one month today

Well I have made it through my first month post op. Officially I have lost 25 lbs (scales at home put me at 30) and I can see some little changes. All in all I am happy with the decision I made and glad I went through with it. I didn't not have any real pain or issues with my surgery. There is only one thing that I have experienced that I didn't expect and hadn't heard from anyone else. My one surgery related issue has been feeling so abnormal. The frustrations of having to plan my day around my eating/protein schedule, not being able to go out to restaurants, having to make special preparations to my food before I can eat it and even having to take so much longer to eat than my friends and family has been so hard to deal with. I of course knew that I had to make these changes for myself, and I know some of them are temporary but I wasn't prepared for the mental battle. I have talked to a few people that I know who had surgery and they have assured me that the reason no one talks about it is because it is easily forgotten once you move on to the next stage but that they felt it also. The only other issue I have had has been more personal. I am single and live alone and am a very independent person. It has been hard feeling like I am "stuck" at home by myself during this time (partly because I am too stubborn to ask friends and family to entertain me). A lot of this is also from dealing with the recent break up of my relationship before surgery and I have just had to sit back and deal with it all. I am very excited about the rest of my journey. I am excited about getting back to work next week. I hope everyone has a very Happy New Year and that it brings them the best. Courtney 1 month today 305/280/155

Awww, Sweet Courtney...I know just how you feel. Having to deal with a breakup and surgery is so hard. If you have read my post...5 days after surgery, my husband emailed me that he wanted a divorce. Having to deal with that and not having any family nearby and the lonliness is so hard. Wish we lived near to each other. I know that in the very near future, things will be so much better. We have a wonderful future ahead of us, Courtney. A real life change for the better. This is temporary and when we get some strength in our wings, we are going to fly! I am right beside you, girlfriend...we are in this together and God will see us through. If you want to talk, I am here. ( I used to live in Manassas, in fact, I went to Stonewall Jackson High School years and years ago.) Hugs, Betsy

Thanks for the encouragement Betsy. I know there is a lot of things going for me now and a lot of things coming up in the future. Sometimes it just helps to get the feelings out there so they are not festering inside. Can't wait to see you at the conference. Courtney 1 month 305/280/155

Courtney, I have also been having some of your same feelings. I've been stuck at home for a month. Although I live with my husband and grown daughter, they work different schedules and I don't see them that much in the course of the day. I'm still an early riser and my husband works evening/nights, so he's sleeping most of the day and then getting ready for work. My daughter gets off her job at 3:00 but I still don't see much of her... ok, she's 21 and has a life, I understand that. If you've read my profile, you'll know that my shoulder was injured during surgery, so that has prevented me from driving much... just to the store, but I can only lift the bags with my left arm, so that's even limited. I've been TRYING to focus on the postive things, what I can do now to prepare for this process, and going back to work. I started rearraning my closet by size (bigger sizes to smaller sizes) but my right arm gave out 1/2 way through, so now I have a pile of clothes that needs to be rehung. I find I spend a LOT of time focused on food. Much more than before surgery... watching cooking shows, looking for WLS friendly recipes, etc. That doesn't seem good, but at least I recognize it, so I'm trying to stop myself when I start! I'm looking forward to going back to work just to occupy my mind and time. Take care and have a Happy New Year, Tammy

Well I am glad to know that I am not alone in my strange thoughts. I am sure you are frustrated since you are even more limited because of your shoulder. Reorganizing the closet sounds like fun, maybe I will get into mine and see what I can do. I am not sure that the focusing on food is all bad but I suppose it can get obsessive. As long as you are under control then it should be ok. Have a great New Year. courtney