I'm Sad

Nikke2003
on 11/1/17 10:03 am - PA
VSG on 05/13/13
On November 1, 2017 at 4:24 PM Pacific Time, Keith L. wrote:

First of all it was not a complaint, merely a true and factual observation. I didn't say something like "wow this site really sucks now compared to when I used to come here and post a lot". Second having posted so much absolutely gives me the right to be disappointed about the state of things today. This site was a great resource for me and has help many many people and I hope that will continue to do so in the future. Something you need to realize about a site like this is that it is not free, it requires advertising and advertisers will run for the hills when user readership goes down.

There is no question but the number of people who clearly do not feel comfortable saying in an open forum that they do not participate due to a number of users who are consistently disparaging, rude, or negative. These users were cited by name. That's a shame.

Fortunately I am not one to be intimidated and I will happily do my best to restore this to the resource it used to be within the best of my ability.

To be fair, Keith, I was around plenty when you had your surgery and there were plenty of people here that thought you were rude. Probably just as many people thought you were rude as people that thought you were helpful. Many did not like the perceived "tone" of your posts or even just the flat our words you chose to use in order to give out "tough love" as you would call it.

True and factual observations can still come off as complaints. It's all in how you word things. For example, you made a true and factual statement that a site like this is free to users so it needs advertisers. However, when you preface this statement with "Something you need to realize..." comes off as condescending. True and factual can be a complaint. True and factual can be condescending.

If you're all charged up about being consistently active again, I say go for it. But, it seems to me you are accusing others of being rude, when the tone of your posts can often be perceived that way as well.

For more info on my journey & goals, visit my blog at http://flirtybythirty.wordpress.com

  

NYMom222
on 10/31/17 8:04 am
RNY on 07/23/14

Many people do their daily posting and conversations in the daily menu thread on each of the forums.

Cynthia 5'11" RNY 7/23/2014

Goal reached 17 months. 220lb Weight Loss
Plastic Surgery Dr. Joseph Michaels - LBL and Hernia Repair 2/29/16, Arm Lift, BL, 5/2/16, Leg Lift 7/25/16

#lifeisanadventure #fightthegoodfight #noregrets

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Keith L.
on 11/1/17 9:25 am - Navarre, FL
VSG on 09/28/12

That's not a great place for off topic conversations as they do not get the visibility they need to get the most feedback. Someone who asks a question about a problem may get two or three responses in the daily menu thread where if they created a new topic may get 5 to 10 or more. If its a really hot topic many pages of responses.

VSG: 9/28/2012 - Dr. Sergio Verboonen  My Food/Recipe Blog - MyBigFatFoodie.com

?My Fitness Pal Profile ?View more of my photos at ObesityHelp.com

 

Gwen M.
on 10/31/17 8:19 am
VSG on 03/13/14

It always surprises me when people who don't participate come back to OH to complain about the lack of activity.

VSG with Dr. Salameh - 3/13/2014
Diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder and started Vyvanse - 7/22/2016
Reconstructive Surgeries with Dr. Michaels - 6/5/2017 (LBL & brachioplasty), 8/14/2017 (UBL & mastopexy), 11/6/2017 (medial leg lift)

Age 42 Height 5'4" HW 319 (1/3/2014) SW 293 (3/13/2014) CW 149 (7/16/2017)
Next Goal 145 - normal BMI | Total Weight Lost 170

TrendWeight | Food Blog (sort of functional) | Journal (down for maintenance)

Keith L.
on 10/31/17 8:23 am - Navarre, FL
VSG on 09/28/12

Judging by the ratio of positive to negative responses to my post I can clearly see why the activity on this forum is down.

VSG: 9/28/2012 - Dr. Sergio Verboonen  My Food/Recipe Blog - MyBigFatFoodie.com

?My Fitness Pal Profile ?View more of my photos at ObesityHelp.com

 

Gwen M.
on 10/31/17 8:25 am
VSG on 03/13/14

Why would you expect people who ARE active and have remained so to respond positively to your whining about forum inactivity when you, yourself, are part of the problem you're complaining about?

VSG with Dr. Salameh - 3/13/2014
Diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder and started Vyvanse - 7/22/2016
Reconstructive Surgeries with Dr. Michaels - 6/5/2017 (LBL & brachioplasty), 8/14/2017 (UBL & mastopexy), 11/6/2017 (medial leg lift)

Age 42 Height 5'4" HW 319 (1/3/2014) SW 293 (3/13/2014) CW 149 (7/16/2017)
Next Goal 145 - normal BMI | Total Weight Lost 170

TrendWeight | Food Blog (sort of functional) | Journal (down for maintenance)

Keith L.
on 10/31/17 8:30 am - Navarre, FL
VSG on 09/28/12

Actually I am not, the expectation would be on a forum is as old users drop off new users would come in. That is how it was when you joined and it was when I joined. Not sure why you are such a bitter, negative person, but I hope whatever is causing it gets better for you.

VSG: 9/28/2012 - Dr. Sergio Verboonen  My Food/Recipe Blog - MyBigFatFoodie.com

?My Fitness Pal Profile ?View more of my photos at ObesityHelp.com

 

Gwen M.
on 10/31/17 8:34 am
VSG on 03/13/14

Dude - you're the one who came to the forums just to post about how sad you are that they're not living up to your expectations.

But, please, if you're saddened by the lack of activity - stick around to help. Pay it forward. Help answer the questions of new users on a daily basis. Post to the daily meal threads. Share your experiences.

VSG with Dr. Salameh - 3/13/2014
Diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder and started Vyvanse - 7/22/2016
Reconstructive Surgeries with Dr. Michaels - 6/5/2017 (LBL & brachioplasty), 8/14/2017 (UBL & mastopexy), 11/6/2017 (medial leg lift)

Age 42 Height 5'4" HW 319 (1/3/2014) SW 293 (3/13/2014) CW 149 (7/16/2017)
Next Goal 145 - normal BMI | Total Weight Lost 170

TrendWeight | Food Blog (sort of functional) | Journal (down for maintenance)

Erin T.
on 11/1/17 3:48 am
VSG on 01/17/17

As one of the relatively new members here, I'd be sorely disappointed to wander around hitting brick walls in the dark with all the other new members. I appreciate the vets who have stuck around and patiently answered questions (some that were asked over & over again, by myself included). There are still plenty of them here, maybe you just don't see their posts?

VSG: 1/17/17

5'7" HW: 283 SW: 229 CW: 135-140 GW: 145

Pre-op: 53 M1: 22 M2: 12 M3: 12 M4: 8 M5: 10 M6: 11 M7: 5 M8: 6 M9-M13: 15-ish

LBL/BL w/ Fat Transfer 1/29/18

Neesie57
on 10/31/17 10:20 pm
VSG on 08/04/15

I'm so disappointed in the negative response you have been getting. You weren't being negative, as far as I could tell, but you sure got negative back. These responses make me uncomfortable and is one of the reasons I don't post or read as much anymore.

5' 5" tall. VSG on August 4, 2015/ Starting weight 239.9/ Surgery weight 210.9/ Current weight 137.4/ Goal weight 140/ No longer overweight, now a NORMAL weight. Now that I'm at goal, it's time to move on to maintenance!!!!!!!!

 

 

 

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