Sharing the news?

First post!

I've been spending a good amount of time reading up various threads on this site. So glad to see how supportive and helpful this community is! I'm glad to say that I'm scheduled for a VSG on February 1. Getting excited and also nervous, as I see many people are before.

I was hoping to hear people's insights regarding sharing the news of the surgery, especially at work. I've already spoken to my boss about the surgery and needed time off, and she's very supportive. But - I manage a team of 12 people, and under those 12 is about half of our organization. I don't especially care to broadcast this info out to the entire group, which will then percolate throughout the rest of the company.

For people outside of work other than my close family, my plan was to say nothing unless asked, but to share and be truthful with those asking about how I lost the weight. It's not that I'm ashamed - I just lean to being private and not sharing my business with the rest of the world. That could potentially work at the office as well, but what do I say about the weeks I am away from the office? Nobody in the company takes vacations as long as this leave will be, so I don't really want to go there.

Any thoughts or personal experiences? Thanks!

As for telling the team that works for you, I would just simply tell them that you have to take a little time off for a procedure.  If they ask, and you feel comfortable enough to tell them, share your story.  Most people will not ask what kind of procedure you're having but ask if everything is alright.  Of course, you know how to answer that one!  Good luck in your journey!

That's helpful, thank you. You have to say something, right? And keeping it minimal seems to make the most sense.

I simply told people who I didn't want to disclose the truth to that I was having an abdominal procedure, but I would be okay and there was nothing to be concerned about. If a person pushed for more info, I usually said I really didn't want to discuss it. Because of that, several people thought I had cancer. You know the rapid weight loss thing. I assured those worriers that I was fine. After a while people even forget you had anything done. 

This is the risk of disclosing a little information - conclusions are drawn, probably inaccurate ones. But, I guess it's just a balancing act that has to be managed, just like my team. Thanks for the advice!

I don't work outside of my home but as far as telling others I told only a couple of close friends/family and my husband told a couple of co-workers.  I don't think I will be very open with people that aren't very close to me.  I too am not ashamed but tend to be super private.  That is great that you have a surgery date.  Feeling nervous and excited was exactly how I felt too.  My surgery was the end of October and I still can't believe I had it. It was the best decision ever.  Keep us updated on your progress.  

Thanks for the words of encouragement!

Hi from NH!

I, too, have 86 lbs to lose but have not been given a surgery date yet. Waiting for insurance to approve it. Hoping for January. A bit nervous but excited to start a new chapter in my life. This site is wonderful for learning about anything and everything regarding the VSG. The people are wonderful.

Knowing that I was going to have surgery, I worked two jobs and have since left the most stressful one. Not everyone is able to do that and I'm very thankful that I could. Having been in an office setting for many years as a manager, I always seemed to shy away from sharing too much information with my co-workers. I did had a few select co-workers that I trusted and they remain my friends today.

I always answered any questions with the truth but didn't elaborate if I didn't feel comfortable doing so. Unfortunately, some things will be noticed. Like my two pregnancies, you won't be able to hide the change that is about to happen. It's one thing to keep your new diet under wraps but your clothing hanging off you is another thing entirely. For me, the best answer would be that "I had a medical issue that I needed to tend to. Nothing serious. I'm just trying to get healthier. I'm back and ready to get down to business."

I hope that helps in some small way. It's not easy.

Good luck.

I have to say I was very surprised at how easily insurance approval came, especially given some of the horror stories I've read. My pulmonologist recommended I go check out options offered within my medical group, which seems to do their own approvals, and I was good to go.

Stress isn't a huge issue for me at work (most days), but I am having a little bit of anxiety being gone for several weeks. That said, I know it's worth the time to attain this valuable tool in aiding my health.

I agree with being truthful (so much easier!), but disclosing a minimum.

Thanks for the advice!

I told as few people as possible because everyone has an opinion and they feel you need to hear it.....even if you aren't interested. They will tell you how their mother's, sister's friend's, uncle's brother's, boss's wife's nephew had the surgery and gained all the weight back in 1 week. They'll also tell you how that same person decided to sip apple cider vinegar every 10 minutes for a week and suddenly lost 150 pounds overnight and has kept it off for 20 years.

I told people that I was having my hiatal hernia repaired..........which I did........and only my boyfriend and two close friends know the truth. For me, the fewer people who know the facts, the better...that way, when I'm out for a meal, no one is watching every morsel that goes in my mouth, no one is watching every pound that does or does not come off as quickly as they think it should, etc.

My feeling is that this is my journey, my personal business and my choice......sadly, some people have told the wrong person and they have been bombarded with all sorts of negativity from people who simply don't understand.

I revised from a lap-band and before I had that done 10 years ago, I HAD a friend who told me that instead of having the surgery, I should do what she does....have a Wendy's salad every day for lunch and the weight will come off. She told me that one salad kept her full all day and she usually couldn't eat dinner because she was still full. Of course, she neglected to mention later on that she was severely deficient in vitamins and now has osteoporosis.............and I saw her last year....apparently she's given up on the salads and has probably put on 30 pounds.

Sorry...I don't mean to sound negative.....just be careful who you tell because all the people who don't know your situation or struggle will be sure to tell you how to lead your life, will assume you're taking the easy way out and the really not nice ones will be watching every move you make so that they can be sure to point out any slips you may or may not make......many of those people probably can't succeed at their own things so they revel in what they see as your weakness.

Other than that......congrats on moving forward with getting healthy.....