Buyer's Remorse

Right now, you have all of the negative consequences of surgery, and none of the benefits. In another month or so, you will start to see a continuous series of victories, both large and small. You will be so very happy you had this surgery. In the meantime, just do your work, one day after another. 

The first few months are the hardest as you transition to a new way of eating. The hardest part for me was sitting down at the table with my family and not being able to eat anything solid. I still miss it sometimes, but I always tell myself that there isn't a slice of pizza out there that tastes as good as my weight loss looks and feels. It gets easier as you watch the pounds melt from your body and numbers drop on the scale. You'll remember why you chose this to begin with. I do recommend following up with a local support group or psychologist. The way we think and feel about food is our biggest hurdle and downfall. Good luck and hang in there!

I think your emotional state is likely due to what you've just been though physically (the procedure, the anesthesia, the physical changes that are happening right now in your body) and mentally (what a huge emotional you've just undertaken!).  You will not regret your decision to do this once you start seeing and feeling the tangible benefits of significant weight loss, just trust me/us on that one.  I was actually surprised to read that others actually miss the ability to eat as they did before.  For me, my only regret with this whole thing is how close to "normal" I feel right now- I wish I could feel more like what I did in that first year post-op.  Being satisfied on a few bites of Greek yogurt sounds like a dream to me now! Lol. 

So, know 2 things as you move forward:

1. You will not feel like this forever- this way of life will get easier, and you will very much reap the rewards of what you have done.
2. You will not feel like this forever- due to this, it will get harder as you feel more normal and can eat more. Take advantage of what you have now, and be grateful for it while it lasts.  

We are cheering you on!!!

Laura

TOTALLY FELT THIS WAY.  It got worse when i stalled in week 3.  i thought wait.  im not losing weight. im gonna be a freak for the rest of my life cuz i can't eat like a normal person AND im sick everyday.  WTF??  also i did want to have the ability to eat like i did before just like have the choice that i thought was taken away from me after surgery.

but all this does pass. i promise.  a) you can eat much more normal after a while b) the weight will keep coming off if u do the right things c) you get sick way less as time goes on.  you got this.  it is hard in the beginning but then it changes your life!  stay strong we are all here for you!

Give yourself a little time to heal, physically and also emotionally.  I think you will find that when you are able to eat food, and not just liquids you will realize what "full" feels like, and you won't really want to eat more than you are able.  

Totally normal, you feel bad, can't move around as easily, are eating "stupid" undesirable food, are probably dreaming of a steak and potato dinner and can't figure out how that will ever happen again.  The 2-3 weeks after surgery for me sucked, there is no other way to say that.  You go through every emotion from happy your loosing, to feeling sad you'll never eat an entire sub sandwich again because it's just physically impossible.  

So what to do:  Make a list of things your not going to be eating so your can morn their loss.  But also make a list of the protein forward foods you love.  For me it was bacon!  I love bacon and I love cookies.  Cookies are not on my personal list because I have an issue controlling sugar. But bacon on the other hand is very tasty to me and I decided it was on my new list of treats.  Beef jerky, salmon, eggs, all things I didn't eat often but love, I concentrated my efforts on those foods I love but due to my pizza, take out, and other bad habits I wasn't getting to.  So while your recovering make your list.  When it finally hit me I could eat bacon which I love, it made cookies not sound like such a bad thing to give up.

I know exactly how you feel, but this is your recovery period talking. I think all of us felt at least a little remorse in the first few months. I had surgery 10 months ago and it is so, so, SO worth it. I was worried about missing my old eating habits, but I've learned to gravitate towards healthy options almost unconsciously. You will find it getting easier and easier as the days go by to make good choices. I think the easiest thing is protein shakes--not only are they perfect for your new protein requirements, but they're also a hell of a lot more convenient than making your breakfast from scratch or stopping at Dunkin' Donuts or McDonald's every day. You won't have the stomach capacity to eat a whole Egg McMuffin and if you're like me, you'll get used to the concept of seeing half-eaten food as "wasted money" and not bother with things you can't finish. Protein shakes are some of my favorite things now because they're easy and if you buy them in bulk, they're cheaper than most other quick options.

Also, bear in mind that with the sleeve, you may still tolerate the things you used to eat--I haven't met a food that I could eat before surgery that I can't eat now. You don't have to say goodbye to the foods themselves, but more to the old eating habits--eating when sad, stressed, angry, etc. You can treat yourself once in a while and still see weight loss--I'm living proof of that. My favorite place to eat before surgery was Chili's, and my favorite things on the menu were the chicken crispers and the skillet queso. I can still eat those things, but where I used to get them once a week to a few times a month, I've only had them once or twice since surgery, and instead of eating them all myself, I shared the queso with others/got the crispers as a kid's meal and only ate one or two. Even with occasional indulgences, I've lost 96 pounds since my high weight, 90 of which came off as a result of surgery (the other 6 pounds came off during the insurance mandated pre-op diet).

You have made one of the greatest decisions for your health and future. It's normal to have buyers remorse after major life events, whether it be surgery, graduating from school, marriage, buying a house, having a baby...it's part of human nature. For now, the fact that you recognize that the remorse won't last forever and that you actually did make the best choice for you. Take your time healing and don't focus on the far-out future, just focus on getting your new day-to-day routine down.

You are on the precipice of amazing things. You are smart, strong, and awesome. You will get through this and we'll all be here to help you through.

I cried and cried the first few weeks. I was so mad at myself for letting myself become obese and for not being able to lose weight without surgery. I did not think things would ever get better or that I would ever feel "normal" again. Slowly but surely things got better. Hang in there. You are definitely not alone!!

  When I was in the full liquid stage I wanted to chew something so bad, so I got some sugar free bubble gum. Chewing at that point made me queezy. So I was over the urge to eat until I progressed to the next stage. And even then I often didn't want to eat,( go figure ) But it gets better. Now I like to eat again, and my small portions are starting to seem normal to me. 

I am sure there are lots of people who can relate - myself included!  I had VSG on 4/28/16.  The first week and a half I was thinking to myself..."What the heck did I do to myself?"  But yes...once I was able to get in shakes I felt sooo much better.  Now, even though I am on my 'new normal' (no longer on the 5 week post op diet) I don't eat any carbs.  I know a few people personally who have had this and once they could eat regular foods they went back to eating heavy carbs just smaller amounts.  I am determined to get the most out of my surgery and life!  Plus, I don't feel hungry so that helps with cravings. :)  Hang in there, it will get better, it truly will!