Feeling like a failure

My vsg was in 2015.  I only lost 153lbs.  Yes I know it's good but I've fallen off the wagon and back to bad eating habits.  I've gained 16lbs and scheduled for skin removal and breast reconstruction on May 4th.  I'm worried that they won't do it because of weight gain.

I don't think you should feel like a failure. Everyone messes up. Life happens, bad choices happen, and good habits start getting a little dusty. I am by no means an expert on the surgery since I am just a month with my VSG, but I know you shouldn't feel like a failure. Just get back onto a diet, or work out more to compensate for what you eat. I don't think they will turn you away from surgery with only 16lbs gained though.

I did great with weight loss until about 3 months ago.  Now all I do is eat bad things.  I need to get back on track.

Do you log your food? That has 100% helped me keep my head on straight. I use Myfitnesspal app and the website and log everything I put in my mouth including my fluids and all my exercise for the day. It is even fun for me to put it all in and see what my numbers are at the end of the night.

The only way you can find out about whether your surgery will go through is if you call the surgeon's office and ask.  I recommend doing that so you'll know instead of just worrying about it which might lead to more bad habits.  

Are you seeing a therapist?  If you're not, I highly recommend doing that to help you to figure out why you're sabotaging yourself and what's going on that has caused you to return to bad habits.  I also recommend tracking/measuring everything you eat with something like MyFitnessPal so you know what you're putting into your body and can make the necessary diet adjustments.  

Use your worry and feelings of being a failure productively to propel you back on track :)

I was tracking my food.  I'm seeing a therapist but not for this.  I have an appointment with nutritionist next week.  I would be ok if I wasn't hungry all the time.

What are you eating?  Give us an example of a day or two of meals so we can troubleshoot for you.  

If you're eating things you shouldn't be, those things also don't tend to fill you up which then compounds the issue because you're hungry.  If you stick to dense protein, like chicken breast, you'll feel fuller for longer.  

Today I had gluten free lasagna for dinner.  Lunch was bacon wrapped chicken.  Breakfast was gluten free blueberry pancakes.  Normally for breakfast it's eggs and bacon.  I snacked on gf rice chips.

Do you have celiac disease?  

I think that part of your problem is that you're eating too many carbs.  What are your portion sizes like?  I'd swap out your carb foods for dense proteins like steak, more chicken, pork, etc, and switch your snack to something that's dense as well - like jerky.  See how that works for a week.  

I don't have celiac but have grown an intolerance to wheat or grains.  I will try that.