I feel like I'm losing control a little bit...

Stacy_WLS
on 4/19/14 1:59 pm

Over the past few weeks, I have noticed that I have been letting myself add little things here and there to my diet.  My therapist got into my head a bit about me starving my body.  I have been using that as an excuse to say yes a bit too often.  I am still losing weight, so it is easy for me to say, oh whatever it is ok.  

In the past when I have lost weight, it slowed and I slowly let myself go off track.  I am terrified of this happening again.  

I think I need to crack back down for a while.  I have a dinner planned for 5/6.  I'd like to feel like I am back in control by then.  I know how to do this and just need to stick to my guns!  

VSG: 12/12/13, LBL, small TL, BL/BA: 11/7/14 Twins 12/9/18 HW after Twins 260. 5'10 37 years old - Stacy_WLS (MFP)

feels_so_good
on 4/19/14 2:10 pm
VSG on 05/20/14

That's my biggest fear. The sleeve is only a tool, we still need our head/mind to achieve success. Congrats on your self awareness and best of luck reaching your goal. Remember your OH family, along with other resources are waiting to help.You deserve a healthy life - DO IT!!!

 

5'10" Male : Consult Weight 428 1/16/14 : Pre-op m1 -3, m2 -12, m3 0, m4 -27 : SW 386 : m1 -25, m2 -22 m3 -15 4 -12: LW 278 CW 320 : Total Loss 108

Stacy_WLS
on 4/19/14 10:30 pm

Yes!  I think I may head back to OA tonight.  My head is definitely a work in progress.  

Thank you for the support :)

VSG: 12/12/13, LBL, small TL, BL/BA: 11/7/14 Twins 12/9/18 HW after Twins 260. 5'10 37 years old - Stacy_WLS (MFP)

mollz007
on 4/19/14 2:15 pm
VSG on 02/20/14

I am in a similar place Stacy. It is brave of you to own it and admit it here. All we can do is just pick ourselves back up and get back on track. You can do it!

check out my blog!

       



Stacy_WLS
on 4/19/14 10:20 pm

Thank you!  You can do it as well.  I was embarrassed to update myfitnesspal and nervous about posting this.  But seriously, this is what the board is for.  We aren't all perfect and need support when things get tough.  

VSG: 12/12/13, LBL, small TL, BL/BA: 11/7/14 Twins 12/9/18 HW after Twins 260. 5'10 37 years old - Stacy_WLS (MFP)

GingerJen
on 4/19/14 2:50 pm
VSG on 03/07/14

You have done so well! Do you think you are relaxing a bit here and there because you have achieved some goals? I saw your onederland post! Yay! I find sometimes on a long weight journey that I need a few mini breaks-kind of easing up on the gas a little. 

The last time I lost a bung of weight, I think I failed because I pushed so hard to the end. And then I didn't know how to ease up on the gas pedal a little-so I ended up just completely reverting to old behaviors. I think part of learning how to live healthy is learning how to not be 100% sometimes and be ok. Notice I said "sometimes."  I tend to be all or nothing and so I need practice at sometimes. I hope this makes sense.

Try not to be so hard on yourself! Your fitness and weight loss achievements are amazing and in a very short time period! Maybe try to set some boundaries-maybe a little looser than before-but enough where you can feel good about not slipping backwards!

37 y/o female 5'8" HW 355 consult 329 SW (3/7/2014)301 CW 168 goal 170

M1- 26 M2- 14 M3- 15 M4 -13 M5 -16 M6-12 M7-2 M8-5 M9-6 M10-8 M11-1 M12-5  M13-10 Goal reached 4/5/15 total lost 187 lbs total; 133 in the 13 months since surgery

Stacy_WLS
on 4/19/14 10:17 pm

This is exactly what is going through my mind.  Last night was not sooooo bad.  I ended the day at 1500 calories.  Which is way over for me.  But really I need to be able to live life.  Going out with friends is part of a healthy life.  I am torn between feeling guilty about the extra bit of dessert I had or being content with the fact that I didn't stop on the way home for tons of junk food. 

I think balance is key.  I'm going to a fabulous restaurant (Girl in the Goat) in a couple of weeks and really want to enjoy it.  So I think focusing back again and keeping out the little bites for a bit will be a good way to do that.  

I know maintenance is going to be my biggest struggle b/c super strict is relatively ok for me, but once the door opens finding balance is HARD!

VSG: 12/12/13, LBL, small TL, BL/BA: 11/7/14 Twins 12/9/18 HW after Twins 260. 5'10 37 years old - Stacy_WLS (MFP)

skeller
on 4/19/14 3:10 pm - Austin, TX
VSG on 05/01/14 with

The point that ginger made is a good one: seeing my WL efforts in black and white often makes me throw my hands up in despair and head for the refrigerator. Learning to see the grey is what allows me more and more often to say to myself, "No, that was a bad choice, but I can make a good choice right now." It helps if I don't try and penalize myself for making a bad choice today by imagining I can make it up tomorrow, either. Every day is a new day, and I do my best with that day.

That said, I think I know the fear you're describing well, myself--and I, too, am terrified that my WL successes will disappear in a puff of smoke because I have lied to myself about some poor choice or other.

As far as what your therapist said, I think it's something to keep in mind if you respect her experience, training, and knowledge of you. If you don't, then I would say fvck that, probably, unless what you're doing isn't getting you the results you want, or you are developing a medically-measurable deficiency of some sort (vitamin deficiency, for example).

Stick to your guns and your rollerblades, girl!

DOB 1958, HT 5'4" . . . HW 310, SW 281, CW 184.3

M1 -25, M2 -7, M3 -11.9, M4 -7.6, M5 -11.8, M6 -9.6, M7 -1.7, M8 -10, M9 -5, M10 -5

    

Stacy_WLS
on 4/19/14 10:21 pm

thank you :)

VSG: 12/12/13, LBL, small TL, BL/BA: 11/7/14 Twins 12/9/18 HW after Twins 260. 5'10 37 years old - Stacy_WLS (MFP)

frisco
on 4/19/14 6:46 pm

You know how to do this, stick to your guns and keep it tight !

Your doing great !

frisco

SW 338lbs. GW 175lbs. Goal in 11 months. CW 148lbs. WL 190lbs.

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