Emotional trauma and head hunger

I'm 13 months out, have now lost 118 lbs & am 4 lbs from my goal of having a normal bmi, which will be a first for me. Before surgery, I never knew what is was like to feel full after eating. Surgery has provided me the ability to recognize that feeling. The rest was all up to me. I listened to my nutritionist, weighed, measured & tracked all my meals & snacks, stayed hydrated, attended support meetings (including this site), took my vitamins, ate protein forward meals, kept low carb & stayed away from "white" foods (breads, pastas, potatoes). I am not an angel, I tend to over-eat carbs at night and still struggle with head hunger. The difference now is I can recognize it as that & if I choose to allow myself a snack, I only have ones in the house that I know I can handle in limited quantities.  

I would say that my best strategy is that I pre-plan my day (using myfitnesspal.com) the night before. This way I know that I'll make my protein & calorie goals for the day. And if I go out for a meal, it's easy to look at a menu online, make a decision (before I go) then make my substitutions in the app.

What I'm trying to say is that the surgery made it possible for me to make changes, stick with them & see the results. It's a lot of work, a life long commitment, but the results are so worth it. Bottom line is, it's your body, your life & your decision. 

Hi Katie,

This is such a thoughtful question.  I'm so glad you asked it. 

Head hunger is a real issue for us.  Many of us use food as a way of comforting  ourselves when stressed or anxious or sad.  I've searched for alternative ways to deal with these emotions, and to some extent, I have made progress.  but when it comes to the big stresses in life, death of a loved one, life-threatening illness in our children, betrayal, etc., I still haven't found a good replacement for food as comfort. 

One fact  that might help clarify:  The sleeve only works if you do it right.  When we eat dense protein, it causes the pyloric valve to close at the base of the stomach, limiting the stomach's capacity.  If we eat chips and dip, or bread and butter, or junk food, the pyloric valve doesn't close, and we can eat larger quantities of food.  So we still have the option of over-eating if we want to.  That's why so many people gain the weight back after the surgery.

Success with wls must include following the rules whi*****ludes eating dense protein first, avoiding liquids before, with, and after meals, avoiding carbs (to minimize cravings) and avoiding grazing. 

So the good news and bad news is that you will still be able to use food as comfort when you really need it.  But this will limit your success at maintaining a normal weight.

best wishes,

Carol

I'm so glad you posted this. I will be sleeved in a month and I think this is one of my biggest fears. I feel like about 70% of the reason I'm overweight is that I eat to soothe. I'm sure a lot of us do that!

I am not really speaking from experience but in talking to friends who have had the surgery....I have gotten some good advice.

I have been told that part of the success of overcoming head hunger is making substitutions. For example if you are feeling bad and want to stuff your face with sweets, find an acceptable sweet alternative - like a warm cup of tea with sugar free sweetner. Chew sugar free gum if you just want something in your mouth. Find ways to trick your brain into thinking its having a treat. From what I've been told the satisfaction from the substitution isn't immediate, but over time you begin to crave your new comfort food or drink Instead of the old donuts you used to reach for. 

Hi Katie, I am a fellow survivor of childhood trauma and worried about not being able to process feelings without food as therapy.  I am three months out and doing well.  I was totally against surgery until I lost my mother and sister in 2014 and I woke up to the fact that they could not or did not make changes that may have allowed them to live longer - and I appeared to be headed in the same direction.  I am about to be 50 and have lost almost 50 pounds since surgery in Dec 2015.  I have plenty more to lose and still get hungry, but I am managing my feelings and stress without turning to overeating.  The surgery did not stop hunger or cravings but for me the wonderful feeling of being headed in the rigth direction is so powrful that it helps me to stay on track.  I find that I am in disbelief at times about how much I have lost or what size I wear now but that is probably normal after being overweight most of my life.  I try to pay attention to my thinking and feelings and have been staying very busy at home lateley painting and focusing on home improvements, I am sure this is also part of having more energy.  I am a counselor and know that I cannot therapize myself - I try of course - but it does not work effectively.  I may head in to see a therapsit at point, but I am making progress and moving forward with my new life.  I hope this rambling helps in some way.  Do what you feel you need to do.  I do not have any regrets.