Worried....

So I'm starting to do that dangerous thing we call self doubt.... I'm 7 weeks out, yes I have lost some weight almost 50 pounds since surgery.  Which is awesome!!!  I go through the before and after pics on here and I see all these beautiful people and I think is this really real? Am I really going to have one of these success stories to tell?  I'm so scared that I won't make it for one reason or another... Does anyone else out there do this self doubt business?  Yes, I see a therapist, but he hasn't gone through this, so I start to question him sometimes as well.... the whole journey just seems surreal!

Nikki, you are doing awesome!  And your new tool will make it easier to keep to your plan so you will continue to do awesome!!!

I think the self doubt is very common because we all have a history of trying (and failing) to lose weight and/or trying (and failing) to keep weight off.

I am not that far ahead of you (about 8.5 months) so I can't speak for long term but I think you are going to be amazed at what the next several months hold for you.  It isn't all easy peasie but the struggles help you learn more about both your body and brain. 

So, relax, be patient, and enjoy the journey.

I'm only 1 week post op, but the journey is surreal. I understand how you feel going thru the success stories and pics.... But that will be us!!! I was just telling my mom the other day "pretty soon I don't think I will recognize myself!" I know in my case, being overweight and obese all my life, even with my yo-yo dieting, I never got down to a weight that was healthy for my 5' height....so I lay in bed and wonder what will I even look like being a Normal weight. It's a person I haven't met yet.

but I know how amazing I feel just 1 week out, down 17.2 lbs in just over 2 weeks since my pre op diet, I know I am committed to my surgeons plan, my new way of eating (once I can chew again!! lol), and continued success! 

Trust and have faith in the process, and with each small win, turn that win into one more ounce of confidence you have in yourself and in Your Success Story!!! We can do this!!!

I also had the self doubt, I think most people do.

We see the before and afters and "wonder"......

In the beginning we head down a road full of unknowns and way out of our comfort zone as we knew it.

The process is full of discovery and surprises both good and some bad.

I went with a known surgeon and program and basically "surrendered" myself to the process as they were the experts at what I was never able to do and what I wanted/needed.

I'll give you a few of the "Cliff Notes" as what I've seen as "high percentage" VSG success.

- Commitment and compliance is #1

- 600-800cal. programs do better than 1000-1200cal programs "typically"

- Patients that are told to increase cals and carbs as time goes on don't lose as much weight "typically"

- The more weight you lose, the harder it becomes and staying tight or tighter with your program is imperative.

- Learn to under eat your capacity, eating to stuffed full is how most of us got fat.

- Just because we can, dosen't mean we should.

- Good habits need to be learned.

- Hunger is not an emergency (thank you Elina).

As an SMO myself, I know how monumental the journey can be. I watched Jimbo lose 350lbs. from 580 in about 2 years, he really set the mark for me at what can be done.

Pick who you listen to on this board, some are quick to offer wonky suggestions and haven't even lost the weight. I'm not even suggesting you listen to me, there are many here that have done well and have great knowledge to share.

Yes, in the beginning everything seems very surreal, As you learn more and progress through the stages everything starts to make a lot of sense.

This is a day by day process, stay focused and committed and it will come to you !!!

Self doubt and posting this means you care..... people who care, tend to do better !!!

Hope this helps !

frisco 

Thanks for the cliff notes.  Such a work in progress!

Thank you so much!  Your kind words and advice is very helpful!  I think I get caught up sometimes on trying to "rush" this whole process. LOL Even though just the other day I gave out the advice, don't rush things, go as your Dr has planned.  Easier said than done.  I have so much I want to do when..... and when I get this weight I can.... I need to let go of those thoughts and work on the here and now and focus on working the plan and giving this my full attention, or there will be no I can do this when......  Your post really made me stop and think.  Thank you so much!!!  I like the "Hunger is not an emergency" Because in my life it has always been treated as such.... Definitely a concept I need to get embedded in my mind!!!  Good luck to you in your future endeavors!!!

I deal with a lot of self-doubt, and I'm over 2 years post op and I've lost 225 pounds and I'm at a normal BMI.  But I still worry that I'll lose focus and fall back to bad habits. 

I think the self-doubt can be a motivator.  It helps me to resist cheating on my plan.  Some days I'll be in the grocery store and walk thru the bakery section and I'll see the chocolate croissants and I'll tell myself.  "You've been good for over two years.  You deserve a chocolate croissant."  But I know that the day that I allow myself to buy junk food without a special occasion will be the beginning of the end.  So I walk away. 

I do allow myself to have treats and splurges, but I try to save them for special occasions.  I just went on a three-week vacation where I chose to abandon my plan, and I've gained 5 pounds... maybe 6.  I think its ok as long as I can get back on plan once I'm home.  We'll see how I do.  This is where the self-doubt comes in.  Can I do it?  So many people suffer regain.  They say the first two years are easy.  It scares me.  Hopefully I will overcome. 

So I'd say you have lots of company in the self-doubt arena.  Use it to your advantage.

best wishes,

Carol

Thank you for sharing your doubts with me and for your kind words.  I just want to let you know that your before and after pictures are among the ones that really got me motivated pre-op and that I go back and look at and think "Wow, I want to be like her"  Good Luck to you as well!!! Again, Thank you so much!!!

Your fears are normal and completely expected. I feel if you don't have some degree of fear and respect for this journey you become complacent and it gets easy to slack off. I have fear every day because I don't want to go back to where I came from. Some days its less than others but always a voice that reminds me not to, pardon my language, "**** the bed" with this opportunity. That doesn't mean I don't think I can do it, it simply reminds me to take it one day at a time and be aware.

Personally, I limited myself to weighing once per week only during the weight loss phase because historically I lived and died by the number on the scale. I never appreciated the food planning, journaling and exercising I'd do daily, just that number on the scale. If it didn't go down I was a failure and convinced I'd never succeed. And that led to self doubt and sabotage. So, with my wls, I committed to once per week weighing which allowed me to focus on my efforts each day and as a bonus i didnt have to stress if the number didnt move each day, those so-dreaded stalls. I saw progress each week, even if it was only 1 lb, and i celebrated it. It was hard to stop weighing daily (truthfully multiple times per day) but I wanted to use different tactics this time around. Make my cake with different ingredients, so to speak.

Do what you need to to shield yourself from the self doubt triggers. And don't compare yourself to others, this journey is as individual as your finger prints.

MissNexxie, Thank you for your encouraging and kind words.  I love the part where you say not to compare yourself to others.  I guess that's been a big issue for me, so that really spoke to me.  Thank you so much for your comments.  Good luck to you on your continued journey!!!