Starting to Slip ~ need Help!

Hello all....it's been a very long time since I have been on here, but I really need help! Lots of stuff has changed in my life and I am feeling a bit out of control. I moved and have an insane commute! I wake up at 4 am - leave at 5 am, take public transportation and arrive back home at 6 pm (work 7:30-4). I go to bed at 8:30 which gives me 2 hours to get what I need to. I try and keep my meals as healthy and as fast as I can but sometimes I slip up or dinner takes too long and I eat too late and don't feel good when going to bed. I have been doing a lot of emotional eating too! Lot of stuff going on.

Bottom line is - my weight is the same BUT I have lost muscle and gained a spare tire. I am too tired to exercise and I am really scared of being 280 again! The last few days no food has sounded good but I know I have to eat - strange, I know.

I know what I should do - exercise - but I am too exhausted! I will be trying to look for a job closer to home, but right now that is not an option. Jobs where I live do not pay as well as the city jobs.

Is there anyone else in my same shoes and can offer me real advice? I know once I find a job closer to home, I will have more time to exercise and plan a bit better. My meals overall are healthy and I try and prep a lot on the weekends to make it faster during the week.

I no longer feel attractive and starting to feel frumpy. I am just feeling like I am starting to roll backwards and I do not want to F-Up! i worked too hard to get to 140 lbs.

Thank you for any advice you can offer.

Okay...there are regain experts here who can chime in. But I do want to say: You have not regained yet. You're still in a good position. You're taking steps to get a new job. Your long commute won't be your reality forever.

1. What kind of work do you do? Are lunch time walks an option? Is a standing desk an option? Are small, strength-training exercises at your desk an option? Are weekend hikes, workouts, etc an option?
2. Sounds like you're still making good food choices. If you feel like your body composition is changing due to not exercising, can you talk to your doc or nut about cutting a few calories?

Finally...I have been in your position. Exhausting job/commute. Too much to do, too little time. It's overwhelming..like you have too many things to fix at once and you're like the little dutch boy trying to stop all the leaks in the dam. Suggest that you break it down into what you can change now. Do what you can to prioritize your health, but know you might not be able to do it all at once. Emotional eating is real and is definitely one of my issues, too (whether coping with something or because of positive emotions associated with eating during certain activities and events). But please do whatever you can so that regain isn't at the top of the list of things you need to worry about. Maybe every time you feel like emotionally eating, you can pop open your lap top and tool on your resume or look for a job?

Hi,

I will be walking more on the weekends - so that is something I can control. My dog has all his shots and I am going to start taking him on hikes. I walk him almost everyday - it is the weights and muscle I do not do anymore.

The job thing will take awhile - the area I live in does not pay well - that is why we all commute to the city :( I may have to change career paths.

Good point on the desk exercises! I do walk on my breaks - and only have a 1/2 hour lunch break. I feel like my head is in the right place, but my hands and mouth are doing something totally wrong.

I think my first step is to get rid of my spare tire, then try and work on the muscle stuff. I feel really squishy and unattractive. I have worked so hard to get to 140 - but the last year has been a real struggle with all the changes.

Thank you for your advice. I also would like to go to meetings... will try and find out where they are in my new neighborhood.

Hi there. I'm still very new at this, and I don't have a killer schedule like you do, but maybe some of my suggestions can help or at least inspire.

You say you take public transportation. Can you get off a few stops sooner and walk the rest of the way? Of course you'll need to take walking shoes with you, but I see a lot of people who do that. That will help you get some exercise in.

During your breaks at work, do some stretching, maybe a little weight training if you can take some weights to work (or even water bottles!), just anything that will stretch your muscles and maybe get your heart rate up.

Can you do most of your meal prep on the weekend? I boil eggs, make sure I have chicken breast and another protein (all I can handle right now is chicken breast and most seafood). I also make sous vide egg cups in my instant pot and they taste even better than the ones at Starbucks. Those would be great to grab for breakfast.

You can package up your lunch items in individual containers and just stick them in lunch bag on your way out the door. I also steam up veggies to have on hand (no crunch for me yet) and have packets of really amazing tuna that I get at Thrive Market. In fact, I get a lot of stuff there, on the cheap! Here's a link to them: http://thrv.me/mMKD6u It's a membership, but the first 30 days are free, and I've already saved far more than the membership fee! Their tuna is amazing, wild caught and all is tested for mercury before it even gets packaged. They have tons of other really good stuff too.

