I lied today...

Maybe there are so many horror stories out there, or people who've gained all their weight back etc, that the successful stories get lost in the mix.

Yeah I've had people be really blunt, like what weight you've started, what are you now, what are you going for etc, etc, but I can tell they were a little uncomfortable asking so bluntly, & they did ask if I was getting too personal, but I hate hiding & if I can inspire someone else then I can take being a little uncomfortable.

There's such a stigma attached to wls & it ****** me off that some people can be so crude & rude about something so personal. Good luck as you move forward, hopefully it'll get to a place where your weight isn't a topic of discussion.

In my opinion, yes, that's wrong.  If you could have done it with diet and exercise, you wouldn't have gotten surgery.  

In this situation, I would have opted for saying, "I'm sorry, but that's not any of your business."  Or some variation of "I'm not talking about this with you."  

Don't you think by saying that you are saying you had surgery?

I don't believe that, nope.  If someone wants to make that assumption, that's certainly their right to do, but I don't believe that it's saying I had surgery.  

Personally, though, I'd rather control the information that people have about me.  I know, in a workplace, people are going to gossip, so I'd rather just tell them I had surgery and let them gossip about the truth :)

Two coworkers had the same surgery and both gained all their weight back (I see them both eat fast food regularly, which makes me sad), so whenever I hear people say things about the surgery at work it's never anything positive.  In hindsight I probably should have told her the truth, but in hindsight, she probably shouldn't have asked!

Again this is only my opinion, but that would be all the more reason I'd want to be honest about my surgery - so I could show people that it's a super positive thing if you make it work :)  I wouldn't want those co-workers to be the reference point people had for this amazing experience I've had.  

You're totally right, though, she should not have asked.  It was rude and completely inappropriate.  

I haven't had surgery yet,I am scheduled for July.  I haven't told anyone except my husband, and my medical team.  Oh and btw. . . my primary care physician went up one side of me and down the other telling me how wrong WLS is.  I told my surgeon and he said it was because she's never had a weight problem.  She is under weight and has to eat all the time to not look like a bag of bones.  I agree with you, it is personal.  My sisters who have never been overweight, much less obese wouldn't understand.  I think they would think this was the easy way out.  But they don't know about the weight loss and maintenance, and all the testing, and the psych evaluation and everything else I went through just to qualify for the surgery.  If they went through all that, they wouldn't think it was the easy way out. Don't let it bother you!  It is personal.

My PCP wouldn't sign off on it either (though she has never said anything about my weight to me, and it was difficult to get her to refer me to a nutritionist years ago), because she said that if I just "stopped eating junk and exercised" I would lose the weight naturally.  I politely requested another opinion :).  The doctor that ended up giving me the referral told me she thought it was a great idea, and has seen so many successes from the surgery.  Best of luck on your journey!! I regret some aspects of it (things I wish I could have done differently, like start exercising regularly sooner after surgery), but I am so happy I had the surgery!!

That's funny. .  my PCP said the same thing.  I found a physician's assistant that supported me, and sent my PCP a thank you note for referring me to the program :) I was also told to prove my PCP wrong.  So when I go back to her for my annual in October, it will be 3 months after my VSG.  Hopefully she will be speechless.

Best of luck to you too!

I've told everyone I know and lots of people I don't know that I had the surgery. I truly don't care who knows it. One of the advantages of being 63 years old is that you stop caring what other people think or say about you, especially meddlesome, nosy characters.

On the other hand, my husband (also 63 years old) is considering getting the surgery in October, and he wants NO ONE but me to know. He's even considering not telling our son about it! If he has the surgery, I will respect his decision and not tell anyone. And if it takes a little white lie to do it, I will.

Don't beat yourself up because some nosy person asked you a question she should not have asked. The greater transgression is hers.

psychoticparrot