Emergency-Need you NOT FLAME

Debbie, First, know that we care about you and only want to support you. I think you've been given a lot of good advice so far, but I would encourage you to focus on the positives and I like Wanda's suggestion of listing everything you need to do each day. Try adding one item a day or week and build up to everything. Also, be sure not to beat yourself up when you make a mistake. We all make them. The important part is to always accept yourself, learn from it, and move on. You can do this Debbie and know that we're here for you anytime you need us. Best wishes! ~Wanda

Thanks, it is nice to have some support. Seems like I have been everyones support for months. New manager 23 employees all calling my name. Mom getting more dementia all the time. My husband a diabetic shoving sweets in his mouth with a sugar reading of 300+. Been a little hard lately

Hi Debbie: We have or will be in the same position. Start today as the FIRST day after surgery. Take a piece of paper and write out ALL the things you MUST do in a day. Include all supplements and list them individually. Include 64 ounces of water -- list this in 8 ounce increments. Include 60 grams of protein -- listed in 20 gram increments. Include exercise of at least 30 minutes per day. If you cannot do exercies that includes your feet -- do chair exercises for the upper body. DO SOMETHING -- ANYTHING -- MOVE!!! Then take it somewhere and xerox about 100 copies. Each day marks off the item as you take/eat it. Do NOT mark it off unless you eat/take it. Do not eat or take anything that cannot be marked off your list. Be sure to mark EVERYTHING off each and every day as you eat/take it. I had surgery 14 months ago and I STILL do this. It is the ONLY way I can keep in control of "me"!

I will try-I work in doctor's office--site manager

Debbie, This is truly NOT a flame, But a Welcome to my world. I had my RNY GB in August 2004. At my heaviest I was 295. At the beginning of August 2005 I weighed 170. Now, I range between 185 and 190. I know its all my fault too. I have been COMPLETELY stressed out since August. My husband lost his job of 5 yrs with a good company (there just went the coverage for my plastic surgery). He had gotten another job right before he got fired, but they didn't check his references for a week, and this was after he got fired, so his former employer gave him a bad reference and he was stuck with NOTHING. He's been delivering pizza and interviewing all over the place when he can. However, most places he has told his former employer is giving him a bad reference simply tell him they can't hire him because he hasn't been with the Pizza Place long enough for it to count as a reference. Anwyays, you know the whole drama, bills piling up, collectors calling, and how do I react to it? The same way I did when I was 295, by eating everything that is not nailed down. To make matters worse, My gym membership expired the 1st of Sept. So my stress reliever of going to the gym, the 2 hours a day I couldn't eat, was taken away from me. Luckily, I won an award in Oct so I renewed my membership, but then I got promoted in Dec and I have been extremely busy with work since. I am going to the gym when I get off work tonight, even if it is only for a little while, and I am going back tomorrow. My husband has gained back all of the sympathy weight he gained after I first had my RNY GB as well. He has asked me to help put him on a diet and help him loose weight. But you know that song and dance, diet food is expensive. Why should I go to the grocery store and spend $10 on groceries I have to cook when I can spend $4-5 at McDonald's on a couple of hamburgers. With money being tight, we have to go with the cheapest route for food and such. He has said he would go to the rec center in Chesapeake to excersize, but I honestly just dont have the $30 it would take for us to join. To top it off, I have been having pains in my side since last spring. Right now, we dont have the money for me to keep seeing the doctors. When I have seen my surgeon, he says see my PCP, when I see my PCP, she says see my surgeon. Back and forth. I've had an ultrasound and a CAT Scan. No one knows whats wrong with me and no one cares. I can't switch surgeons or get a revision because my insurance no longer covers WLS. My life is out of control. I refuse to buy new clothes. I am just suffering with the ones that are too tight. Maybe if my pants are too tight, I wont eat. I just wanted to share with you the chaos of my life so you know you are not the only post op out there who isn't living a fairy tale. Having this surgery simply alters our digestion. It doesn't fix our brains, it doesn't make our lives perfect, reduce stress or solve any problem other than the way we digest our food. I just would like to know where this magic wand is that has suddenly made all of these post ops perfect. Leland

Ok, I wrote about how chaotic my life is and how everything is going wrong, but I should have written about what few things I am doing to stay on target. First, for me, out of sight is out of mind. So I keep my calcium and vitamins sitting on my desk at work and another round sitting on my kitchen counter. When I see them, I remember to take them. I am getting at least 2-3 vitamins each day and 1000-1500 of calcium each day. Not perfect, but better than nothing. I haven't been tempted to go back to soda. But I have gone back on caffiene. I drink about 6 Diet Snapple Peach Iced Teas each day. No sugar, no calories, no carbonation, but they do have caffeine. Yes, I snack and I eat things I shouldn't. But I honestly do what I can. I don't take any protein supplements per se. Occasionally, I will drink one on a day I am working out. Even though its expensive, I eat a bag of Turkey Jerky or Beef jerky pretty much each day. They range from 35 to 55 grams of protein. I start my day off with a Blue Bunny Smoothie too. 5 grams of sugar, but its like 13 grams of protein. I snack at night on Special K, its 7 grams of protein per serving. So I feel like after all that, I dont need to drink any kind of protein supplement, I am good. Weekends are where my life falls off the path. But I feel like if I am doing good 5 days a week, It wont kill me if I skip a couple vitamins over the weekend or if I only get 500 of calicum each day. I went back to the gym last night, I am going tonight. I HATE Carido with a passion. I used to reward my self with 30 secs of pool time for every minute of cardio. (30 mins of cardio gets me 15 mins in the pool) I went last night, and of course, the health department has closed the pool, hot tub and sauna area. No suprise, Bally's isn't known for being clean. Anyways, I did my cardio and headed home. Tonight I will do cardio again and a little work with weights. I spend 25 minutes on the bike making a mental list of all the crap like dishes and laundry I really need to be doing at home. It makes me feel guilty for being at the gym when I really have tons of housework to do. Next week, I have a meeting Mon, Tues and Wed. Which means I will only be able to go to the gym Thursday night. Every little bit counts. My suggestions would be: Go over the list of what your surgeon / dietician reccomends as far as Protein, Water, Vitamins and Calcium. Cut that list in half. Make it your goal on your check off list each day to do HALF of what you were reccomended. When you are in a good flow and hitting the half, up it to 75%. Eventually, you will get to where you are close to 100% most of the time. Figure out what excercises you CAN do. If walking is not possible due to your foot injury, see what you can do without walking. Maybe arm / leg lifts on the floor. You are probably at work when it comes on, but Al Roker on the TODAY show is taking on a weight loss challenge. He is being trained in stretching resistence excersises. These do not require you to stand or have weights. Maybe their web site has a list of them. Tape the Today show on Wed, that is when he weighs in, works on receipes for diets, etc. He's been loosing 5lbs a week on this 3 hour diet. Basically he gets to eat every 3 hours. Breakfast 400 calories, snack 100 calories, lunch 400 calories, snack 100 calories, dinner 400 calories, snack 100 calories. Just a few ideas! Hopefully you can keep moving forward! Leland

((((((((((((( HUGS )))))))))))))))))) I haven't had the surgery yet, so my saying anything wouldn't be valid, except to give you a cyber hug and say " YOU CAN DO IT " !!!!! What wonderful advise these ladies have given. Going to go make my charts so that I can have them ready for when I get home April surgery date 1-30-06