Almost Cancelled yesterday

The statistics are slim that you will lose the weight and keep it off.  My surgeon at my weight loss seminar stated this. I can't remember exactly, but I think it is less than 3% keep their weight off. Something to ponder.

During my 3 month nutritional program, prior to surgery, I lost quite a bit of weight and all of my meds were discontinued:  cholesterol, blood pressure and anti-depressant.  My blood pressure was borderline.  The only co-morbitiy that I had was mild sleep apnea, which I was diagnosed with a month prior to starting my nutritional program.  I exercised and dieted most of my life and pursued weight loss surgery off and on for 16 years. Due to my weight I had a knee replacement 2 years ago and every treatment imaginable on the other knee. After moving to a different city and my employer's insurance co. switching a couple of years ago, my surgery came to fruition.  It was a dream come true.  The past 6 months have been challenging and I know it will continue to be challenging to keep the weight off but I feel grateful to have this tool that totally reset my metabolism. I found hope!

Prior to surgery, like everyone else, I was nervous, anxious, excited, etc. 

It is awesome that so many people responded to your post. Getting other's opinions hopefully can help you feel better with what ever decision you make. 

Please keep us posted what your decision is!!! 

Thank you all so much for your replies. I appreciate that you took time out of your day to write.  Unfortunately, many of you did not understand what I was saying.  At no time did I say that I wasn't ready to commit to the lifestyle changes, but rather I said that since I am, and since I have the ability to have substantial additional support tools, I have struggled with the decision over whether surgery is really warranted.  I appreciate that many of you took the time to share your stories and related to where I am at this moment.  That was extremely helpful and was exactly what I was looking forward. I'm disappointed that many of you chose to lecture and insult, but it is an internet chat room after all.

So thank you again for your time and to those of you who shared your story.  My nurse suggested that I post something here.  And despite Anita's very kind response and encouragement to come back, I won't.  But I'm glad I stopped by.

Wishing you all much health and happiness.

I believe that this reply demonstrates your lack of readiness for surgery - you did not get the replies you wanted to tell you what you wanted to hear, so you're going to run and never come back.  A lot of the WLS process for me was learning to get outside of my comfort zone.  

Oh, we understood completely what you were saying. You think you are ready to commit, and we told you that you are emphatically NOT ready.

Keep working on your own, with your commitment and your substantial additional resources. I wish you luck. I really, really do. But your chance of long term success is incredibly low. Like, winning the lottery low.

I think you'll eventually come back, when you realize WLS is your only viable alternative. Best of luck in your future endeavors.

My normal response to the posts from folks here are having cold feet immediately prior to the surgery is that it is normal to feel nervous, everyone does, just take the plunge. Very very few of us regret having surgery and this is true even for folks who deal with leaks. My normal response to posts saying the spouse doesn't want them to do surgery is that you are not doing it for your spouse, you are doing it for your own health and many times the spouse comes around after surgery is done and the loss improves your life dramatically. For posts saying the partner lost a lot and that you should just diet and exercise I respond that less than 5% of people have the ability to lose and keep off the weight. With all that said, I am not so sure this applies to you. I did not read through all of the posts to see how much overweight you are, but that you are otherwise healthy. I know you don't have your head fully in the game, but with that supportive of a husband I bet you would do just fine with surgery. Even I thought I would never be one to make it to goal, and was just hoping to lose enough weight to have better mobility. The surgery is a total game changer. Consequently, I would still say take the plunge. I too wrestled with surgery over several years and put it off. During that time I gained a lot more weight and my health deteriorated. What you do need to do is to commit to something- either work harder without the surgery or with. 

"The surgery is a total game changer." Great line! I actually got flitter flutters reading that

In general, your chances of losing the weight and keeping it off long term are about 3%. Most people fail. I thought I was not most people... but sadly, I was, and I proved it, over and over. WLS is a TOOL... and yes, a lifestyle change. You have to be committed to change, and accept that, much as you want, you can't do it successfully, long term, on your own - you need a tool to help you.

