6 days until surgery, and I am terrified
Hi everyone. I know it is normal, but sometimes it helps to talk about it.
I have surgery on the 19th, and I am so so scared. I am afraid that I am about to make a decision that will cause me a lifetime of pain and sickness. I have heard horror stories about people having dry heaves, nausea, diarrhea, etc. for months! Is that true? How can I work if I am that sick? I have 2 weeks of leave, that is all I get. I have to go back to work after 2 weeks. Will I make it?
My husband is very worried about me. He keeps telling me he hopes I will be okay. If I am not, he will be so sad. I do not want him to worry about me, I am worried enough! He is already sad watching me go through this liquid diet. I know I should be focused on me, but I love him and I do not want him to be worried. I try to brace him for what I know is coming, 4 weeks of me not really eating, and that is okay, but to him it is not okay. He doesn't see how that could be ok. Maybe he will understand, I hope.
I still have people telling me not to do it. Telling me I can lose it on my own if I try. I have lost about 120 pounds on my own already, and I think I could keep going, but I am afraid that in a few months I will give it up and go back to eating like crap, and be in the same situation only I will not be a week away from surgery, I will have to start over.
I am not going to give up. I am going to have this surgery. I have come so far, too far to go back now. I just wish I could predict the future and know that it will be worth it. I have seen so many posts about extreme pain, regret, not losing weight, being sick, etc. that I am just so scared.
Maybe it is the lack of food talking, but I cannot see myself skinny, and that worries me. Maybe that is because I will never get there. Keep in mind, skinny in my mind is pretty much anything under 200 lol That happens when you start at 450. God damn, 450, that is where I started. That is crazy. Yes, I must have surgery. Otherwise next time I give up, I might end up at 500...
Sorry to ramble, and I doubt this is something to post on the forum, but can someone tell me you felt this way too? and now you look back and laugh at your crazy doubt?
Thank you!
Age: 34 / Height 5' 8" / Starting weight July 2015: 446.0 lbs / Surgery Date & Weight: 1/19/16 - 320.4 / Lost pre-op: 125.6lbs / Goal Weight: 180 lbs
It is very normal to be scared, I was too. But don't worry uourself sick. You have to have a positive attitude, that will hel greatly during your recovery. Some people do have complications but most people don't. I had my surgery on 12/29 and I feel great! I took some pain medicine a few hours after my surgery and I haven't taken any since, haven't needed it. Follow your surgeon's instructions to the T, that will aid in your success. You have come this far, don't back out, you can do this! I hope everything goes well.
Kyzze
Take a deep breath and relax! This is the best decision I have ever made and I wish I would have made it sooner! I don't think your reaction is much different to most of us before surgery. I think its the fear of unknown. My best advice to you is follow your surgeons and NUT's directions to a T and walk and sip as soon as you can post surgery. I had NO issues post opt and I had 5 days off of work and that was more than long enough for me. Good luck! You got this.
Age: 40 Height: 5'8" Highest Weight: 325 Starting Weight: 291 Current Weight: 166 Goal Weight: 160
VSG 10/24/14 with Dr. David Chengelis
on 1/13/16 3:50 pm
A well intentioned suggestion only, one I've given to other posters who have expressed similar concerns.
If you find your doubts and fears about surgery are affecting your sleep, your family, and your peace of mind, then yes, a few days of a mild sedative will help you get through the remaining days until surgery. It's no different, except in intensity, from the stuff they'll give you in the hospital to calm you down just before surgery.
psychoticparrot
I went thru similar thoughts. I had 225 pounds to lose and after losing 50, I questioned whether I could just keep going and do it on my own. Then I had a stressful day, and I remembered all the times I had dieted for months only to go off the diet and gain the weight back so fast!
If you started at 450 pounds, I would guess that you've had similar experiences. I would guess that if you could do it on your own, you wouldn't have gotten to 450 pounds.
The surgery really changes the physiology. It makes it possible to succeed. Not easy but possible. You have to make the commitment and follow your plan, but if you do, you'll lose the weight.
When I started the process, I would have been happy just to be under 300 pounds. I never thought I'd get below 200 pounds much less get to a normal BMI. But I did. I lost 225 pounds going from 385 pounds to 160. I'm a normal BMI. My energy is great. My knees and back don't hurt. I no longer need my cpap. I can travel and fit into an airplane seat, and I take the strenuous tours and keep up with the best of them. I love my sleeve.
Surgery and anesthesia is much better than it was when I was young. Surgery is less intrusive. Most people sail thru the surgery and are up and walking the same day. (I was, and I was 63 when I had surgery.) So try not to worry so much. Most likely you will do fine. And the fact that you've lost so much weight already makes the surgery even safer.
Please give yourself the gift of this surgery. It will change your life. There is some risk but it is small. I would do it again in a minute if I needed to to maintain my weight.
I found the process of getting used to my new tummy harder than the surgery, but even so, it was always manageable. Not fun, but not terrible.
Best of luck in your weight loss journey. I wish you the best.
Carol
Surgery May 1, 2013. Starting Weight 385, Surgery Weight 333, Current Weight 160. At GOAL!
Weight loss Pre-op 1-20 2-17 3-15 Post-op 1-20 2-18 3-15 4-14 5-16 6-11 7-12 8-8
9-11 10-7 11-7 12-7 13-8 14-6 15-3 16-7 17-3 18-3
You are having the same anxiety we all went through. I have one regret, I should have done this 3 years ago! Everyone's surgery experience is different. But, what someone told me and it was so true, your surgeon can help manager any pain and nausea. I fortunately had none but I had the meds handy just in case. My husband was also worried about me. I had him attend one of the support meetings prior to my surgery and he learned alot and felt much better about my decision. You'll do well. Wishing you a speedy recovery. Christine
I just had surgery Monday & I was pretty nervous ahead of time. That makes sense, tho! This is life-changing, in such a good way : ) I have struggled a bit with post-op pain & general yuckiness, but there is so much experience & support here....I think someone here knows the answer to everything! Many people have gone before us and we are so fortunate to be able to benefit from their experience. I also went through the "I can do this myself" moments, even though I have never successfully maintained any weight loss. I'm glad that I chose to do this; I look forward to feeling better, and to finally keeping weight off. Best of luck to you!