Now I want to talk about Jo's post - skewed expectations.

My appointment at the University hospital bariatrics service is on the 29 th, there is no need for insurance approval as I automatically qualify, one of the world's best is coming to do my surgery and show his technique to a bunch of surgeons, on me.... All that is left is to do the pre op tests and labs and set a date, probably early January....and for me to learn to manage expectations effectively. My decision IS made and I am also a researcher and did my homework, contacted the best surgeon, convinced him to operate on me in another country and, well, I am pretty sure I will be successful. I do already eat right - a lot, but right! I have no self esteem issues. I have a great family. Fabulous job, great life... So I want it to be long. Size 4 jeans will be nice but I am really OK in my size 18 now too. I like myself just fine so I am not taking any of these issues into the operating room with me. I love food and hope to continue to love it in smaller quantities after the sleeve is done. I hope the pain factor and discomfort will be short lived. And most of all I want to regain control of my body which I lost somewhere along the way.
Tell me more about your journeys. It really helps! I am glad I found this site before surgery. Going in with eyes wide open!!!

Feel free to read about my and my journey on my profile.  I'm pretty open and transparent about my life, my struggles, etc.

I'm going to second that this has been the easiest hardest thing I've ever done.  I was not an emotional eater.  I had what I call "tapeworm syndrome", what others call a broken satiety switch.  My stomach NEVER said it was full.  I was hungry all the time - could eat a meal and be back eating again in 30 minutes.  So I ate a lot, and most of it not crap - just a lot.

The first few months after surgery are hard.  Your routines and patterns are upset.  You're carefully testing the water on every "new" food that you try, even though it's things you've eaten all your life.  Then the new routines set in.  You have a pantry/fridge full of new and old foods that you can eat.  You feel better.  You move better.  You sleep better.

The surgery did everything I wanted.  It killed the tapeworm.  I get normal hungry after 3-4 hours, and a few ounces of food is enough to satisfy and take me another 3-4 hours.  I still love good food.  I still eat out.  I eat socially.  I just eat a lot less.  Some foods I've said goodbye to, probably for life (refined carbs/sugar), and it's been okay.  Sticking to the diet has been surprisingly easy and unstressful.  I'm not saying I haven't had meltdowns and days of frustration, but not nearly as many or as severe as I expected.  

The surgery met my expectations about 6 months out.  I was off of diabetes meds, off of high blood pressure meds, joints weren't aching anymore, stress incontinence was gone (I can sneeze and cough with impunity!), and I was able to exercise and almost enjoy the process.

Best of luck on your surgery.

Thank you, emelar!  I too have struggled with that wretched, ravenous hunger.  I had to eat a *ton* of food to feel full.  I still get hungry, but it feels much more appropriate, and definitely cured with much less food.

Sounds like you will do great!  It has been such a good decision for me, and it actually made it easier for me to know I was still going to have to do my part. 

You know that saying, everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die?  That's how I felt about WLS just before surgery.  It takes a lot of courage to cross that line, but it's the only way to reap the rewards.  I feel pretty certain your health problems will improve, and if your life is good now, it will only be better.

Here's my list. My expectations have been met or surpassed!

1. I do not get nearly as hungry after WLS, and it takes very little food to fill me up. Awesome!!
2. I am truly satiated and satisfied with just two hundred calories at a meal. This still shocks me sometimes.
3. I was no longer obese within three months of my surgery. I'm now within 10 pounds of a normal BMI, and it's only been about 4 months since surgery!
4. I saw some quick weight loss in the pre-op week, but never so fast after that. NO BIG DEAL. The trend is down, so who cares?
5. If the scale goes up at all, it's not for long and within a few days it's back down again.
6. I am able to successfully adhere to a diet with way lower calories than I ever thought possible. Not counting the discomfort of the surgery itself, this is the easiest weight loss I have ever achieved. I've lost way more weight in four months after the sleeve than I could in two years of Weigh****chers, with way less stress, measuring, and did I mention stress?
7. Losing the weight has solved a lot of problems I expected it to. My feet and back don't hurt, stairs are easy, I can play sports, and I'm no longer the fattest person at every work situation. People treat me with more respect, and I'm in a better mood. I'm more comfortable generally, and shopping is more fun.
8. My social life is just as fun as it ever was, despite the fact I don't eat much.
9. My excellent marriage is even better.
10. I don't know how long this weight will be off me, but so far so good. I'm going to work like crazy to never let it come back. I can't imagine ever being able to eat like I used to, so I think my chances are pretty good.

