I'm Sad

congrats on the 5 years . . only 2 years, 4 months out for me. had my share of getting pounced on with "good intentioned" seasoned responses and when i was brand new, it cut deeply. . . . but there was one member named carol (cappy 11148)who kept me coming back. she's a gentle angel and a woman i considered extremely wise.

anyway, seems like you gently brought to attention what others have thought. for that, i thank you. this is my opinion . . not up for debate or meant to stomp on anyone's opinion.

joanne

Thank you for coming back. I would also love for this forum to be more active. I think many people are getting their support through facebook and instagram, but I prefer the anonymity of OH. There is definitely a vocal contingent on the forum that is judgy and negative and I'm sure that is discouraging to new people. Please do stick around and help to make it wonderful again.

I agree. I like the site. I don't have a face book OR Instagram so I don't have any idea what those communities within those networks may be. I don't participate as much as I would like because of work, but I do still like to try!

Well where have you been the past year. You have only posted today and on the 23 of October. Before that was in 2016.

I am not saying you are wrong for the way you are feeling. But the site traffic isn't up to just others it comes back to us.

I know for me coming here and giving help is getting help for me. Sounds selfish. But I can connect with people who are going through the same stuff I am. Or just the one connection of having WLS.

You really can't blame others for the site traffic. I hate this saying but when you point your finger at someone there are three pointing back at you.

So you may want to rethink your sadness and start posting and reading and helping others.

I will do my best to stay engaged. My cir****tances are much different today than when I was active. I would very much like to see the tone of responses here become positive and supportive. I read back through a few weeks and I do not see a lot of positive energy. I have a pretty thick skin so if anyone wants to direct negative energy my way I can take it.

Let's see if we can make this site great again!

I try on a daily basis. It is work. But I know for me that I need to come. Even if someone posts something I do not like.

I try to remember what this is all about. Helping each other.

I have been through a lot over the past four years. My recovery with alcoholism. And just learning about who I am and what makes me happy.

The people that you may feel that are being negative they are not bad people by any means. They are just posting how they feel. We all have good days and bad. My good days out number the bad. I have to look in the good of everyone.

Some people think I live behind rose colored glasses. I am fine with it. Life isn't always easy.

I think it really wasn't negative towards you. I think it was a way for them to tell you that you need to be here more than once a year.

So many will come only to post when they have there surgery anniversary which is great. But so many are struggling with post op. Some with regain.

Sometimes we have to hear what we don't want to. It shows us that we need to be proactive with living the life of a human who is trying to get back to a good physical state and mental state.

Greetings All, I've been on OH for nearly 9 years and am coming up on 8 year surgery day. While I don't post as often as I once did, I do check in every day and am most active on the VSG maintenance group. People seem to come and go on this forum and people who were very helpful to me 8 years ago are no longer around. I don't think those who are no longer active have anything to apologize for. They have simply moved into a different phase of life. Its like graduating into the real world.

Years ago I started the VSG maintenance group as a discussion place for long term maintenance issues. Many of us who had reached goal or were closing in found that this forum was less meaningful when most of the posts were about issues pertaining to a few weeks or months post op. So VSGM deals with long term issues though all are encouraged to read it. New ops can learn a lot by studying the long term issues.

Having said that, I do feel that us long time users of OH have some duty to pay it forward and contribute as we can. Thats why I check in and offer answers and support as I can. Many others do this too but their posts may not seem frequent. Thats because the same issues arise over and over. Sometimes we feel like we are being repetitious.

Anyway, this forum is a wonderful thing and I wouldn't be where I am without it. Hope everyone else feels the same. Diane S

Paying it forward is important. I am glad you said that.

Keith

im new to this site and looking for advice. I am 290lb 5'3" and booked for RNY in April in my home province. Im cincerned about the malabsorption og the RNY as well as tired if waiting for surgery. I am thinking of going to Mexico - A lightr me- for VSG. What are your thoughts regarding weight loss, outcomes and long tern weight loss.

Appreciate the input. MJ

MJ that is exactly why I did not opt for RNY. I am not saying it is not a good surgery because it is. I did have concerns about nutrient absorption as well. I opted for the VSG. I also had mine in Mexico and it was a wonderful experience. The standard of care down there is really quite high.

Her is your struggle. By the numbers most surgeons would recommend RNY for you because it is your best chance of losing the most weight. That being said I lost over 200 lbs with VSG and got down to just 4 lbs shy of my slightly unrealistic goal.

Both RNY and VSG are just tools and just like any other tool it can be misused but if you use the tool correctly by following the program and educating yourself on nutrition and exercise you can lose as much weight as you want. I want from being almost 400lbs un-athletic to working out twice a day and running 5ks every weekend. I was featured in a gym's newsletter for my accomplishments.

The golden ticket is getting your head in the game and making the most of it.

Please feel free to reach out with questions. Happy to help you through your journey.