Portsmouth Naval Hospital?

Anyone have surgery at Portsmouth Naval Hospital?

I have been there. I might have done this 10 or more years ago, but we had two friends - one my wife's maid of honor at our wedding - die from complications following surgery. The best thing (I think) is to educate her about the progress being made, and what the current statistics are for successful surgery.

Statistics are dry and boring though, so if you can find some personal stories from others, that may help you. And in the end, you may need to decide whether or not you can go on with it regardless of her support.

Chances are, at 450-500 lbs, your mother's cousin would have been at risk with any type of surgery... I'd imagine she had to have had several health problems that made her high-risk. At that weight, she probably also had a more complicated, higher-risk surgery to begin with, like gastric bypass or ...omg, it's been so long since I've been here, I forgot what the other one's called! Anyway, do your research and be prepared to show her why the risks of VSG are so much less, especially with a younger person without a bunch of comorbidities. And good luck!

(fwiw, when we got my sons's surgery done, he insisted that we wait til after the fact to tell my parents--his grandparents--to avoid the inevitable freak-out from my mother. It worked, she understood that he didn't want her worrying, his results have been incredible, and she was fully supportive when she didn't have to worry about it ahead of time.)

Most nurses that I know have anxiety when it comes to medical procedures as we are often faced with negative outcomes. Afterall people typically aren't in the hospital because they are well. Anyways, coming from a fellow nurse, I was also petrified, but I went through with it, and so far I've done really well. Great progress has been made with WLS as far as the safety aspect. For some reason people want to tell you the "I know someone who died" stories. I think at least 3 people I know had similar stories. Fact is, very few people die, complication risks are fairly low, and as we say the healthcare field the benefits outweigh the risks. Encourage your mother to educate herself on the statistics and the progresses being made with WLS. It was once deemed a risky procedure (20 something years ago), now we liken it to something on the lines of gallbladder surgery (routine and very low risk). Best wishes.

Attending my monthly support group I Met four physicians who are in the process of getting sleeved. They all were surprised with the info they got during the meetings. If a physician has difficulty understanding today's bariatric surgery I get the feeling your mother might not have the latest info out there. I'm sure you'll make the right choice for yourself.

Well, the good news is that you don't need to convince your mom, unless you're a minor. Sure, it would be nice to have her support, but you don't need it. Do what's right for you, make the right choices for you, be strong in your convictions. Practice changing the subject whenever the topic comes up.

why do you have yoconvincer her if anything? If you are old enough to make your own medical decisions, there is not a problem.

if you are a minor, you will probably have to wait until you are old enough to make your own medical decisions.

thank you everyone!

I did not tell my parents about my surgery until after it was done. Even though I am in my 60s, they still would have freaked out. When I did tell them about it a week later, they were happy for me. It was my husband I had to convince, so I took him with me to all my pre op appointments. As a result, he became my biggest supporter, always pressing me on how much protein I have had and how much water I drank.

Ask her if she would advise against an appendectomy or a gall bladder removal if it was medically indicated. Because the risks are about the same for WLS as for those other surgeries. There's tons of research out there showing that WLS is safe, and a bunch of new research saying it has better outcomes than diet/exercise.

It may even be helpful to take her along to an appointment with the surgeon and get the surgeon to address her fears.

Of course, like others have posted, what is the reason you feel the need to get her approval? It's always nicer to have your family on board, of course. But as an adult, I informed my parents that I was having the procedure and addressed their concerns as best I could. My decision was not influenced by their opinion.