Of course, you don't want to have unrealistic expectations, but cautious optimism is entirely warranted.

What a great post, and look how good you're doing!!  I do love not needing to eat so much to be satisfied.  I think that is the absolute best part.  Even more than the weight loss!  I mean, you can starve yourself down, but it's the hope I have about being satisfied with less that makes me think I can keep it off!

So, I'm coming into this discussion that is pretty much done and over with, but I saw it this morning and didn't have time to really dig into it. Now it's the evening and I have the time, so I read the entire thread and really want to "talk".

I am pre op. I am so antsy waiting for my surgery date. I wake up in the morning thinking about it. My surgeon emailed me on Monday night saying my file was reviewed and given to the surgical coordinator. I hoped for a call on Tuesday. Then kept hoping on Wednesday. I finally called today to find the coordinator will be out until Monday. UGH..... I had so hoped for a December date, too. Probably not going to happen now.

I have expectations about the VSG. I don't think I will magically become a new person who loves to eat properly and exercise anymore than I think my legs will grow another 4 inches after surgery. I don't think I will never want to eat pie, or cookies, or ice cream again - ice cream has been a dear friend of mine for the last 7 years. I can't imagine that friendship just abruptly ending - I envision it more like a long drawn break up. I don't expect the journey to be easy either. I think there will be pain, frustration, and adjustments in behavior that will be so difficult I'll bust!

I have lost 25 pounds so that my surgeon would agree to operate. 6 years ago I lost about 65 pounds and kept it off for a few months and felt great and actually did a 12K.  I can lose weight. It's hard as hell now that I'm not in my 20s and 30s, but I can do it. A crappy side effect of being in my 40s is that the weight also seems to come on faster than it used to. (What's up with that?) Anyway...

I EXPECT that losing weight with the VSG will not be the struggle it currently is. It is desperately hard to stay at 1200 calories a day for me. I know how to eat, but sometimes the physical hunger is severe - especially in the afternoons. I expect that a sleeve will make this part of food restriction more bearable.

I EXPECT to have good restriction IF I eat the correct foods - like dense proteins always first and stay away from slider foods like mashed potatoes and pasta. Feeling satisfied sooner is something I am looking forward to.

I EXPECT having my sleeve will help me deal better with my absolute worst trigger situation - free food (meaning buffet, all you can eat style).I expect that my sleeve will help me limit what I can consume on the rare occasion that I lose it after surgery. Example: I was at an all day meeting today. It started as a breakfast meetingat 7:30 and went through lunch until about 3:00. Well, I lost it. Breakfast was a pastry and fruit bar. Not a lick of protein to be found. Ate a bit of fruit and a small piece of spice bread and the trigger went off - I probably ate 600 calories, maybe more at breakfast.

I EXPECT to lose weight IF I follow my nut's plan.

I EXPECT that having the VSG will change my life for the better in many ways - being healthier, being more aware how and what I eat. I am already hyper aware of protein and vitamins and that has really changed how I view food.

So, I ask, are my expectations off target? It has taken me several years to accept WLS and become comfortable with the fact that it is the right option for me. I KNOW that it's going to be work, but it's got to be worth it. It has to. Why do WLS if the results aren't worth the journey?

Happy, thank you so much for the post. I enjoy your perspective and the conversation you started up again really proved to be thought provoking for me. Bless all of you wonderful OHers for your words of encouragement, support and knowledge.

Go****hink you have very reasonable expectations.  These are exactly what it has been like for me.  Mostly recently, I followed a 1400 calorie/day food plan for five months and was extremely hungry almost every single day.  I never got used to it.

I am doing find on 650-ish calories right now.  I know it won't always be like this, but I feel a little more confident that the crazed frantic hunger won't come back.