Holiday Advice?

I'm not doing any holiday baking this year, since I am protein forward and avoiding empty calories and junky carbs. I have not been tempted since my surgery in July, but everywhere I go this month there are treats and food that I just have to say "No thanks" to. It seems people think it's ok for me to have just a bite, but I know what that one bite will lead to, so no thanks. Does this temptation that people throw out there get better once you get to goal? I've lost 80 pounds and feel great and I'm very proud of sticking to the plan, but I have another 100 pounds to go. What else besides positive self-talk helped you when saboteurs appeared? I think some simply may be motivated by sharing their love through food; others may be trying to de-rail me because I'm now smaller than they are. Who knows?

I've found that the more people I let know about my ketogenic way of eating, the less people try to tempt me with things I don't eat anymore. I hear more often now "I'd offer you some but I know you don't eat this stuff," which is nice. I smile now when I hear "This is something you can eat, Cathy!" lol

The fact that I work for a medical clinic probably helps, because they are all supportive. I, fortunately, haven't run into anyone that wants to sabotage me. I'm lucky that my friends and family all know how much I suffered being SMO my whole life, and would never dream of pushing something on me.

IF, however, I did run into that, I would just be firm. If a simple, "No, thanks" doesn't work, I also say "Thanks, but I don't eat that," rather than "can't" eat it. That seems to help, because it conveys that it is my choice not to eat the stuff, rather than just not eating it for now because I'm losing weight. At least it works great for me, anyway. If someone says "Why can't you?" I reply, "Oh, I can, but I choose not to, I don't eat xxx (grains, sugar, whatever)."

Good idea! It is a choice. I don't want to sound sanctimonious or like I'm judging their cooking, baking, or purchases. That's their thing, but I don't want to put crap in my sleeve! I can't believe how much better my allergies and arthritis are since giving up wheat and corn. Even cedar and mold are not bothering me! Ears are staying clear of fluid and I breathe so much better.

I have found that since my surgery in April 2016, I have cut sugar, for the most part, out of my diet unless it's fruit. I will admit that every once and a while I let myself have the occasional cookie or bit of cake. But when I'm out, most who know me know I've lost about 105 pounds and have done it, in large part, by eliminating white flour and white sugar. If I eat more than one or two bites, I find I feel ill. So, I've learned to say to people - oh - I've been off sugar for so long now that when I do eat it, it makes me physically ill - all those treats look so good, but I really don't want to feel poorly all night. Most folks respond to that readily because as soon as you say it has a physical impact, they realize what you mean.

On the other hand - my kids did some of the holiday baking and I will do some on Saturday and Sunday. I've had one or two of my childhood favorites and it has scratched the itch.

Thank you, Diana. Nobody would want to see me get sick. I suspect that sugar would make any of us with weight loss surgeries feel poorly. I was told to stick to smaller portions of lower glycemic fruits like berries and avoid fruits with higher sugar content like bananas.

actually,there are many ppl who have a VSG,for whom sugar is not a problem.

there is nothing about a sleeve that makes us any more susceptible to problems with sugar than our old full size stomachs did. A sleeve is just our old stomach made smaller.

Temption to eat things we shouldn't doesn't always get better. I still have the temptation to eat things ppl are offering and that are wildly available at the holidays.

what happens,is the new habits you are making now,continue to strengthen so it is not as much of a struggle to say no thanks.

The longer you don't consume it ,the easier it becomes. Once you do give in however,as you say,you are likely back to square one.

Reaching goal doesn't really have anything to do with it at all. Goal is just a number not a behavior mechanism.

I can attest to that comment about those with VSG that don't have any issues with sugar. I don't, whatsoever. Yes, it can be a bad thing but I know when to stop and when to say "no thank you". My entire family knows about my surgery and my mother has the sleeve as well so she always makes desserts that we can have. My co-workers as well as referring offices and patients that send in goodies do not know about my surgery, so at work I have a cookie, or a bite of whatever it is that was sent in. I don't completely restrict myself, but I don't indulge like I used to. I also don't fill myself to the point of vomiting. That used to be a big thing that I would do, I would stuff myself so full of whatever I could.

For the holiday pot-luck I chose to bring in "Grinches", Green grapes, slice of banana, strawberry, topped with a tiny marshmallow. They were a huge hit, and a much better choice than half of the other things that were there. My girlfriends and I are getting together tonight and I am preparing a veggie tray as well as a meat and cheese tray.

Good Luck and happy holidays to all of you!

I think that the matter of it being your choice, as in "I don't have that anymore" is an important one, for both sides, and helps to put things to bed fairly quickly. The "I can't have that" inevitably yields the "well, one piece won't harm you..." response.

It also means that at some point in the future, as cir****tances may dictate, you can choose to violate the rule, whether it be for a special occasion (and you haven't already worked out how to adapt those to your rules,) or just what life throws at you - conferences, banquets, etc. A couple of years ago, the restaurant where we usually holdi our support group meetings closed without warning, so we all went to the pizza place around the corner, the doc bought a couple pizzas, some ordered other things - salads or sandwiches - to their preference. A couple of the "born again" dieters that I have run into on these boards would have had a total conniption at the thought of a "bariatric pizza feed", but it worked out and nobody felt violated by it - it's just life and you deal with it. Now, most involved were many years out and had been through such situations before, and generally have worked out weight control without overly restrictive dieting, but it was one of my "learning experiences" of how to get along in this world.

It you take the view that "I can't have that..." such events can be the thin end of the wedge, where you start thinking "that wasn't so bad, I can do that again..." If you choose to do it once, you can continue to choose to not do it again.

Everyone is different and things that work for some, do not work for others and vice versa. What works for me is the path of "I choose not to eat" this or that. I will not eat something unless I choose to eat it, regardless of how much someone else pushes me or tempts me. For me, I've always been stubborn and trying to "make" me do something is a guarantee that I will do the opposite.

My enemy is myself. Rationalization is a skill that I excelled at in the past. I have schooled myself over the last 6 months to change that habit. Now, if I really want something (Cheeze Its, Cheesecake, Christmas Brownies, or anything else that is usually "off-limits") I allow myself the tiniest little smidge of a taste. I savor it, log it and then move on. I'm satisfied and this is what works for me. I don't feel deprived and as was said above: it scratches the itch. The key for me is to log it. It allows me to look back and see: Am I having a "special" treat every day? If so, that is a problem that needs to be corrected. Without logging it, it would be out of sight/out of mind and easily forgotten. Also, knowing I have to log something is a reality check... do I really want to have to put that down as an entry? Ummm... maybe not. It allows me to pass on said food item.

In hindsight, I realized that my family and I were of the mind set of food is love. My family has a saying, "If you love it, feed it!". We talked about this and when I am with them and food is becoming an issue, I will sometimes tell them now, "If you love me, don't feed me" and we all laugh.