no support

(deactivated member)
on 7/8/11 7:53 pm
She appears to have issues with the WLS that have nothing to do with you and everything to do with herself.  
 
She may pick friends that she finds some 'fault' with to make her feel better about herself, and if you fix your 'fault', she'll lose that feeling.

If she's used to getting more attention than you at your place of employment, she may be afraid of losing some of it to you after you lose weight and feel better about yourself.

It could be anything really... but it's still sad to have a friendship in turmoil.  No matter what, you aren't responsible for her attitutude or actions, and if living a healthier, happier, and potentially much longer life is the trade-off for her friendship, you'll be better off with supportive friends and letting her live with her choice.

I remember reading once that our circle of extended friends change about once every 7 years.  Our interests evolve and change, and that seems to be what is happening here to a certain extent, perhaps?
waitingtoexhale2
on 7/8/11 9:38 pm
I experienced the same thing in my work place.  I am waiting on my approval at this time but my best bud at work does not approve.  We are very close and she actually said that she hopes my plans (approval of surgery) falls thru as she thinks that it is too risky.  I respect her opinion, but at the end of the day, you must do what is best for you.  I have strongly disagreed with many things that she has done on a personal level, but she did them anyway.  I just kept stepping and chalked it off as her decision and she will have to live with the good and the bad of it.  Don't internalize it (although it hurts), as long as your hubby and mom has your back.....you are good to go.

Waitingtoexhale2

The race is not given to the swift or the strong, but to the one that endures to the end.

    
HW 357
Pre-Op Weight 343
Weight several hours after surgery 339
    
DrHollywood
on 7/9/11 2:02 am, edited 7/9/11 2:02 am - Harbor City, CA
Question:

Is  your so called friend you share everything with at work, BIG?
Because if so,  she is in fear of you getting healthy and jealous.

If she is not, That is no friend and you need to dump her.  You just suround
yourself with people who will support you and make other WLS friends.

Hun,  They say we lose relationships with this journey.  We dont have to, but
it happens.

We are here for ya!   Keep talking to those other peeeeps in the office that
support you.  Dont mind her.  ( i know you will)  but you will get through this
and it will make you a stronger person.

I have the faith for you.  Add me as a friend...  I am here for you!

                      ✿ L♦O♦V♦E ✿ & ✿ P♦E♦A♦C♦E ✿ღ ✿ & F♦R♦I♦E♦N♦D♦S ✿ ღ
                         "Keeping The Faith!"   "Slim by Summer!"
                                    HW: 250 - SW: 241  - CW: 154.7GW: 140  

     
 1 month: 22 pounds (2162 months: 12.2 pounds (203.8)  3 months: 10.6  (193.2)
 4 months: 9.7  lbs  (183.5)  5 Months:   6  pounds  (177.5 ) 
6 Months: 12 lbs ( 165.5)
 7 Months 7.1 lbs (158.4) 8 Months +1.6 pounds(159.8) 9 Months 2.7 pounds (157.1)
10 Months 8.1 lbs (149) 11 months +2 pounds ( 151) 1 YEAR!!!  2.6 pounds (148.4)


  
                                  Hit "One-derland April 9th, 2011   (199.7)

                                  "Half-Way Goal" April 25th, 2011 (194.8)

                                  "Happyland 80`s" May 14, 2011  (189.6)

                                   "Groovyland 70`s"  June 20th 2011  (179.9)

                                    " HippyDippyland 60's"  July 16th  (169.8)

                                       " CQQL-land 50`s"  August 25th ( 159.8)

                        "Normal BMI"   24.8  October 21st, 2011 (154.5) I am 5`6

                                 "AWESOME-land 40's" Dec 1st 2011  (149)

                              "Century Club 100 Pounds"  Dec 1st 2011  (149)

                                        ' ONE YEAR SURGIVERSARY!!!"

                                           Two Year Surgiversary!!!"


                                                                     

Kristy R.
on 7/9/11 2:46 am - Santa Clara, CA
 She is ridiculous.  I would cut her out and share your excitement and victories with those who care and support you.  People have a conception that you have to be super morbidly obese in order for them to be OK with you having surgery.  It's none of her business, and she is obviously not educated about obesity in general, let alone the requirements to be approved by insurance companies.  I  I keep work life and the rest of my life separate.  I had one job, when I was very young, where I mixed the two and I learned my lesson big time.   I'm glad most others are supportive for you.
~Kristy~ VSG 3/29/11 ~ 15 pounds lost pre-op, SW - 240/GW - 150
 
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