It's so hard to watch my mother kill herself..
I live with her and my stepdad and it is so hard to see..Every time I try and talk to her about it she says "when X happens then I'll lose weight".. For as long as I can remember she has had terrible eating habits which have caught up with her..
Its so hard to watch knowing there is a solution and that she refuses to go after the solution.
I plead with her to get help, so she can see me graduate as a veterinarian, so she can meet her grandchildren in the future..but unfortunately she just blows me off completely..
I feel so helpless..
Just had to get that off my chest.
HW: 258lbs SW: 240 CW: 140 I am 5 foot 7 and 30 years old
VSG 12/21/10 Plastics: Tummy tuck, breast lift, and augmentation 11/3/11
Soon to be veterinarian!! xoxo
Hey Sassy.... tough situation.....
It's tough to watch someone degrade from obesity..........
Maybe a family intervention is in order.
What's gonna happen is gonna happen......you just gotta lay it all on the table....if she comes around...that's great.... if she doesn't go for it...ya can't do nothing more about it.... but you will at least have a clear conscious that you tried and will have no regrets.
One of my best Friends was the one that called me out on my weight.....All though I resisted and was pissed at first..... I am very grateful to him now... he just may have saved my life !!!
frisco
SW 338lbs. GW 175lbs. Goal in 11 months. CW 148lbs. WL 190lbs.
" To eat is a necessity, but to eat intelligently is an art "
VSG Maintenance Group Forum
http://www.obesityhelp.com/group/VSGM/discussion/
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Dr. Paul Cirangle
JIMBO... 350lbs! lost!..... TRIPLE CENTURY CLUB!! HELL ...YEAH!
MY VSG......KICKS ASS! 
I am 6' 2" 
I'm so sorry you're dealing with this. So many others seem to face the same thing, since obesity runs in families. It's hard to accept that in the end it's her choice, but truly it is.
You and stepdad can try the blunt, painful truth but only she can make a decision to do something about it.
I know it hurts. My sister just cannot see how saving her life is worth giving up what she wants to eat. Part of it is major depression that she won't treat out of pride (she's stronger than that, she thinks)
Highest weight: 335 lbs, BMI 50.9
Pre-op weight: 319 lbs, BMI 48.5
Current range: 140-144, BMI 21.3 - 22
175+ lbs lost, maintaining since February 2012
As I was prepping for my surgery, my beautiful daughter started to gain weight. As I've lost over these months, she has gained. Like your mother, she is very resistant and while we have always had a good relationship, she is very tetchy about the way I eat and the way I "watch" her eat. She's right. At least my dd is in therapy and goes faithfully every week. Would your mom consider that "for her depression?"
I so wish I had the magic that could help your mom, help my daughter. What I will say, though, is that NO ONE ever really shook me up re: my weight. I wish my husband or family had. They were just too "polite" and they also knew that I thought weight was a political/social/feminist issue. That was probably pretty intimidating but still, I wish someone had said "Is it a cause you want to DIE for?"
Highest 255 Surgery 248 Current 170
Goal: 150
I think Frisco's idea of an intervention is a good one-- you'll never know if you don't try.
In my case, I was the one who needed the intervention... though had them somewhat regularly from my family and doctors. I was in total denial and hadn't hit bottom until I was diagnosed with diabetes just before my 30th birthday. It was me who kind of knew all along that I had to do something to help myself, but was just in such total denial about how bad it'd gotten.
I hope that somehow you or the rest of your family can get through to her-- to let her know that she is important to you and that your life will be worse off without her in it. And that there *is* a way for her to get help.
Good luck.
HW-304 / SW- 286 / CW-198.25 / GW-170
I have the same worries about my Sister. She's quite heavy and has checked into surgery but won't move forward. I am hoping she eventually will.
My best friend was like a brother to me, and I loved him very much! He just died on the 1st of July and my heart is still heavy. He died of all the things most of us had in common. He was extremely overweight, he had high cholesterol, high BP, and severe sleep apnea. He was 46 years old.
Frisco is right. Have the intervention and try to make her see the light. If she chooses not to, then you know you did everything you could.
Take care of you Sweety!
Heidi
Behind every success is effort...Behind every effort is passion...Behind every passion is someone with the courage to try.
