Poor Me!!
Thank you all for your support, words of encouragement, and for sharing stories of your time in this "hell" that I am currently in. I do feel better after venting and reading all of your responses. Many of you provided me with a different way to look at these days of my journey and I will work to concentrate on those instead of the negative.
For those wondering...I DID NOT go off my plan yesterday. I unhappily drank my shakes (which I'm still quite sick of despite them "tasting" ok) and drank a ton of water. I stayed very busy last night to try and keep my focus off my misery and it seemed to have worked.
I realize this is going to be a daily struggle from now until October 8th and then a whole new struggle begins after surgery. I can't wait for the day when I say...."WOW! This was all so worth it!!" Until that day, I am extremely thankful that I have you and friends and family to lean on and to listen to be *****!
Thank you!
Age: 42 | Height: 5'9 | Surgery Date: 10/08/15 | Starting Weight: 279.2 | Surgery Weight: 266 | Goal Weight:165 | Current Weight: 224.8 | WL so far: 54.4 lbs
on 9/30/15 8:54 am
Let it out, let it out...gooooooood. It sucks. There's no getting around that -- it f*&%ing sucks. Now take a deep breath, acknowledge that it sucks, remember that this is temporary, and go find something fun to do or some way to spoil yourself to keep your mind off of how bad it sucks.
THANK YOU!!! It DOES f*$%ing suck!!!!
But...you are right...it is temporary and NOT an indication of the rest of my life as my stomach is trying to trick me into thinking so that I give up on the surgery completely and go back to eating anything and everything I want!
I like the spoiling myself idea!!
Age: 42 | Height: 5'9 | Surgery Date: 10/08/15 | Starting Weight: 279.2 | Surgery Weight: 266 | Goal Weight:165 | Current Weight: 224.8 | WL so far: 54.4 lbs
Yes, I was only able to find the Instant Carnation No Sugar Added Breakfast in Rich Milk Chocolate so was drinking those 4 times a day! Finally, I found a variety box at Amazon that contains a vanilla and a strawberry flavor as well so that helped a bit. Still shakes though...you know what I mean.
Thank you!!
Age: 42 | Height: 5'9 | Surgery Date: 10/08/15 | Starting Weight: 279.2 | Surgery Weight: 266 | Goal Weight:165 | Current Weight: 224.8 | WL so far: 54.4 lbs
on 9/30/15 10:11 am
Hah--I'm on day 9 of the liquid diet and I feel your pain!
I cook for my family (even though my wife tells me not to) and it's pretty rough being at the stove with all that good stuff and then give it away and sip on my protein shake morosely! I did chew a piece of spaghetti noodle a couple of days ago so I could decide if it was done. Then I spit it out--also morosely.
I can understand why docs do this though...if you can't handle a liquid diet pre-op then you're not mentally prepared for post-op care. Plus, if you're already used to it pre-op you aren't going to have as hard a time after surgery. Especially since you'll be in pain and possibly on drugs and your willpower might be weaker.
It does make me realize how much I fetishize food though. I doubt a "normal" person would have as much trouble doing this. In the middle of this pre-op diet I'm thinking about food constantly. I spend time at home on recipe sites. When I cook for my family I'm going overboard...the spaghetti I made? Fresh tomato sauce from vine ripened tomatoes I made myself. The smell made me swoon! That's normally more than I would do for a weekday dinner and I'm the only one doing it to myself. When my wife take a bite of something I've made I watch her face when she chews.
Definitely a learning experience.
I go in Oct. 7th for surgery--so I think you're my surgery buddy! Let me know how things go for you after. Good luck!
Hey Surgery Buddy!
You sound much stronger than me. I don't know that I could cook yummy things for anyone else and not at least try it. Luckily (or sadly?), I live alone so don't have to worry about others. I did volunteer last night to serve dinners and didn't find that too difficult though.
What you say about why docs put us through this makes sense then also makes me wonder if I'm having this hard of a time pre-op...am I really ready for surgery?!?!?!
Good luck with your surgery and let me know how you do. You'll be through it by the time I go in!
Age: 42 | Height: 5'9 | Surgery Date: 10/08/15 | Starting Weight: 279.2 | Surgery Weight: 266 | Goal Weight:165 | Current Weight: 224.8 | WL so far: 54.4 lbs