And of course, decent protein bars are always a good back-up. I just discovered the ones from Celebrate and OMG they are so good! I was also quite fond of Quest Bars pre-surgery; I haven't tried them post-surgery yet. My favorite Quest flavors are White Chocolate Raspberry and Cookies and Cream but they have a ton of different ones. You can find them individually at Vitamin Shoppe if you have one in your area. That way you can taste different ones without committing to a whole case (which I've done and turned out to be a big waste). RX bars are good too...but again, I haven't tried them post-op.

If you don't have an Instant Pot, get one! I use it for so much...you can have a fabulous homemade stew or soup in 30 minutes! Nom Nom Paleo has some amazing recipes for the Instant Pot that are quick and easy and great for low carb diets. And you know how damn hard it is to peel boiled eggs? When I make them in the instant pot, the shells practically slide off. And my eggs are super fresh...I have backyard chickens. If I try to boil them in the conventional manner they are nearly impossible to peel and I end up with "Egg Peeling Rage". heehee

Emotional eating...man am I familiar with that one! I've just discovered "Bariatric Mindset" and I'm finding it so helpful and real. The author, Kristin Lloyd, is a psychologist and life coach, and a frequent contributor to articles here at OH. She also weighed 411 lbs five years ago and had the gastric sleeve. She is a normal weight now and maintaining. I love her because she's on this same journey as we are, and her compassion and understanding and empathy really resonates with me. She has a FB group as well (Bariatric Mindset Mavens) and shares really insightful and helpful things there. Her book "Bariatric Mindset" is available on Kindle too, so if you have a Kindle, you could read it during your commute!

Be kind to yourself. What would you tell someone who told you what you've just told us? Would you say she's unattractive and frumpy and destined to regain? Of course you wouldn't. You would encourage her and try to share ways to help her get her head back in the game. Negative self-talk is a serious problem for me...I am incredibly cruel to myself and am learning (through therapy and Bariatric Mindset) to be kinder to me and to utilize positive self-talk rather than negative.

You can do this! You're a Blonde Goddess! You've lost HALF of your weight, so you are definitely a strong, strong woman and you know how to rein yourself in and figure out how to make it work, even with your crazy schedule.

I hope some of this helps. Please stick around and keep posting...as you know, there's a lot of support here, and some really long-term successful and compassionate people here. They will help you.

Take care,

Teresa

Thank you for all your positivity and advice:)

It's great that your meals are healthy and that you're able to prep on weekends!

I actually don't recommend the Instant Pot, since it does one thing well - braise. And I'm not a huge fan of braised meats day in and day out. I do, however, recommend sous vide. It's easy to sous vide meats, especially when you're home on the weekends, but you can also do it at work depending on the sous vide option you go with. Then all you need to do at dinner time is sear your already sous vided meat and enjoy.

As for exercise, I don't know what public transit you're using exactly, but do you have the option of getting on or getting off at a stop that's slightly farther away and walking the extra distance? Can you shower at work? Can you bike to your station?

Oh, I use my Instant Pots for so much more than meat! Yep, that's plural. I love it so much that I bought another smaller one.

At this point, I use mine for curry, broth, and hard boiled eggs.

But I primarily eat meat, so if a tool doesn't work well for meat, it's not the tool for me!

Mmmmm curry! I'm going to have to make some of that when I'm further out. Do you have a good recipe you can share?

Here's the Sous Vide Egg Bites I just made in my Instant Pot.

SOOOOO much better than the over-priced ones they sell at Starbucks and so easy to grab one for and at-work breakfast or lunch.

I do sous vide egg bites in the sous vide :)

I don't have a specific recipe for curry in the instant pot, but this is what I do:

Melt fat then sauté onion, meat, curry paste/powder. (E.g., butter, two chopped up onions, 3-lb chicken cut into bite sized pieces, 4T curry paste, 1T curry powder)

SautÃ****il onions start to soften a bit, meat starts to brown, and everything is well coated in spice.

Add about 1 cup of liquid. (E.g., water, coconut milk, diced tomatoes)

Cover, do the high pressure thing for 8 minutes. 4 minutes natural release followed by quick release for chicken. 8 minutes pressure and straight to quick release for other meats. (The meat should be fully cooked at this point, if it's not, cover and do the pressure thing for 4 minutes more.. or whatever you've found works for you.)

At this point you can switch back to sauté and add in stuff like frozen peas or chick peas.

I also mix in about a cup of something thick (yogurt, coconut milk, tomato pureé) stirred up with 1T of cornstarch for extra thickening. Keep it on sautÃ****il it boils and until anything you just added is as tender as you want it to be, then serve.

Or add in fresh spinach before serving, and stir until it wilts.

It's easy to vary with different curry pastes/powders and finishing liquids (e.g., tomato sauce vs yogurt/coconut milk) and meats/veg/beans.