Gaining weight

I've gained 10lbs in 2 months. My eating is out of control, my hunger - or head hunger is beyond unsatiable, and I can't seem to get my head back on track. I'm 2.5 years out, have never hit my goal weight, was striving so hard, now I don't know what's happening... I've always had my ups and downs, now it just seems like all downs, with no reasoning or excuses behind it.

I'm sorry, this sounds challenging. I would try to work on prioritizing dense proteins because those should make you feel more full and less like eating.

But, I'm sure you know how you're supposed to eat and, it sounds to me, like you just can't make your brain comply right now. I really recommend that you consider talking with your bariatric surgeon and also scheduling with a therapist to talk about what's going on in your brain that's causing your eating to be out of control.

Don't give up on yourself. Seek help to figure out what's going on. If you have access to a local Overeater's Anonymous group that might be beneficial as well.

Sounds spot on. I know I should reach out to them, and it probably will help, but I think it goes with my brain just not complying - to anything. I will call tmrw though, because I just don't want it to get further.

I feel like I've failed, I feel like my sleeve doesn't work anymore, when I know it does. It's just letting in 10x more bad food, then the dense protein.

I read through your old posts and it seems like you've had less than stellar experiences with mental health professionals so are dubious. For what it's worth, it can take many tries to find a therapist that clicks for you. Which is a drag, but I think it's easier to suffer through the process if you know that it might take time. Use your health care team and create Team Emily that will help you.

You haven't failed - you're reaching out and trying to get back on track. Fight for yourself.

At 30 months out I had a doctor appointment and had gained five pounds in one month. At that time, I only weighed at the doctor's office and had put my home scale away.

At the time, I laughed about the regain. I was still below goal. A month later, I had added another five pounds and was now two pounds above goal. I did not really care. The following month another five pounds and seven above goal.

I panicked. I went to my surgeon who told me that I was experiencing the bounce back regain that he had told me about from the beginning. I sat down with the nutritionist and went over my eating.

She explained that my smaller body now needed less food to maintain my weight. She told me to stop the protein shakes and she told me to start weighing myself every single day. I found it was very hard work to get that weight back off.

You are not a failure. You are normal. Your body has recovered and learned how to hold more food and more weight. It wants back the weight that it lost an it will tell you to eat more.

I have a food scale and measure everything I eat or drink. I track everything in My Fitness Pal. I weigh myself daily. I use a fitness tracker and smart scale. I know how many calories I need to maintain. It is a lot less than I could eat and I lot less than I would like to eat.

The only way surgery works long term is if you work at it.

You can change. You may need guidance and help, but YOU are capable. Build a team for YOU. It will take listening to what they have to say, even if you don't like it, but there are very few people *****ally are out to mess up others. 90% of people, and 95% of people in the medical profession really want to help others. So when there is a conflict it is more than likely that the person you are interacting with is not expressing thoughts in a way you are able to internalize and use, rather than they are intentionally giving you bad information or intentionally misleading you. That being said, you get to pick who you work with. Find a team that you feel supports you.

In the mean time there are a number of things you can do for yourself.

1) Positive Verbalization: Write notes to yourself, make positive statements outloud to yourself, and call your self by name. Statements like, "I, Mary, will drink 3 24 oz bottles of water per day. I, will have one between breakfast and lunch, one between lunch and dinner, then one after dinner before bed time." Write it down where you will read it. Then when you wake, try "Mary, this morning I am going to drink my bottle of water!" Positive affirmation of action about to be performed. This will help you tackle the issue one step at a time.

2) Discard negativity: There is lots and lots of it around us all the time. But we can choose what we want to do with it. Be it politicians, news outlets, or the people around us, they can be filled with negativity. However, it is your choice and your power, deciding what to do with that energy. Be it Auntie Sue who mouths off with, "I knew you were never going to keep the weight off" or coworker Skinny Sue who bounces in bragging about her new hunk of a boyfriend, and the brand new size 0 dress she is wearing. Personally I would look at Auntie Sue sideways and say, "Thank you for your thoughts Auntie, but I am working on a new plan and the weight will be coming back off." To Skinny Sue I would just laugh. She might think I am laughing with her, personally I would be laughing AT her, because she obviously is so clueless that she thinks I have a need to compete or try to be like her. I am ME, I have my own life, not hers.

3) Don't dwell in the past: Yesterday is gone, heck so is a minute ago. You can't undo time. What you can do is change the future. If you trip, pick yourself up. If you eat a cookie, choose not to have a second one. Make a different choice the next time. The only reason to look backward is to see if you can see a trend or pattern of choices you have made, so that you can change the choices you make in the future. But let go of the past. It is over. Life is like trying to sail a boat across the ocean. You can't push your way against opposition any more than you can sail into the wind. What you can do is use the opposition to speed you around the issue. You don't get to your objectives in a straight course, you have to avoid obstacles, the winds of change may blow you off course, HOWEVER you can correct the course! Heck once you get to a goal, you have new goals to set!

Having been through hell twice now, I can affirm that these mental activities helped me keep going. The first trip through I would start my day with a positive decision... "Good morning, Mary, Today I shall not go insane. I might tomorrow, but not today." Having made just 1 positive decision first thing enabled me to see, positive opportunities and choices as the day went on.

You can do it! You can find the help you need. And you made a positive step today by asking for help here!

Best of luck!

Read Devon's article on regain in the most recent OH newsletter. Its full of wisdom on regain and dealing with it. GL Diane S

I have looked and can't find the newsletter. Can you tell me where I would n=find it. TIA