Man, this stuff gets harder the closer to "normal" you get (ramblings)

So, Monday will mark the end of month 19 for me. I've lost 4 pounds so far this month and I was kind of feeling sorry for myself. My husband looked at me like I was freaking crazy and said, "You've lost 208 pounds, you weigh 166 right now, you averaged one pound per week. Tell me why this is a problem."

He's right. My BMI is at 27 or so right now, so I'm nearing "normal". I have absolutely no right to be complaining about ~only~ losing one pound per week 19 months out and so close to a normal body weight. I think I sometimes get stuck in my own head and have to realize that eventually I'm going to stop losing, that "weight loss high" isn't going to last forever.

BUT man... **** is getting real around here. I had upped my calories to 1000 per day to give myself some room and see what happens. Yeah, that stalled me. Dammit. Apparently, my body really loses best right at 700-800, so I'm cranking it back down. It's kind of screwing with my head a little, but this is temporary. I can go back up when I get into maintenance.

I'm in denial because I'm pretty sure the protein bar I enjoy now and then is stalling me out too. Crap. It seems like every 10 pounds or so I find something else I have to cut out to keep losing. I could absolutely stop losing right now. My primary doctor said she'd be perfectly happy for me to stay under a 30 BMI, but I don't feel like I'm done. I want to keep going. I want to see that BMI of 23 or so. I know I can do it. But DAMN this is a fight.

At the same time, I have to keep my sanity. So, I still eat "off plan" an average of one day per week, but I gotta tighten things back down a little. I need to also watch my carbs a little better, which is tough because I need that morning cottage cheese and FiberSure but it has 10 carbs, so that means I gotta be super careful the rest of the day.

Why am I posting? Mostly for accountability. Those that are on MFP know I've been slacking the past couple of weeks a little and not doing what I am supposed to be doing. I'm riding that line of "good enough" which really ISN'T good enough.

I continue to be a stair step loser. I think that's pretty normal. I'm REALLY glad I've kept my weekly and monthly numbers on my profile. It's a good "check in" with myself so I know it's still "working".

Just a reminder to you that those of you who are 'further out' are guiding lights to the rest of us.  I started out as a 'lightweight' so my loss all along (5 1/2 whole months!) has been a bit slower, so maybe that won't affect my head as badly.  We'll see.

Remember 'normal' weight loss plans or 'dieting'?  Remember that a 1-2 lb weight loss per week was considered 'best' and 'safest' for long-term maintenance?  Well, if not, remind yourself that THAT is where you are now.  I suspect physiologically and psychologically, our bodies are 'preparing' for maintenance with that slow down; finding a way to reach equilibrium.  You're doing awesomely well, and you are especially lucky to have such a SENSIBLE husband! 

Keep shining that light, girl!

Thanks. I know you and he are right. For some reason I was just all bummed out. Partially because I know I've been slipping a little more than I should be. A lot of it has to do with my mental health stabilizing again. I'm still working through some things in therapy, I suspect I always will be. LOL.

But yeah. I think part of it is me saying, "Hey, I wonder what will happen if I do... XYZ" and I need to stop that for now. LOL

You are so close you can taste the sea water. Go hard core. 600 cals 20 carbs 80 protein tons of water and tons of exercise. In a month you would be right where you want to be. Maybe get a personal trainer to get you across the finish line.

It's not the same for everybody...I've been hard core for several weeks and have discovered my body has just

refused to let go of more weight..nut said to fine tune a little and add some calories so my body doesn't think

I'm starving...working on that now in hopes of moving scale..it's not fun  working this hard and not even seeing a half

pound loss in 3 weeks.  I started out as a lighter weight..have lost 48 lbs..w/about 43 more to go.

To nnalraH - You may also want to go see a doc or an endocrinologist to rule out any other underlying causes of not losing and being hard core.

I had a trainer, had a body media body bugg and ate clean/paleo but had a thyroid prob. oh and PCOS.

Easier said than done this far out. :) I've found 600 calories leaves me feeling really groggy, I also end up not getting enough protein and I stop losing. Like I said, that 700-800 range is where I really need to be. I do well most days, but not nearly as often as I should. I just gotta get my head back in the game.

But at the same time, the loss is going to slow. There's absolutely no way I would lose 16 pounds in a month. LOL.

I'll get there. I just need to take a deep breath and relax a little. I was just too wound up this morning about it and it made me realize that I need to look at where I've come from and how I've gotten there so far and stop constantly looking how far away the finish line is.

I like your ramblings. It keeps it real. This surgery is not the easy way. No shortcuts. Work is required for weight loss and long-term maint.

You have done great and I know you'll continue building on that success.

Thanks and yes... you have to work, it's not a picnic in any way, shape or form. Staying at 600 the first six months was easy and I didn't get that horrible grogginess. It is what it is. My doctors all want me eating more, but it does stall me so we're jus****ching my blood work and how I feel and going by that. Ahhh.. fun.

Girl you have lost 208 pounds...that is amazing!!!! You can do this it may take a little longer than you want it to, but you got this!!! You are my hero, when I look at what you have accomplished I hope and pray I can be as good as you once I get my sleeve! Keep up the good work.

Rock that sleeve!!!