I don't know your age, height or weight, but you noted a bmi of 44.1 in your profile - meaning you are well into the "severely obese" range, regardless of your other parameters. Thus, I also must question your statement that you are "healthy". If nothing else, your joints and lungs, liver and heart are suffering from the excess adipose tissue you're hauling around. How many flights of stairs can you scale without getting winded? How hard is it to put on your socks and tie your sneakers?

If you're not ready, you're not ready. WLS is absolutely not the answer for everyone. I agree with others here who posted: if you're not ready, cancel your appointment asap, stop wasting the doctors' time and your insurance company's money, and let someone else who is ready get started on their own road to success and health a little bit sooner.

I want to thank everyone for their honest feedback.  I'm brand new to posting on this forum, although I've read through several of the threads in the past few weeks.  This particular thread kind of hit home for me.  I could somewhat relate to Keke228.  Bariatric surgery is not new to me though.  I just spent the last 8 1/2 years with a lap band that I just had removed after Christmas.  I'm approved to convert to the sleeve, but having some of the same thoughts as Keke.  I have been reading about the pre and post op diet and keep asking myself, if I have to do that for a few weeks, why can't I just do it on my own.  I know the answer, as I've been down the road before, but it is still tugging at me.  I truly liked the idea of the band as my body was still intact.  Unfortunately, I could never get it right and was not overly successful.  I was too tight or too loose and learned to "game" my band so I could eat.  After multiple slips and a constant feeling of "gunk" in my throat that I couldn't swallow, I called uncle and had it removed after gaining back 30 in the last 3 years.   With the sleeve surgery though, I'm removing a part of my body.....what the heck am I thinking!  Am I crazy?  I have had several people at work that have lost weight via various diets and exercise programs.  Why can't I do that?  Again, I know the answer, but still struggling with this decision for some reason.  I had my gall bladder out shortly after my lap band surgery 8 years ago (which was obviously due to the roller coaster weight gain & loss over the years) and I was fine with removing that organ.  Why is removing part of my stomach such an issue for me to overcome?  I think some of it for me is the perceived reaction I have in my head of what others will think of my decision, as I told very few people about my lap band (right or wrong) and had the removal done at Christmas, so no time off work.  With the sleeve, I will be out for a few weeks and when I come back, it will be obvious I did something while I was gone.  In my head I hear people saying, "I can't believe she had surgery.  Why didn't she just work harder, eat less, eat better, work out, etc. etc."  I am also trying to reset my own mind as I wasn't as disciplined with the band as I could have been.  But there are no do-overs with the sleeve, so I have to get this right.  I have no surgery date at this point and do have to wait a minimum of 3 months before I could do anything, so I am really trying to use this time to figure it all out.  I know I want the end result.  I had a taste of it with the band.  I just didn't get all the way, then took several steps back.  Am I willing to go all in?  Looking for some feedback on others epiphany with the sleeve and why this worked when other options didn't and how you overcame the head game.

All good thoughts, but just to add:

1. It will NOT be obvious you "had something done" after two weeks. It took months of losing before anyone ever said anything to me other than "you look great" and not one person - NOT ONE - has ever come out point blank and asked if I had bariatric surgery. And I've lost almost 80 pounds. !!!

2. Many people only take a week off. I had my procedure done on a Wednesday, came home on Friday, took off the next week, and was back to work the week after. If you say you're having "a procedure", most people figure it's a female procedure anyhow. As it happens, I took the same amount of time off when I had an endometriosis procedure in 2003. At any rate: it's a private decision, and you have no requirement to explain anything to anyone. Remember HIPAA and your right to privacy!!  :)

Best of luck in your decision - my only regret is that I didn't do it years earlier due to insurance non-coverage, and vehement lack of family support (they've since changed their minds).