OT? I don't think so. But maybe? I just need some thoughts on dating

Thanks. I feel like the board has changed recently, unless it's just me? Oh well. I'll start chiming in more.

And you're right! I'm just bad at making people change things because of me. Does that make sense? Like, I usually just suck it up if I'm not happy with my meal or something like that. But you made me realize I'm allowed to make it on my terms and if that person still wants to get to to know me, he'll accept that.

I don't know. This whole dating thing is for the birds! lol

Thank you for your comments. Much appreciated!!

I think as fat people we become very good at accomodating others and trying to not make waves. Sometimes we say "yes" on autopilot without thinking about what we really want.

When I met my current boyfriend, he told me he didn't drink. Not only was it not a problem for me, but it was also kind of cool.

It sounds to me like your weight loss has also inspired confidence in you and might be what is attracting people. If u want one drink sip it n drink water with it to help "flush" it out n not getting too tipsy. But just be careful for ur own sake, calories n safety overall. (But who am I to say anything, I haven't had surgery yet n over ate pizza tonight) 

I have some thoughts on dating.

First, if someone you're interested in asks you out, go.  Even if it involves dinner.  You can eat at a restaurant and make good choices.  Focus on the conversation.

Second, decide what you want your life to look like in the future and date people who fit into that view.  What I mean is, if you want your life to involve running, or biking, or rock climbing, or ballroom dancing, or whatever, find people who are willing to be active with you to date.  There is no reason a date can't involve burning calories WITH your clothes on. :)

I moved to CA during the dot-com boom.  There were young men with too much money all over the place.  I dated a lot of them (often only once).  Here's what I learned from that experience:  there are a lot of really nice people that, for whatever reason, I just didn't click with.  I went on only one date with a lot of perfectly nice, attractive guys, and didn't go out with them a second time because there just wasn't a spark.  From that, I learned that if someone else didn't ask me out a second time, it was probably the same thing and not some giant character flaw or physical blemish. 

Go out.  Have fun.  Be active.  Drink water.