strange feeling am I crazy
I sit here reading all these posts and I want to believe I will loose weight lol but I don't see myself thinner??? I have always been huge when I was 7 or 8 I was 170lbs I was 313 in 8th grade so I have never been normal so to think I can be a semi normal is odd to me lol im in a size 26w now and if I can get to a size 18 I would be so happy I so excited to start this journey and see where it leads me...right now im so pumped and ready to go I hope this.motivation stays with me.for life I want to loose weight and feel better and keep it off but for some reason mentally I can't seen me shrinking???? Anyone else go through this??? Or am I crazy lol
Don't worry it will happen, but sometimes the mental adjustment takes longer than the physical. I am 10 months out from my surgery and getting close to my goal weight. I now look at friends that I have always considered "normal weight" or "skinny" and have to tell my self that I am the same size (or even smaller). My brain still wants to think I am the "fat girl" in the room even though I have on size six pants. I really don't remember ever getting smaller than a size 10 on any other "diet" so I never thought I would get past that point. You will have a day very soon (like I did) when you will look in the mirror and say "who is that skinny person?"
on 4/23/15 11:31 am
I've lost count of how many posters were convinced they wouldn't fit into smaller sizes, then found to their astonishment that the garment in question was already too large for them.
I've lost 50 pounds, and except for much better mobility and energy, I still feel as though I'm at my high weight. Even those who have reached their target weights and maintained for many years still have issues about body image.
If that's the worst problem you encounter on your WL journey, you're doing just fine.
And ... you're NOT crazy.
psychoticparrot
"Live for what today has to offer, not for what yesterday has taken away."
It takes a while for our minds to catch up to our bodies. I am 2 years post op. I've lost 225 pounds and I'm at a normal BMI. And I still do a double-take when walking past a mirror. It doesn't seem like that can be me.
I think you will be so happy with the results of the surgery. It really does change our bodies so that the weight becomes manageable. Obesity is a disease and WLS is a treatment that works!
best of luck in your journey.
Carol
Surgery May 1, 2013. Starting Weight 385, Surgery Weight 333, Current Weight 160. At GOAL!
Weight loss Pre-op 1-20 2-17 3-15 Post-op 1-20 2-18 3-15 4-14 5-16 6-11 7-12 8-8
9-11 10-7 11-7 12-7 13-8 14-6 15-3 16-7 17-3 18-3
Gwen, you're not crazy! What you're describing is perfectly normal. For most of us, we've had so many years of losing/re-gaining, many times even more, that it's hard to fathom that we can actually lose all of the weight we need to and keep it off. I think for me it was fear of yet another failure. If you follow the plan given to you, you will lose and get to that "normal" place. It does take time for the mind to catch up though. However, it does happen. I'm a little more than 3 1/2 years out, and most of the time, I see myself the way I am. I no longer get that feeling in the pit of my stomach of will I fit into that booth, on that ride, etc. I can look at clothes and eyeball them to tell if they'll fit or not, etc. If I get back into eating the wrong way and gaining a few pounds, as I did awhile ago, the fat tapes start running again, so that "fat thinking" doesn't go away totally, but it is so much better. This whole process is a journey, and you'll get there!
I'm in your shoes too. I cannot remember a time, EVER, when I was "normal sized" or, dare I suggest, "thin." It just never happened. I was in Weigh****chers at age 10 weighing 140 lbs. Crazy.
I started at a size 22/24 at 303 lbs. That was my breaking point. To imagine myself "normal sized"... well, I couldn't do it. And you know something? I still can't. I don't see it.
At 15 months post-op, I've lost over 130 lbs. I weigh 168 and last weekend to my delight, I found myself fitting in size 10. I've NEVER been in size 10 before (okay, maybe when I was 7 or 8 years old!) but when I started, I thought, "Wow, if only I could get in size 16 again. That'd be nice." SIZE FREAKIN 10. It blew me away.
It does take your brain about 2 years to catch up though. I still grab the largest size on the racks. I still see myself as bigger than I am in the mirror. My friends and family see how I am right now and I do not process what they tell me about my size. It's mind-boggling. Completely mind-boggling.
We all go through it. Hang in there. Follow your plan and mentally, you WILL catch up at some point. If you are having trouble with it, seek out the aid of a psychologist or your center. They may have someone who can help. It's a tough thing to grasp when you've been overweight your whole life... so seeing a "normal sized" you in the mirror takes time.
OTTAWA -- 2011 - Contemplated WLS Feb. 15, 2013 - GP Feb. 20 - lung functioning Feb. 22 - blood work Feb. 27 - Referral April 19 - orientation, bloodwork July 10 - nurse July 23 - rheumatologist (VSG) Sept. 12 - Behaviourist & Dietician Oct. 23 - Echocardiogram Nov. 6 - Pre-surgery Class Nov. 12 - Surgeon Jan 13, 2014 - Optifast (3 wks) Jan. 27 - PATTS Feb. 3, 2014 - Surgery (VSG)
HEIGHT: 5'5" HW 303 Pre-Opti 297 SW 271 GW 170 CW 200 (Feb. 8, 2018 - damn the regain!) VSG with Dr. Yelle