In such a funk after seeing my doctor!

Hi Everyone,

Sorry I have been MIA for the past month. I am looking forward to catching up on how everyone has been doing.

I have been in a funk after seeing my primary care physician who I normally love. She is just not supportive AT ALL and is giving me the hardest time about having the surgery. She said that because my BMI is a 35 that I don't need it and that I will regret it if I do. She told me that I should do Weigh****chers and start exercising.

Here's my story: I am 45 and have been overweight/heavy my entire life. I have dieted since I was eight years old. I have had different points where I would lose weight for awhile (Jenny Craig when I was in college I lost 40 pounds and kept it off for awhile), did PhenFen when I was in my 20s, did HCG three years ago and lost 40 pounds only to regain within a year, etc. I have tried Weigh****chers, South Beach and a million other diets and none have worked in helping me to permanently keep the weight off. My doctor says that she doesn't believe that this will be a permanent solution either because the studies show that people regain from this procedure. She also said that I am risking my life by doing the surgery. I am completely healthy except for my weight and as I understand it the complication rate for VSG is less than 1%.

I am tired of being overweight. I am tired of carrying the weight on my body and in my head. I am working on finding the right therapist to help me so I address whatever psychological issues that I need to be successful. I think my weight is the result of genetics and not making myself a priority. I understand that a surgery can't change those two things but I do think it could be a really great tool for me to have to finally make lasting change.

Sorry for the rambling. Just wanted to share where I am. Any thoughts/insights/anything that you might have would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you.

Paige

I'm sorry - do you need your PCP's buy in for surgery? Can you find a new PCP? I'm planning on finding a new PCP for myself in 2018 because my surgeon is super weird about WLS - I'm apparently her only successful WLS patient and it's just.. strange.

People don't regain "from" having had VSG - that makes it seem like the surgery makes people regain! People have the chance to regain weight after any method of weight loss and what studies do show is that those who have WLS have a higher chance of long term success than those who don't.

It's great that you're working on finding a therapist, I firmly believe that is something that we all should do.

Hi Gwen,

Fortunately, I don't need her buy-in for surgery because I am self-pay. However, I really respect her and was surprised at her strong reaction to my having the surgery. It just threw me for a loop. I was so clear about all of it before but now I find myself second guessing myself.

Isn't it surprising that you are your PCPs only successful client? Does he/she act like they have numerous others?

Paige

I totally get that. It's not good when we expect our medical providers to react one way and get something completely different. :/

She told me, at my last visit (which was pre-op for my final reconstructive surgery) that she now tried to talk patients out of WLS because they all just gain the weight back and end up even worse off. Followed by "you're my only successful patient!" And it's very frustrating because she's said this before and I've told her, time and time again, what I've needed to do to be successful (i.e., lots of mental work) but she just doesn't seem to listen? And, of course, I have no idea how she's advising her other patients - I know that the mental health aspect is never something she suggested to me and just something that I knew I needed to do outside of her counsel.

It does seem like she has a number of other patients who have had, or are pursuing, WLS. When I first broached the topic with her, I think I just told told her "I've decided to have weight loss surgery" and her response was something along the lines of "oh, okay." As time has gone by, I have gotten pushback from her on ordering the labs I should be getting each year. :/ (Yet another reason I'm going to be looking for a new PCP in 2018.)

I feel like so many PCPs are either biased against overweight patients (thinking that the patient is lazy, is always looking for the easy way out and not trying to put in the real work) and/or they don't understand what it's like to be struggle with this issue.

I hope your doctor shares with her other patients the tools that have made you successful. I'm glad you are getting a new PCP in 2018. I love how you advocate for yourself!

That is a bummer. Is she not willing to refer you for surgery? What is your insurance criteria? If you meet your insurance criteria I would definitely find a PCP who is more open minded. I know self pay is an option for some. They have loans and such. This maybe be an option. I've also heard of awesome surgeons in Mexico, although this wouldn't be something I could ever do, but many have great success. Sorry you are going through this. I hope everything works out for the best.

Thanks, Shannon.

I am self-pay. Just feeling weird since I spoke with my doctor. It has messed with my head and made me question everything.

Paige

Ahhh I understand. That is a tough one, especially if you respect her opinion. I hope you will come to the best decision for you. At least it is your choice. Many are at the mercy of insurance companies and/or PCPs.

Thanks, Shannon!

Gah! She sounds really uninformed about WLS. It is hands down the best option out there for losing and KEEPING OFF weight. We've all lost weight dozens of times through weight loss plans and exercise (at least I have). I've never kept it off though. According to my surgeon, 96-98% of obese individuals who lose weight gain it back within 5 years. Continuing to fight those odds by yo-yoing up and down the scale is terrible for your health. With surgery you actually have decent odds of keeping a good portion of it off. More if you build excellent new habits and have a support system like OH that you are active with.