Eight weeks post-op and counting....

I agree with most of what you said, I have never once, ever looked at a heavy set person or judged them based on how they got there. In fact I am more so in their corner knowing the prejudices people have against heavy set people, I have experienced them myself obviously. As I slim down and regain my life, I will still be in their corner, because I know size doesn't mean laziness or lack of ability. I know most people have the best of intentions (there is that word again lol) and we all know what road good intentions paved. I have changed my eating habits considerably, long before even the surgery to fix part of the physical impairment. I haven't had sodas for years, diet or otherwise, I don't drink alcohol, I really didn't do sweets all that often, I don't really have a sweet tooth, sometimes I even don't want yogurt being it's just too sweet to my liking, even the light variety. I think the hardest part is adjusting to eating proteins first, veggies second because prior to surgery I would eat veggies first and protein second and by hard I mean remembering to eat the protein first. I think I got irritated by some on this thread because I chose a word, in this case "treat" hit a nerve with people who still struggle with their food choices, and I am not taking anything away from their struggles, not in the slightest. I realize everyone is different, not only physically, but also mentally, emotionally and so on. What works for one doesn't work for another. I hope no one has the illusion that I am just sitting on my backside waiting for the weight to drop and going out to eat, that club was the first thing i have had that I haven't prepared or measured myself at home. My mentality for my journey, is experiment with what works, if it works, run with it, if it doesn't then don't repeat it, and that's a philosophy that works well for me, in this journey and in life itself.

People are here are not judging. You posted that you ate half of a club sandwich as a reward. You should have known posting it you would hear from people. 

I am not a hater. I am a person *****ally gives a crap about people. I was just pointing out how we think about food really has to change. 

It is very easy to spiral. Make excuses for our choices. Like others have said the honeymoon period is real. I know it is real. I went from 322 to 183 and I am still obese which ****** me off. 

I going into my third year and I am really trying and working to get the rest of my weight off. 

Don't poo poo what people said. We really need to look at our meal plan. Mine had bread on it potatoes and other carbs. If  I followed that plan I wouldn't have lost as much. Following a protein forward diet is key to losing and keeping it off. 

I think people really didn't care that you ate a sandwich. I think you were rewarding yourself with it. That was the concern. 

It wasn't a reward, as I mentioned on a previous post on this thread that my using the word "treat" was not the best choice of words, I had the club as a matter of it just being variety, something different, not a craving of "Oh my god, gimme gimme gimme". Something different than what I have been eating over the past 3 months or so. I don't eat sweets, other than the odd piece of fruit now and then, for example I had about 6 grapes last night. I don't drink soda of any type, diet or regular and haven't for years. I can understand people having a difference of opinion as it relates to their issues, but their cir****tances aren't necessarily the same as my cir****tances regarding how I became obese. With the majority, the only similarity is that we had the same type of surgery. Even prior to my having surgery and the pre-op diet, I really didn't eat much, for instance my girlfriend eats more than I do and she's like 135 pounds. My cir****tances are mainly from and I will freely admit poor food choices over the years and no real physical activity due to the physical impairment. I changed my food choices a few years ago and was losing weight albeit at a tortoise's pace due to the lack of exercise, but in my opinion it was too little too late after 7 years or so of gaining weight, hence why I pursued the surgery and here I am.

I asked about a glass of wine once and got chastised for about 20 replies.... everyone means well, but it's not easy to be on the other end of it. You're doing great don't let anyone get you down!!!  :)

Oh I am not letting it get me down, and I am sure most mean well, I am equally as sure some don't, that a few believe that their lack of self control or resolve applies to everyone. It got so bad on a post last year I actually had to block like 3-4 people.

I can appreciate that there is some hypocrisy here, even in the responses to this post, but please don't throw out the baby with the bath water, so to speak.  The general advice you're being given is absolutely spot on and you really need to give it your full attention.  

I remember some of your earlier posts, including reading about your medical situation that contributed to you getting so heavy, but it's hard to fathom that your bad eating habits have not also played a major role, probably THE major role in your large weight gain.   I'm not saying that to be mean, really I'm not.  If I recall correctly, you have a LOT of weight to lose, so if you want to get this done, you really need to think about and incorporate what you've been told here.  

Unfortunately, most of us struggling with morbid obesit don't control junk carbs.  Instead, they control us.  Its hard to put the empty calorie carbs aside, but it's really important for this phase of your journey.  Maybe not forever, but definitely best delayed until much much later.  Take care.

edited several times for clarity - my apologies

I didn't take any malice from your reply. My problem was after that staph infection and the repercussions it caused 10 years ago, my activity went to nearly absolutely zero. That dynamic has changed and as such so have my results that I am been working through.

Yup. I hear ya. I guess the difference I would propose to you is that your inactivity was a problem that contributed to your weight gain, but at least over time, eating too much food became THE problem.  It's important to come to terms with that. Exercise will improve your functioning and will set you up for maintenance but it is not a big factor in why we gain or lose weight. It's all about the food, so I think it would be beneficial if you could start framing your situation around that.  Hence, that's why the advice you've been given is so critical.  Hope that helps. 

This is spot on... And I hope you start to take the advice presented by many people here seriously. Even if your activity level decreased, you still needed to be consuming more calories than your body needs to gain weight and ENOUGH weight gain to qualify for WLS indicates you were very much overeating.

Nobody here thinks eating a sandwich over a day leads to immediate weight gain... It is the behavior here that is being focused on and raising red flags.

You say you have no intention of eating junk and gaining back weight. Ok... Did any of us gain weight iintentionally? Definitely not. But our eating behaviors got us there and the more time you spend on these forums, the more you see that people that don't acknowledge and correct poor eating behaviors... Especially early out from surgery... Have not been successful for the long term.

i always liked club sandwiches because they're a bonus food. you get an extra piece of bread. one of the many delicious reasons i ended up qualifying for WLS.