People still don't get it.

I have the same problem...

 Well, it's actually getting my family members to go to the support meetings. To my family, especially my mother, I was the one with the problem. 

My support system is my family and that is who I'm speaking up and I assumed – – that the support would be there. I'm alone most of the time  and to be honest kind of lonely.  

 Sadly, my doctors office is little over an hour away… It's not like there right around the corner. I actually wish that they were. 

 My doctors guidelines for protein were between 70 and 100 g of protein a day… At their urging the more protein I get the better off I would be. 

 The problem with the final argument is that spirit I have a very complicated relationship with my mother and am depending on her for  my nutritional needs.– I will be speaking with the social worker next week to resolve the issue. 

just the other night something came up and I had to go downstairs to do laundry because mom had some other task but she was doing and couldn't be bothered to help me… I really don't like being dirty and I don't like wearing dirty clothes...I am walking pretty good and I'm able to get out of bed all by myself and go to the bathroom and take a shower all by myself… But I wish somebody would go with me on my walks. 

I would not let anyone mess with my vitamins for meds – – unless they were a medical professional plus my mom thinks they're kind of unnecessary surprisingly I wouldn't be surprised if she would want to go to a witch doctor.  What I have tried to explain my meds and vitamins to my mom the eyes glaze over and totally zoned out… She  initially thought that I would only be on vitamins for a short amount of time and when I explained to her that I will be on them forever it was like a little lightbulb clicked on finally. 

I think it's also worth mentioning that she wanted me to go to a nursing home when I got out of the hospital my brother or her could not be bothered with me – – it was after I told her that the hospital would not let me leave unless they knew where I will be and who will be caring for me… in reality it has been pretty sucky all my caregiver is doing is just sleeping at night time make sure I'm OK ... I'm left alone most of the time ...

Ok, this might sound harsh but maybe that is a good thing.  If the people around you (your mother and brother) can't be bothered why force them?  And the more you move the better!  Why not adopt a dog and have a buddy you can do things with?  If you are able to get up and move around, clean yourself and do things on your own you can care for a dog.  Figure out the money for food situation first, and get yourself to where you can afford a dog.  Think of it this way, the sooner you can prove that you can and will do everything for yourself, you can be on your own, doing your own shopping, paying your own bills, and you can socialize with others and not be alone.  Work-mates, people outside of the home, being your own person.  Use this as your catalyst to get out of this situation.  

And don't look at the laundry as a bad thing.  Whether your mom is busy or not, you should go up and down those stairs to do your laundry.  Its exercise.  Its caring for yourself.  and its breaking out of the situation you are in now.  I know you are only a week out, but that should be something you can do unless there is a situation that is different with the stairs or where the laundry is located.  

And from a mom, you should be doing your own laundry.  ;)  

Might? You're right that is harsh. Not everyone can be as strong as everyone else. All that's easier said than done...I would not even be here if my car was here...because I work only during the school year I pay ahead on everything in the summer. 

On top of that under normal cir****tances I do my own laundry thank you very much.

Like I said, I do not have all your information, and none of what I am saying is coming as an attack.  I am trying to give you some positive sides to the story you are sharing with us.  But I only have what you share with us.  If you look at everything as an obstacle that is a struggle to get over it will lead to depression.  Trust me, I've been there.  But if you look at the positives, which I gave you, to the info you have provided then you can see that there are lots of opportunities we can take that will make things good again!  I'm just trying to help, and I speak plainly.  I apologize if you took whatever I had to say as an attack.

The comment about my son was me being facetious.  I often fall into sarcasm without thinking that intonation is not well translated through text.  I tried to communicate it with a winky-face, but that failed.

I made the choice early on in this process not to expect anyone else to change their lifestyle just because I was changing mine.  I make sure to prepare meals that are healthy for me, to buy foods that are healthy for me, and to stick to the lifestyle changes that I need to make for me.  No one else in my family signed on to this way of life.  

They do support me by cheering me on, being interested in my endeavors, and giving me hugs when I need them.  :)  But they put ice cream in the shopping cart when I'm not looking.  

That said, if your family is actively trying to sabotage you, that's something that needs to be addressed.  Are you seeing a therapist?  

I really wish there was a DISlike button!! I am so sorry!!! I have problems here too getting it through to my family that this just isn't a fad, I do need to eat 3 meals a day, my dietary intake is super important and I haven't even got to the dang surgery yet!!

I feel your pain.  If you need a friend and someone to chat with ADD me.  I'm also on FB (a lot, lol) so you could add me there too if you like. I am currently 513, HW 528 and I have mobility issues.  I am in a wheelchair and fighting for my mobility back. 

Keep doing what you are doing, keep putting your foot down and putting your grocery list ahead of anyone else's agenda!!  Maybe a mini fridge?? I have one its just not hooked up yet.  But you could have all your NEED items right on hand and when they start to diminish you can make sure that someone picks them up for you. 

Is there extended family, or friends that you can enlist to help you out??  I will add you to my prayer list too...hoping things change for you!!  Just remember family and friends have gotten used to who you were and they will have a hard time with changes because that means they have to change their behaviors as well.  Keep positive, know you have someone here to talk to, and don't ever give in!!!!  ((((HUGS))))

It sounds to me like these people may live with you.  It definitely sounds like they need bariatric education. A lot of people think the surgery is a magical way to lose weight without any effort whatsoever. Some people mean well and others don't. I have a family member that is jealous I am making positive changes in my life and they try to make fun of my desire/need for surgery.

I suggest counselling if it is a spouse. A lot of marriages break up due to people just not getting it. Counselling could help regardless. But I think you are on the right track... Getting them to a support meeting to hear the info first hand would be very helpful. Then you can quiz them to see if they absorbed anything. Of course, you can't make it look like a quiz... You have to be sly. For example, "hey, how much protein did they say I need? I can't remember if it's 100g per day or per meal. It can't be meal, right?"