brain and my clinical depression gets better. I think it would have worked very well for post-VSG. But, the eval-psychologist stated that this was "emotional eating". My psychiatrist, whom I trust, favored the eval-psychologist's words "emotional eating" and recommended, twice no less, that I contact my therapist to get my "emotional eating" "resolved" before I may be reevaluated for VSG...with the same psychologist....which is "not by the hair of my chinny-*****hin"!

So...I'm very sad, very frustrated, very angry, but also very done...in. I'm 66 years old and this was my window of opportunity. There just don't seem to be any options left, except to flee to Mexico (which is way-over-the-top scary to me). My husband and I will continue on the pre-surgery diet that we picked up at the bariatric orientation (calorie, fat, carbohydrate, protein, fiber-counting - 1200 Cal.). I've lost 15 lbs. in 30 days. It's working, so this has not been a total loss.

I've asked my therapist to call me tomorrow so that I can work through my feelings. Perhaps there is yet another chapter in my VSG journey that is yet to be told.

I love this supportive group at OH. Keep up the good work!

I am sorry Snuzy. I can imagine the disappointment after being rejected. Talking with your regular therapist will be helpful and honestly I'm not sure why you had to seek an outside source for your evaluation when you already had the therapist and a doctor, it makes no sense to me, but then again most insurance requirements don't.

Keep your chin up and keep coming here. The VSG diet is hard without the vsg, so please make sure to keep your faith and eat healthily for both your body and mind.

I am so sorry for you. I have not had surgery yet and I feel your frustrations. My issues were more about money but I get it. If Mexico is your only option I know 2 people personally in my real life with major success going to Mexico, a close relative being one. If you bring someone you trust and do your research Mexico isn't too scary.

Is there another clinic/hospital you could try?

My therapist once told me that he has never met anyone who permanently was "rejected." And that people who are "delayed" in this way should embrace that there is a reason for pause. He expressed that some people get very upset initially, but in the end they understood it to be the best thing for them (to address other underlying issues that would most definitely get in the way). He told me/us (and the group - as he was speaking as a speaker to our support group at the time - not as my therapist) that the only people who get rejected officially are people who are institutionalized - since food choices are not able to be made. So it's impossible to eat appropriately - they tend to eat all that is available, which leads to failure. Rather than feeling more sad - why not focus on how to address the underlying concerns with the direction of eventually getting approved. You say the final word is in, but then say you will be up for VSG reevaluation. Focus on that and keep losing in the meantime. Good luck.

Thank you all so much for your kind words.

The evaluating psychologist actually tried to tip me off concerning the situation with the surgeons' group. She quietly told me at the end of the interview; "You know, not all the surgeons are on board with these types of diagnoses". I think I'll count her a friend for warning me about that. I was just so slow on the uptake. She was unnecessarily rough on me during the evaluation and apologized to me afterwards, but she kept repeating "I had to do it...I know it's hard". Though it's hard to conscience, in her mind, she really thought she was carrying out the wishes of her surgeons' group. And she probably was. My psychiatrist is required to support his colleague and respect what she wrote into the health record of the interview. I think my best course is to just move on now.

When some people get clinically depressed, they try to comfort themselves with food and wind up gaining a lot of weight. I'm just the opposite and lose my appetite instead. It all tastes bland. There are no flavors, no aromas, no hot, no cold, no crispy, no salty, no sweetness, no savory, no colors, just black, white and gray, no hunger...just food that I'm truly not interested in at all; lumps on a plate. I'm able to lose a lot of weight that way, but it's just not healthy for me to do that. My brain suffers when I'm not nourished and the depression deepens into the deepest, darkest cave one could ever know. And then I can't get out.

What my psychiatrist is suggesting is that I get therapy so that I don't lose my appetite when I get clinically depressed. How do you use CBT for that? Can we train the stripes off a zebra? With WLS, even the medications used to treat mental illness must usually be tinkered with because of the new, small stomach size. It could be dangerous. I could lose my life. The fact is, I can't assure my psychiatrist of anything...instead, I'm pretty sure Depression City is where things would go for me, based on my dx and history. I've a tried and true method for dealing with it, but this isn't good enough to allay his concerns. He's sure that the stress of VSG will destabilize me. He's probably right. I should be thankful for his protectiveness.

This morning I was 3 pounds lighter than yesterday morning. Yaaaay!!!

Your support has meant so much to me. Thank you.