Obsessive or setting good a role model?

Thank you Donna.

I had and still have unhealthy relationship with food. I a m working on it everyday. I am getting better, but I know I can never stop working on it. My partner is normal and he had rather healthy relationship with food. I learned a lot about that being with him. Watching him eat, seeing what he eats, how much, is an eye opener. He is probably the most "healthy normal" eater I ever was around.

I know other people will think you are being obsessive or encouraging kids toward rigid thinking, but you are teaching and involving your kids in portioning out food for the family as a team and they are learning to read labels. They eventually will be able to just eyeball a portion size even when away from home if their eyes see normal portions growing up. This was something I was not able to do as a young person. Eating crackers out of a box, having big serving bowls where we could go back for seconds because it tasted good, or going to restaurants and not considering the portions are often enough for 2-3 people did not help me. When I started measuring very far into adulthood, my idea of portion size was very skewed. I am not exaggerating--I probably ate 3X normal portion sizes and often ate beyond satiety. That's how I got to be over 300 pounds by age 53. I think you have the best interests of your children in mind, knowing that it's important to their health. It's not like you are yelling at them over food or weighing THEM constantly. Good job, Mama!

I would not find that described situation funny in anyway shape or form If that was my children. The last thing I want my children is to develope anxieties over food in either way shape or form. But you know your children and perhaps he was just kidding . But I'd be concerned for MY children if either of them were deadly serious about 1 cracker going over the weight. :) I don't know anything about anyone else's children.

I do agree teaching about healthy food portion control balanced diet etc is awsome

Thanks for your replies. I don't think my children have eating disorders. I do portion everything out. With 5 kids, there would be no junk food left for the other kids because one of them would eat all the food in a single setting. After talking to my 9 year old, I explained that serving sizes are suggested and not exact. It just gives you an estimate. He is in the concrete stage of thinking and he feels like servings should be exact. Also, he was concerned that his brother was getting more crackers than him.

Good job! :)

And there's the real answer - one was getting "more" than the other My kids are so black and white like that. DH has come up with a method where if they are splitting an item, one gets to split it in half and other gets to choose their half. Seems to work most of the time to keep them from complaining over who gets more!

This is how splitting ALWAYS worked in my family, no matter who was doing the splitting/sharing. My mom and I still always do this if we're splitting things with each other :D

I like that second part about worried his brother was getting more crackers than him, that simplifies it enough :p I was not worried about eating disorders, but I would never say anything about anyone elses children but I used to do 'funny' things like that.. It was not funny to me, but funny to adults around when I was 8, I was diagnosed with OCD when I was 15 when it became more sinister and less funny. :P But its so nice that you your son chat freely with each other etc. I would do less of the weighing infront of him and focus more on just portioning out about the same around him, I do count exactly the same amount of grapes for both my kids as my 5 year old checks both of their food to make sure she does not have LESS as she is a whole year older lol and expects a dash more despite them being the same size lol. So I am constanlty saying "its exactly the same" lol she doesnt have ocd lol but its easier for me to count and have exact portions to reduce arguments between them both :P You are doing a great job!! Aslong as there is no anxiety when you refuse to remove the extra cracker, I think all is well and he may just be particular, and there is nothing wrong with that.

Yeah, I totally get what you are saying. I think in your case it's fine (I've been reading your posts for ages!); my answer was more in general for other folks reading.

I see the results of people who aren't nearly as good at extrapolating this to their kids as you are every day, and it's very sad.

Such a good discusson topic, Ajeffries, and a wonderful answer, Donna!