Need advice, Very Off Topic..Dealing with haters.

omg! rolling on the floor.

and to clarify for those who asked: the party is for my friend's (the date) bestfriend. not worried about offending him if i dont go, shiiit these days i do as i please     he 100% knows the situation although he doesnt put himself in my shoes and wonders why i would be upset.

Sounds to me that whole family is jealous of you..and now with how hott and sexy you look, the wife must really be jealous.. Go and Enjoy yourself and have a blast.. it will make her envious even more... You look fantastic!  Don't let her rain on your parade...

Haterz hate. That's what they do.  It's their problem not yours.  If you've been polite, respectful, etc., there's no reason to second guess yourself.

IMO, your date is the problem.  Ask your date why he wants you to attend a party hosted by people who have treated you disrepectfully and obviously dislike you?  Does he condone their treatment of you or simply want to avoid 'confrontation' with his BFF?

If he wants to go to the party, fine, but either a) he makes of point well before the party of telling the haterz  they must behave civilly and respectfully toward you a condition of your both attending and he agrees to leave if they misbehave, or b) he go by himself and understand that he's putting that relationship ahead of yours.  You don't have to subject yourself to mistreatment or waste any effort in a relationship with someone who allows that behavior to continue unabated.

Hugs!

Do you like the guy you are going with? He isn't hating on you like the other guy and his family?

This is jealousy, pure and simple. If you like the guy and he's not giving you ANY of the same negative vibes as his best friend and family, go to the party. They are jealous of you and there's no use in trying to figure out why.

Could you go with the friend and then ask him about an hour into the party if he'd like to go dancing or run to a movie or somehting? That way, you get time with him without the haters around.

Look, I'm almost 41, I'm outspoken, opinionated and I say it as I see it (I've been minding myself on the forum so I don't get banned)  you need to do what makes YOU happy. It sounds like you are going to have to be around these people from time to time. Just be yourself and let them call (your folks?) and complain. They have a choice to hate you and you ahve a choice to let it bother you or not.

You are awesome wrapped in cool with a hot-new-body bow on top. Let the bitterness the haters feel eat them from the inside out. Don't let it bother you.

You be you.

I LOVE LOVE LOVE your posts and look at any topic that shows you on it. Don't let them bring you down.

Thanks for all your wonderfulness here on the OH.

wish there was a like button for China's comment...I second that

Stay Away !! Party with people that you like. You should never go around people that make you fill uncomfortable.

Did you ever think that maybe all of this might stem from the wife and it might just be the little green jealously issue? You have gotten it together, in your 20s and have the remainder of your life to look forward to, she is in her 40s looking back and for whatever reason has elected you to focus her envy, or what loss feelings she may have on and the husband and son have picked it up. Just saying?

Anyway, I say go, have a great time, be yourself and to top it off, send a thank you not after wards! You aren't going to change these people so just be who you are!

Hugs

Carlen

Wait, they CALL YOU to tell you they didn't like your behavior? Like you need another set of parents?

My first inclination would be to ditch the party, second to go but put them on ignore. Third, and esp. at THAT time of the month, I'd show up looking better than great, with a sharp and skeptical look in my eye and a backbone of steel.

Then... let NOTHING pass. I'm not saying to be aggressive, but if they start in on you, to call them on it. "Really? What exactly was it about feeding Fluffy that I did wrong? Well, maybe you have someone else do it in the future. I'm not trying to be rude, I'm just being honest. It's better than lying, right?"

And/or... respond by saying, "really, you thought Fluffy got too much Meow Mix? Huh." and turn away, completely unruffled, and talk to someone else.

If you think you can have a good time with them there, then by all means go. But if those jerks are gonna make you upset, don't bother giving them the pleasure of **** talking you.

I sense you want to go and likely will go....however in the picture you paint, I wouldn't waste my time in that situation.